The Great Double Standard?

Nurses Men

Published

I would like opinions from the rest of you guys. It seems everywhere I turn that there is this double standard that men nurses should not be providing care for any of women's intimate needs. I am still in nursing school, but it seems women nurses have no problem caring for either a male or female patient (students included), but men do not have that ability? I just don't quite understand this, when it is not even the patients perogative involved, just these female nurses who think they know "whats best". I would like this taboo to dissappear. Does anyone else see this? Any ideas who to remedy this issue and be able to call a nurse a nurse, and not a male or female nurse, each playing by different rules. I am pretty frustrated.

Specializes in Medical.

Back to the thread - I have to disagree with baila. While some women prefer female OB/GYN's many women are happy to have male physicians, or are more interested in the calibre of care delivered than in the gender of the person delivering it. While I agree that, as possible, patients preferences should be met, there's no reason why men can't be equally skilled, competent, caring and professional midwives as women. Any unit that uses that aspect alone to overlook a more qualified applicant is behaving immorally and bigotedly, particularly in the 21st century. If my former unit manager could train, and work, as a midwife in the '80s with no problem I think it's deplorable that other men are being told now that it's inappropriate, unworkable or somehow on par with a physical barrier to strong job performance. What a ridiculous analogy!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Cardiac.
Back to the thread - I have to disagree with baila. While some women prefer female OB/GYN's many women are happy to have male physicians, or are more interested in the calibre of care delivered than in the gender of the person delivering it. While I agree that, as possible, patients preferences should be met, there's no reason why men can't be equally skilled, competent, caring and professional midwives as women. Any unit that uses that aspect alone to overlook a more qualified applicant is behaving immorally and bigotedly, particularly in the 21st century. If my former unit manager could train, and work, as a midwife in the '80s with no problem I think it's deplorable that other men are being told now that it's inappropriate, unworkable or somehow on par with a physical barrier to strong job performance. What a ridiculous analogy!

very well said.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I work in an ED, and generally, males do male foleys and females do female foleys. Obviously traumas are different, but we like to keep it that way. When I worked on a floor, we had a male tech and he gave women baths and I gave men baths. He changed diapers on all his female patients. It was never a big deal.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

"Try these on for size:

"I don't want a black nurse." not ok - racism

"I don't want a gay nurse." not ok - discrimination

"I don't want a male nurse." oh, that's understandable, and we'll try to accommodate your preferences

Why is it ok to discriminate based on gender, while it is horrible to discriminate based on other criteria? "

I had to switch assignments before because of racist patients. They're paying thousands for their care and their caregivers don't need to feel awful because their patient is rude cause of their color... It's not like it happened only once either.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
]I guess my point is regardless of the patients wishes these female nurses are automatically assuming that we (for some reason?) should not be providing care.[/b']

Welcome to the wild wild world of nursing. A lot of females do not think we, as men we can control our animal instincts long enough to NOT derive some purient pleasure from slipping a foley into an 80 tear old female with a hip fracture.

Everyone says it is up to the patient to decide if they will allow a male nurse to take care of them.. OK..Fine..

What if a patient said they did not want an African- American to take care of them? Would there be such acceptance? Soo sexism is ok but racism is not...

It really wouldn't be an issue if the patient said they would be more comfortable with a females care, which wouldn't bother me at all, at least I can understand that. I have a big problem just accepting an answer that is "well thats just the way it is"

You are a student nurse? You might just want to get used to hearing that answer. Many things in nursing are justified by that answer.... it's called nursing dogma...

If all people accepted that as an answer, women wouldn't be able to vote, and african americans wouldn't have equal rights. I know these examples are extreme but I really hate this distinction that males can only do " ..." while females can do it all. What can be done to change this?

Good Luck.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

As a male that is only looking into a nursing career, this is actually one of the things that I have been weighing. I havent read through all the postings in this thread so please forgive me if someone has already made this point. But for me the main thing about performing nursing duties on a female patient would be the possible legal ramifications. I have had several friends that are in various roles such as nursing, teaching, police, EMT, etc. where you basically have to consider the fact that the person you are trying to help may try to come back later and accuse you of innappropriate behavior. And even if you manage to prove your innocence you still have that stigma attached. honestly, this is the one thing that scares the hell out of me about becoming a nurse.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

So far I have been lucky. I'm currently a "new" RN and back in my clinicals I was turned away by several patients, mainly during my OB rotation.

I now work in a LTC and have been getting to know all my patients and letting them know me. I started small with answering bathroom call lights and assisting them with hygiene and normally they were so happy someone actually came to assist them that there was no question of me being male. I always explain what procedure I am doing beforehand if it involves exposing them, peri care, skin checks, caths, etc. Slowly my patients are accepting me. The only time I get a strange look is from the family members, and I believe it is not because I am male, it is because I am new to them and they have been told I am a new nurse so they watch me like a hawk when I care for their loved ones, which I fully welcome. It gets a little tedious..but one patient at a time..one family member at a time..I am winning them over to the fact that I am a nurse who provides good care. Now if I can only get a few of my aides to consider me as a nurse and not as some martian that has started working on their unit I'll be happy.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Pediatric Critical Care.

It's just like any other issue: race, sex, disabilities, age...

Now that everyone is "treated equal" (which I am glad it is), it seems they overcompensate for the past. Women are now doing jobs that traditionally men do, but Lord forbid someone say something to them; but let a guy do a job that traditionally women do, anyone can say anything they want and get away with it.

Same with race: how many times have you been to a store where all the employees are of the same race (other than white)? Many times. But if someone hires all white people, it's discrimination. Just my observation and opinion...

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in RN.
I would like opinions from the rest of you guys. It seems everywhere I turn that there is this double standard that men nurses should not be providing care for any of women's intimate needs. I am still in nursing school, but it seems women nurses have no problem caring for either a male or female patient (students included), but men do not have that ability? I just don't quite understand this, when it is not even the patients perogative involved, just these female nurses who think they know "whats best". I would like this taboo to dissappear. Does anyone else see this? Any ideas who to remedy this issue and be able to call a nurse a nurse, and not a male or female nurse, each playing by different rules. I am pretty frustrated.

Agree 100%

I understand if someone specifically asks. But to apply a "rule" is to ASSUME that I as a professional have ill intentions when behind closed doors with a female patient AND it is assuming that ALL women have an "issue" with male providers! It makes me sick. I guess we are to conclude that ALL men are animals and ALL women are perfect little angels...That's a real funny joke there!!! How tragic and cumbersome for our profession..

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Pediatrics, ER.

I am currently a senior nursing student and was recently DENIED access to an OB rotation because I was a male. I spoke with some of the other nursing students about this (I am one of 2 men in my graduating class) and all the women were in agreement that men knew nothing about what women were going through during a pregnancy and eventual birth. This confused me because

1. None of these women have had a child either so clearly they have no idea what a woman is going through during pregnancy.

and

2. Isn't that what nursing is? Caring for those who are ill?? I mean I personally have never experienced severe head trauma, being on a ventilator, being cathed, or having to go through chemotherapy. BUT I have cared for patients who have and was told I did a tremendous job. I am going to school to LEARN how to care for patients with multiple illnesses and injuries I myself have never experienced.

I guess it just angered me a little that these women believe I get turned on or something like that from watching a birth. Clearly I wouldn't be a successful (soon to be) nurse if I was turned on by all of my female patients. Any thoughts or comments on this people? I just want to know why it is viewed as ok for women to care for a man, but a man cannot care for a pre/post-partum woman?

Up Vote Up Vote ×
I am currently a senior nursing student and was recently DENIED access to an OB rotation because I was a male.

Depends..if you were turned away by the nursing staff of the OB, your preceptor, or your school clinical liason I'd be po'd as hell. They are doing you are great disservice and a terrible turn for nursing as well and I'd say as much, I'd shame them until next week.

Now..if it was due to patient "choice" which I ran into during my OB rotation...not much you can do about that. I had several patients refuse me as their student nurse but at least that day I would still get experience in nicu or the nursery, or even post partum so it wasn't a total loss. Fortunately for me I did have two p[atients who actually sought me out because they heard about the male nurse being denied the opportunity to care for active labor patients. Because of those two selfless women I was able to be in on a V-birth (twins!) and 1 c-section.

Worse come to worse if you are denied any part of OB (and yes it isnt fair) make it work to your advantage...see if those days they can get you into another unit that you may actually be interested in. Another guy in my class had so many female ob pts dny him that he finnaly walked down to the ER and asked a PA if he could hang out there and the preceptor okay'd it. If I had been given a choice I would have gladly skipped OB (saw 3 of my own kids born so no great loss of experience) to go to an oncology unit, psych, or a geriatric care unit.

Hope all works out for ya.

Big J

Up Vote Up Vote ×
I would like opinions from the rest of you guys. It seems everywhere I turn that there is this double standard that men nurses should not be providing care for any of women's intimate needs. I am still in nursing school, but it seems women nurses have no problem caring for either a male or female patient (students included), but men do not have that ability? I just don't quite understand this, when it is not even the patients perogative involved, just these female nurses who think they know "whats best". I would like this taboo to dissappear. Does anyone else see this? Any ideas who to remedy this issue and be able to call a nurse a nurse, and not a male or female nurse, each playing by different rules. I am pretty frustrated.

Since this was originally posted in 2006, I'm interested to know what your experience is now, considering you should be graduated by this time with some nursing experience.

As for the original post, I work in the ED and never experience this from female nurses. If anything, the opposite happens where the male nurses will ask the females to do their foleys or peri care for them, sometimes without the patient even requesting it because the guys just assume that the female patients won't want them to do it.

This gets old and annoying when we have our own patients to care for and have to take time away from them to do a procedure that the guys should be able to do. I started handling this by telling them that I'd be happy to do their foley for them if they will do x, y, or z for one of my patients while I do the foley. If they have made a legitimate request, this helps us both out and it puts the cabosh on unnecessary requests.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Add a Comment