Not every family who visits is there to be supportive of the patient. Some of them are even downright unsupportive. Here are some of the worst visitors I've ever seen -- how about you?
There was the woman who'd had an aortic dissection repair, and things didn't go well. She had a perioperitive MI, a CVA and sepsis. All told, she was a patient in our ICU for six months. I didn't hear much about the patient's life from HER; she was confused and mostly nonverbal.
Her sister, however, sat at her bedside for hours and wanted to chat with the nurse. The sister, Katie, was a nice person and since I had just moved to the area, gave me a lot of tips about restaurants to try, where NOT to get your car repaired, and the like.
The HUSBAND, Milton, rarely showed up and when he did, he was the type of man who bellowed about "his rights" rather than understanding that when the patient is in CT (or having a line placed), the patient is unavailable for visitors, even of the spousal nature.
Katie put up pictures in the patient's room -- a smiling picture of her and her sister together, and multiple pictures of the patient's beloved dogs. "They're just like her children," Katie explained. "Milton never wanted children." Tellingly, there were no picture of Milton in the room.
He and Katie barely spoke and Katie told us that when Milton married her sister, he quit working and expected that she would support him, do all the cooking and cleaning and take care of his mother as well. As for the patient, she lit up whenever Katie arrived, but shut down whenever Milton did.
One weekend afternoon, Milton showed up just as I was helping the patient's nurse finish a bath and linen change. Without waiting for the two of us to finish up or get the dirty linen out of the way, Milton leaned over the bed and whispered (loudly enough for the patient and both of the nurses in the room to hear) "I killed your dogs. I said I would do it, and I did." That man has to take the prize for being ONE of the worst hospital visitors I've ever seen.
Years ago, when I worked in CCU, a 58 year old woman was admitted in cardiogenic shock. We placed a balloon pump, lined her, gave her multiple doses of morphine and finally, scheduled surgery for the following day. (The surgeon wanted to do it immediately, but there was already an emergency surgery in progress and the on call OR team were already in that OR.)
At six the next morning, I'm filling out the pre-op check list and a woman breezes in with two toddlers in tow. As I tried to explain to her that visitors under sixteen weren't allowed in the CCU, she told me that she had "just come to drop off her kids for their granny to watch."
Then there was the visitor who injected the patient with some street drug, right through the conveniently placed central line, because "Y'all don't give him none of the good stuff in here."
In a nursing home I worked at 10 years ago, I had one of "those" situations. There were three units, I usually works unit one. One of my patients was a type 1 diabetic. When she was well she didn't monitor her bs regularly. One day while returning home to her apartment with her bf, she passed out from hypoglycemia while walking up concrete stairs. She never regained consciousness. Sad story.
Her boyfriend would visit pretty often but would only sit with her a few moments then leave. One day, as I was pulled to unit 2, I figured out why he only visited a few moments. I walked into a patient's room and found the boyfriend in bed with that patient!
Never mind that in most states, I think that constitutes "public sex" if another person is unwillingly present . . . .so it was probably actually a crime.
Wow....Some vistors are just inconsiderate.At my facility this past week i had a pt and her boyfriend smoking and he was smoking throughout the facility.And he was passing her pills and drinking alcohol demanding food trays and was caught trying to break into vehicles outside.The supervisor would not call the police.
Specializes in burn ICU, SICU, ER, Trauma Rapid Response.
Wow....Some vistors are just inconsiderate.At my facility this past week i had a pt and her boyfriend smoking and he was smoking throughout the facility.And he was passing her pills and drinking alcohol demanding food trays and was caught trying to break into vehicles outside.The supervisor would not call the police.
I almost did.They said there were no guidelines to kick him out.I insisted they call our ceo and apparently dayshift had called the cops that day and they never showed up.
Nothing crazy so far, just the usual stealing food/linens/LCD screens (meant for vital signs...) or sleeping the same bed as well as taking showers at all of hours of the day. Who the hell comes to a hospital as a visitor to take a shower? Or comes to cuddle with their "friends"/
Last week I had a patient with an ammonia level above 100 getting enema version lactulose often who was virtually unresponsive with end stage live failure and acute hepatic encephalopathy. Family was ****** he wasn't getting his daily pie and proceeded to feed him (while NPO) when he couldn't even swallow.....
I have also seen my share of people who are so nasty I wouldn't even let them stay in my barn....
Ashamed to admit, the worst visitor I ever experienced was my own Wicked Stepmother, & to this day, I give credit to the many nurses who put up with her endless BS.
My dad went into the ER with SOB due to pneumonia after having a bout of influenza one year. Initially, it didn't seem too bad-Wicked had called me late that morning to tell me he was in the ER & was being admitted to a Med/Surg floor. She let me speak with the nurse, who stated he needed IV antibiotic & resp. support. Since everything seemed under control, I decided to go work my 3-11 shift that day.
About 3 hrs. into my shift, Wicked calls me at work, wanting me to have my dad transferred to the hospital I was working at. When I asked why, she claimed she ran into somebody she knew whose family member was there & this person had trashed the hospital on many levels, but had not come up with anything specific or serious. I explained I couldn't just have dad transferred, that if I did he would have to go thru the ER again because he didn't have an MD on staff in this hospital. I added I personally felt it best he stay where he was, because his MD was on staff there & that hospital was less than 10 minutes away from the Retirement facility they were both living at.
Eventually, dad had to transfer to ICU to be intubated-they had tried CPAP, then BiPAP, but he refused to cooperative with either. This prompted another call to me. What she was saying made no sense, so she let me speak to the MD, who said he felt vent support was needed for 24-48 hrs. This was on that Sat. night-by Tuesday, he was off the vent but not quite 24 hrs. later, started getting very compromised. They had to call a code & re-intubate. Later that week, they put in a trach to be able to remove the ET tube.
Wicked would get frustrated & upset with me when I didn't have an answer for something. I explained numerous times I had no critical care experience & required explanation from the drs & nurses sometimes to be able to understand what was happening. One day she was ******** at me when the nurse who frequently took my dad told her no nurse could be an expert at every type of nursing.
After about a month, they were not able to wean dad from the vent, although he could come off for a few hours during the daytime.
He was transferred to an LTAC on the same campus & that's when the problem really started. Wicked, of course, was used to ICU where the nurse usually only had one other pt, sometimes not even that, so was always very visible. The way the LTAC staffed was way beyond ridiculous & I saw that the first time I was there. All the nurses were very competent, caring & hard-working-they just had entirely too many very acute pts. Wicked would get upset when she'd turn on the call light & nobody came in a second or two.
If one of CNAs would answer the light, Wicked would expect them to drop everything & would get highly irate if the CNA explained what she wanted was something the nurse had to do & the nurse was busy with another pt. Wicked picked up the practice of just
walking up to the nurses' station, thinking that would get her what she wanted faster, then would get mad because if anybody was there, it was the unit secretary, who usually couldn't do what she wanted, anyway. I tried unsuccessfully & many times to explain all this, but Wicked was convinced these nurses were just lazy & incompetent.
From my perspective, I was so embarrassed for the way Wicked consistently acted, I usually made it a point to only visit in the evening, when I knew Wicked had gone home. I always thanked the nurses for everything they did & tried to help as much as I could.
I actually apologized to some of the nurses because Wicked was usually there all day, every day, making life very difficult for both my dad & the nurses. My dad was able to understand when I explained the difference between ICU & LTAC staffing & that sometimes a pt. had to wait for something because something more pressing had to be addressed.
After about 3 weeks on the LTAC, dad was successfully weaned off the vent, went to an acute rehab for 3 weeks, then returned to Assisted Living. Several years later, Wicked still p!sses & moans about how horrible the LTAC was & I don't even try to tell her the reality. Every day, I'm grateful to the nurses who took care of my dad during that illness & feel bad for all the crap they had to take off Wicked.
Sorry my post is long, but I thought it would be good for nurses to read about a problematic family member from a nurse's perspective.
Oh Mylanta!! And speaking of, I need to run and get some because I think my breakfast yogurt is going to make a reappearance!!! You have just won the thread
Had a patient admitted with stoma bleeding and inflammation. We eventually found out her husband liked the stomal sex... Yuck!
Wow....Some vistors are just inconsiderate.At my facility this past week i had a pt and her boyfriend smoking and he was smoking throughout the facility.And he was passing her pills and drinking alcohol demanding food trays and was caught trying to break into vehicles outside.The supervisor would not call the police.
Um, sure there is. It's called LAW. Breaking into a car would fall under that category. I'd be ticked to high heaven if my car was broken into and I later learned that a coworker watched and did nothing about it.
I almost did.They said there were no guidelines to kick him out.I insisted they call our ceo and apparently dayshift had called the cops that day and they never showed up.
NurseLady504
36 Posts
In a nursing home I worked at 10 years ago, I had one of "those" situations. There were three units, I usually works unit one. One of my patients was a type 1 diabetic. When she was well she didn't monitor her bs regularly. One day while returning home to her apartment with her bf, she passed out from hypoglycemia while walking up concrete stairs. She never regained consciousness. Sad story.
Her boyfriend would visit pretty often but would only sit with her a few moments then leave. One day, as I was pulled to unit 2, I figured out why he only visited a few moments. I walked into a patient's room and found the boyfriend in bed with that patient!
Wow...