since i was young, i always wanted to be a nurse, because that's what my big sister (who i idolized) wanted to be. she never made it past her cna for personal reasons, and now i'm in college, about to take my cna this term. i'm very excited... i have always wanted to help people, and due to my personal history as a child.. i recognize that what ever career i go into, it must meet certain requirments. there must be stability, security, and must be a demand for it. i can't be one of those people who got a degree, but are working at mc.donnalds cause they can't find a job. so nursing sounds great... so for about 5 years now, that's been my choice, and i'm taking all the steps to make it happen.
but i have a problem.. my family, mainly my boyfriend of four years (who knows me better than anyone) and his mother have voiced some of their concerns about nursing with me. both know that i was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder, and i have issues with being shy. also they both know i am a very sensitive person and they make it sound like i just wont be able to handle the death, and the heartbreaking stories i will hear as a nurse. they think my love for children will make it even harder for me. they say im gonna have to completly change if i want to do this career, which i understand- but i don't think i have to change in a bad way right? im so sensitive that books make me cry, movies make me genuinly scared, and sad movies make me cry...i guess it's hard for me to remind myself it's not real.
i keep telling myself, that i have met many nurses who are kind and gentle. that i don't have to turn cold and callus to become a nurse. but...if you read this far- i thank you and could you please let me know from your own experience what you think about my situation? are my family right to disuade me from nursing? even if i think it's the best choice? what kind of problems do you forsee me encounering that i might not have already thought of? and can you issue any advice to me at all on this predicament. thank you so much for your replies in advance. i hope it can cheer me up, or make me see the light.
First of all, being shy and having social anxiety should not impact your relationship with your patients. Lots of patients respond to the quiet, soft types and you don't have to be aggressive to be a good nurse. Also, the one to one relationship you will have with your patients should not stir-up your social anxiety either. I have had some of that myself, and the helping relationship I have with my patient did not bring up that anxiety for me personally. Where I have had to deal with social anxiety issues is more with my coworkers and that is a whole other area where nursing can be very challenging. But what I have done to get through those times is to concentrate on my relationships with my patients and used that as my empowerment to get through the other challenges.
That is not to say that I don't agree 100% with the advice that others have offered on this thread that you should look into getting some kind of treatment. The issues you are dealing with are VERY treatable and will make your life much more enjoyable if you can manage your anxiety and shyness.
Don't let your boyfriend talk you out of your dream. You are the only one who can decide what is right for you by following your own internal guidance...if your heart has been telling you to be a nurse, I would pay close attention to that. Stay true to that inner voice and you will never go wrong.
Dealing with death, disease, pain and grief is a part of nursing...but so is it a part of life. You cannot escape it in life.... so to avoid nursing because it has more of it than other career choices is pretty absurd in my thinking. It gives one the opportunity to come to terms with those areas more so than others in life. It gives you depth as a human being. Don't forget that you also will see the human condition at its best as well. You will learn how to cope with what you see; how to support others through difficult times without taking it all on yourself. You CAN do it. I promise.
A boyfriend of four years can be a pretty powerful force in one's life. It concerns me that he is trying to persuade you not to follow your dream. I would think a real partner would do whatever he could to make sure that your dreams came true. It sounds like a control issue to me and if I were you I would put up a few red flags...something isn't quite right in that picture... IMHO
since i was young, i always wanted to be a nurse, because that's what my big sister (who i idolized) wanted to be. she never made it past her cna for personal reasons, and now i'm in college, about to take my cna this term. i'm very excited... i have always wanted to help people, and due to my personal history as a child.. i recognize that what ever career i go into, it must meet certain requirments. there must be stability, security, and must be a demand for it. i can't be one of those people who got a degree, but are working at mc.donnalds cause they can't find a job. so nursing sounds great... so for about 5 years now, that's been my choice, and i'm taking all the steps to make it happen.
but i have a problem.. my family, mainly my boyfriend of four years (who knows me better than anyone) and his mother have voiced some of their concerns about nursing with me. both know that i was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder, and i have issues with being shy. also they both know i am a very sensitive person and they make it sound like i just wont be able to handle the death, and the heartbreaking stories i will hear as a nurse. they think my love for children will make it even harder for me. they say im gonna have to completly change if i want to do this career, which i understand- but i don't think i have to change in a bad way right? im so sensitive that books make me cry, movies make me genuinly scared, and sad movies make me cry...i guess it's hard for me to remind myself it's not real.
i keep telling myself, that i have met many nurses who are kind and gentle. that i don't have to turn cold and callus to become a nurse. but...if you read this far- i thank you and could you please let me know from your own experience what you think about my situation? are my family right to disuade me from nursing? even if i think it's the best choice? what kind of problems do you forsee me encounering that i might not have already thought of? and can you issue any advice to me at all on this predicament. thank you so much for your replies in advance. i hope it can cheer me up, or make me see the light.
well, i am kind, very sensitive, and have an anxiety disorder and am doing great in school (grad in dec) and at my tech job in the er. only you know in your heart what you are capable of...i say go for it! :)
deeDawntee, RN
1,579 Posts
Wow, what a brave and honest post!
First of all, being shy and having social anxiety should not impact your relationship with your patients. Lots of patients respond to the quiet, soft types and you don't have to be aggressive to be a good nurse. Also, the one to one relationship you will have with your patients should not stir-up your social anxiety either. I have had some of that myself, and the helping relationship I have with my patient did not bring up that anxiety for me personally. Where I have had to deal with social anxiety issues is more with my coworkers and that is a whole other area where nursing can be very challenging. But what I have done to get through those times is to concentrate on my relationships with my patients and used that as my empowerment to get through the other challenges.
That is not to say that I don't agree 100% with the advice that others have offered on this thread that you should look into getting some kind of treatment. The issues you are dealing with are VERY treatable and will make your life much more enjoyable if you can manage your anxiety and shyness.
Don't let your boyfriend talk you out of your dream. You are the only one who can decide what is right for you by following your own internal guidance...if your heart has been telling you to be a nurse, I would pay close attention to that. Stay true to that inner voice and you will never go wrong.
Dealing with death, disease, pain and grief is a part of nursing...but so is it a part of life. You cannot escape it in life.... so to avoid nursing because it has more of it than other career choices is pretty absurd in my thinking. It gives one the opportunity to come to terms with those areas more so than others in life. It gives you depth as a human being. Don't forget that you also will see the human condition at its best as well. You will learn how to cope with what you see; how to support others through difficult times without taking it all on yourself. You CAN do it. I promise.
A boyfriend of four years can be a pretty powerful force in one's life. It concerns me that he is trying to persuade you not to follow your dream. I would think a real partner would do whatever he could to make sure that your dreams came true. It sounds like a control issue to me and if I were you I would put up a few red flags...something isn't quite right in that picture... IMHO
Good luck and go for it!
:yeah: