Hi, my name is AngelfireRN, I'll be your nurse tonight.
I am not a waitress, nor am I your slave.
Yelling and hurling obscenities at me will not get you your pain meds any sooner than they are ordered. Nor will having your family member or entourage do the same.
Threatening lawsuits and having umpteen family members camp out in the halls or hold up the nurse's station will not get you preferential treatment.
Physically grabbing me as I go down the hall is NOT a good idea.
I do not give the orders, but I do have to follow/enforce them. This is something that you should take up with your doctor.
No, I will not call him again to ask him for more pain medicine. He has been called twice and has said no both times.
No, I will not give you his number so you can "straighten him out".
No, you are not my only patient, and I highly doubt that you are single-handedly paying my salary. On the off chance that you are, let's talk about a raise.
NO, NO, NO, I most empahatically will NOT come get you when it is time for your next pain shot while you are having a smoke break. I also will not bring it to you in the smoking room. (Have actually said that, I am allergic to cigarettes. I did it once, had an asthma attack, desatted to 83, and turned blue, according to the patient and my charge nurse, after the patient had to help me back to the floor).
No, I don't really care if your family has not eaten all day, they drove here by themselves, they are not sick, and no, I will not call for 6 guest trays. (This of course, is if the patient in question does not need all 6 family members present, and is not at death's door).
No, you may not have 3 six-packs of soda from the kitchen, there are other people that would like a snack, too.
No, they will not open up the kitchen up just for you, at 1 in the morning, because you don't like the snacks we have on the floor.
I could think of hundreds, but those will do for a start. I know it sounds mean, but this is why I got out of bedside nursing. When a hospital becomes the Hilton, I'm gone!
I told you 6 times I don't know when the doctor will come in. It suprises me as much as it does you.
No I will not call for non-urgent issues. I told you that already. I left a note and it will be addressed in the morning. You had a BM 2 days ago - you don't have constipation and it's not an emergency.
Please shut up and go to sleep before I explode.
I don't know what your x-ray says. I don't have access to that. The doctor will let you know. I told you that three times. What part do you not understand?
No, I don't know why he ordered another x-ray. Refer to the above.
I don't have the authority to let you go to your son's graduation. You NEED to be in the hospital. You can't check out and in like a hotel. Sorry.
If you don't want me to change your NG - stop complaining about how uncomfortable/irritating it is everytime I come in. I really don't care since you just want to whine.
You are told to be NPO for a reason. Stop sneaking in drinks. That messes with the NG output and affects your care. Stop asking your son to lie for you.
I can't take the NG tube out. That's a doctor's order. Besides, that's the reason you are here for. We did not put it in for sh!ts and giggles.
I'm not going to bring you a bedpan so that you can soak the bed again. Get up and use the bathroom or the commode. You are a young woman and completely independent.
You are not ordered a sleeping pill and it's 4 oclock in the morning. I left a note for the doctor to order it in the morning so you can have it the following night.
I said I can't give you sleeping pill now. I legally cannot.
I was soooooooooooo glad to leave! I had sicker pts and this lady took up all my time and made my whole day busy and miserable.
At least you gave me a laugh after an exhausting, tiring day and a very long job interview (got the job), where I had to do a complicated medication calculations exam! Thanks, it's just what I needed!
I also had a patient like this one night shift. She'd had shoulder surgery, whined the whole night (I didn't mind that so much), but she refused strong pain med's (except panadol), and wanted to make a complaint re the anaesthetist, which I had nothing to do with. I gave her a lot of my time that night & really tried to get her comfortable, but nothing was going to pacify her. I finally told her shoulder surgery HURTS - it's especially uncomfortable cos you can't GET comfortable, no matter how many pillows & slings you use, you have to sleep sitting up. I also told her I was neglecting my many other post-op patients due to her & she finally slept 4 a bit. I couldn't WAIT to get out the door that morning!
Specializes in med-surg, psych, ER, school nurse-CRNP.
I DID say this today...I was ashamed after, until my OM backed me, and said that Doc would have done the same thing.
A patient came in and said that she had arbitrarily stopped taking her Lexapro (of which she was on a higher dose) cold-turkey, because she was having chest pains, and her friend told her Lexapro caused that.
"When did you start having the chest pains?"
"About a month ago."
"Did you call here and notify us?"
"No, my friend said the Lexapro was causing it, so I just stopped. I'm telling you now."
"So, let me get this straight...you were having chest pains, and rather than call us and let us tell you what to do, you just took the word of a friend, adjusted your own meds, and left it."
"Well, yeah...she said that she had the same thing."
"That's really good, X. Do you realize you could have been having a heart attack, or something SERIOUS? Do you know that Lexapro has to be titrated, and that quitting cold-turkey can cause MAJOR issues? Did your friend tell you any of THAT?"
"No...hey are you mad?"
""Yes. Yes I am. I get mad when my patients don't do what they're supposed to do, and when they do things that could hurt them, and that includes adjusting your own meds and not calling us when you're having chest pain!"
"Well, nothing happened...hey, can I have an extra Lorcet a day? I started taking 5 a day and it really helps....."
One look from me at that point and she shut up. Spare me from the Google Med School graduates and the "Well, my friend..." scholars.
Last I heard, doc was checking her chart, and was considering dismissal for noncompliance. Seems it wasn't the first time she'd done this.
Oh, and apparently the door was open in the next room (there are 2 that separate the exam rooms, ours was closed, as always). I know my voice carries, you can hear a pin drop in that office, the insulation is so bad. I had made every effort NOT to yell, and did well, I thought, until my next patient (who is used to me and my views on compliance) walked in, sat down, and greeted me with..."I've been taking mine like I was supposed to."
Specializes in med-surg, psych, ER, school nurse-CRNP.
"Please leave the door open, or cracked, if you don't mind." This was a walk-in, my last patient of the day, and no one else was in office except staff, so no danger of HIPAA violations.
"Oh, are you hot?"
"Yes, it gets stuffy in here."
What I WANTED to say was..."Yes, and you reek to high Heaven and I don't want to be closed up with it." It amazes me how many people come in just rank with body odor. And as bad as I feel for noticing...it's called a bath, and soap is cheap. Much cheaper than that gold mine hanging around your neck and the cigs in your pocket.
Not much bothers me, except noncompliance. Nasty, though....nasty definitely bothers me.
I DID say this today...I was ashamed after, until my OM backed me, and said that Doc would have done the same thing.
A patient came in and said that she had arbitrarily stopped taking her Lexapro (of which she was on a higher dose) cold-turkey, because she was having chest pains, and her friend told her Lexapro caused that.
"When did you start having the chest pains?"
"About a month ago."
"Did you call here and notify us?"
"No, my friend said the Lexapro was causing it, so I just stopped. I'm telling you now."
"So, let me get this straight...you were having chest pains, and rather than call us and let us tell you what to do, you just took the word of a friend, adjusted your own meds, and left it."
"Well, yeah...she said that she had the same thing."
"That's really good, X. Do you realize you could have been having a heart attack, or something SERIOUS? Do you know that Lexapro has to be titrated, and that quitting cold-turkey can cause MAJOR issues? Did your friend tell you any of THAT?"
"No...hey are you mad?"
""Yes. Yes I am. I get mad when my patients don't do what they're supposed to do, and when they do things that could hurt them, and that includes adjusting your own meds and not calling us when you're having chest pain!"
"Well, nothing happened...hey, can I have an extra Lorcet a day? I started taking 5 a day and it really helps....."
One look from me at that point and she shut up. Spare me from the Google Med School graduates and the "Well, my friend..." scholars.
Last I heard, doc was checking her chart, and was considering dismissal for noncompliance. Seems it wasn't the first time she'd done this.
Oh, and apparently the door was open in the next room (there are 2 that separate the exam rooms, ours was closed, as always). I know my voice carries, you can hear a pin drop in that office, the insulation is so bad. I had made every effort NOT to yell, and did well, I thought, until my next patient (who is used to me and my views on compliance) walked in, sat down, and greeted me with..."I've been taking mine like I was supposed to."
my next patient (who is used to me and my views on compliance) walked in, sat down, and greeted me with..."I've been taking mine like I was supposed to."
It is always amazing to me that many people do not understand that they will experience pain after surgery
People are, I know none of us is surprised to learn, morons - I had surgery a couple of years ago to pin a couple of broken bones in my hand. While I was being consented the surgeon warned me that I'd have scarring - I was so tempted to reply "Really? You can't insert the screws with just the power of your mind? Damn, that sucks! What about my career as a hand model?" because clearly some people are surprised to realise surgery and scars go together...
Thank you, thank you. It was our last day before vacation, and I think I'm due. My BS tolerance level was at an all-time low today, lol.
As is mine this is friday in "Mike World" and the BS with OD patient in the back that is "delirious" and calling my sweet coworkers **tches and everything else certaily could stand the old 5&2 in the leg if you know what i mean. We just had a nice chat me and him though and he is doing a bit better for now!! Come on 0800!
Oh, and apparently the door was open in the next room (there are 2 that separate the exam rooms, ours was closed, as always). I know my voice carries, you can hear a pin drop in that office, the insulation is so bad. I had made every effort NOT to yell, and did well, I thought, until my next patient (who is used to me and my views on compliance) walked in, sat down, and greeted me with..."I've been taking mine like I was supposed to."
Gotta love it.
LOL! That's what I call developing the proper patient response! Whatever happened to that training, or was it always only something they taught the doctors? I recall a friend who went to MD school in the early '80s and he'd come home and relate to me all this training that they got in how to make their patients pipe down and show some respect, and I was appalled by it! I can't help thinking that all of this "customer satisfaction" and service must be the opposite side of that pendulum swing.
Whatever happened to that training, or was it always only something they taught the doctors? I recall a friend who went to MD school in the early '80s and he'd come home and relate to me all this training that they got in how to make their patients pipe down and show some respect, and I was appalled by it! I can't help thinking that all of this "customer satisfaction" and service must be the opposite side of that pendulum swing.
carolmaccas66, BSN, RN
2,212 Posts
At least you gave me a laugh after an exhausting, tiring day and a very long job interview (got the job), where I had to do a complicated medication calculations exam! Thanks, it's just what I needed!
I also had a patient like this one night shift. She'd had shoulder surgery, whined the whole night (I didn't mind that so much), but she refused strong pain med's (except panadol), and wanted to make a complaint re the anaesthetist, which I had nothing to do with. I gave her a lot of my time that night & really tried to get her comfortable, but nothing was going to pacify her. I finally told her shoulder surgery HURTS - it's especially uncomfortable cos you can't GET comfortable, no matter how many pillows & slings you use, you have to sleep sitting up. I also told her I was neglecting my many other post-op patients due to her & she finally slept 4 a bit. I couldn't WAIT to get out the door that morning!