Published Feb 12, 2014
SDALPN
997 Posts
I work a case here and there. Its 10 hour shifts. Its already boring because the kid only has a feeding tube. Not my kind of case, but I need the hours. The mom is retired and is about 70 years old. Her generation is different than ours. She doesn't allow nurses to use cell phones, bring tablets/laptops. A nurse had her cell die and she plugged it in without asking to be able to make emergency calls and she let the nurse go for not asking to charge her phone. This mom brags about letting nurses go. She lets nurses go over silly things. The office staff even has made comments about how picky she is. So to top that off, the only thing for the kid to watch (kid blind and deaf) is DVDs of wheel of fortune, cash cab, and teletubbies. They have cable, but claim the kid doesn't like TV. 10 hours is too long to be stuck doing nothing like that. If there was more to do with the kid, I wouldn't care. Oh yeah, and she has a camera and sits watching the monitor all day. Any thoughts on how I can get her to let us watch something other than wheel of fortune reruns? Or even phone use? Right now, I just drink lots so I can take frequent bathroom breaks to check phone and break up my day. The mom likes me, but I know that could change quickly. Can't trust her at all. She told me if I would do nights that I could "test out the recliner and that 4,5,6 hours of sleep can really make you feel refreshed". I declined. I don't do nights and don't sleep. Any suggestions on things I can do to avoid boredom?
caliotter3
38,333 Posts
Sounds like she has you over the barrel. I would start out with activities for the child, revolving around the child. Like tactile stimulation, then maybe you could branch out down the road. But frankly, I would be looking for the next opportunity.
Sounds like she has you over the barrel. I would start out with activities for the child revolving around the child. Like tactile stimulation, then maybe you could branch out down the road. But frankly, I would be looking for the next opportunity.[/quote']I only work there once every week or two. Kid hates to be touched or messed with. He only lays there and moans sometimes. Can't really do much. I could deal with it fine if I had something to do. The pt is too big to hold, but we transfer to w/c sometimes. They don't have a lift. Its just odd. Of course, as I've always said about parents that watch a camera monitor all day...if they have that much time to watch the monitor and come in to complain about things, they have time to do the job themselves. But it means I have to do everything exactly the way she wants. The way she does most things isn't bad and there is logic behind her way. But its lots of pressure, knowing I'm being watched. I sit behind the camera when I can. But she comes in often. I would cover more shifts if she would let us bring in something to do or let us watch something different. I asked her the other day if he could watch nickelodeon or nick jr and was told no.
I only work there once every week or two. Kid hates to be touched or messed with. He only lays there and moans sometimes. Can't really do much. I could deal with it fine if I had something to do. The pt is too big to hold, but we transfer to w/c sometimes. They don't have a lift. Its just odd. Of course, as I've always said about parents that watch a camera monitor all day...if they have that much time to watch the monitor and come in to complain about things, they have time to do the job themselves. But it means I have to do everything exactly the way she wants. The way she does most things isn't bad and there is logic behind her way. But its lots of pressure, knowing I'm being watched. I sit behind the camera when I can. But she comes in often. I would cover more shifts if she would let us bring in something to do or let us watch something different. I asked her the other day if he could watch nickelodeon or nick jr and was told no.
mluvsgnc
178 Posts
Would she be open to you doing a more "old school" type of activity, like a crossword puzzle or word search? How about reading a newspaper? Solitaire?
Would she be open to you doing a more "old school" type of activity like a crossword puzzle or word search? How about reading a newspaper? Solitaire?[/quote']I wondered about that. We can't read a book, so I doubt that would be an option. But even that would be nice to be able to do. One of the nurses I trained is going to school and asked me if she would let her study. I told her I didn't know and she would have to ask. I also warned her how the parent is. I'm wondering if there is a way to change her view. But this is a parent that calls the feeding tube his lifeline. She tells me every time I'm there about the one time the tube got pulled out and how she thinks the nurse lied about how it came out. She told me she has the teacher spy on the nurse and report back to her and that the teacher said she didn't see the incident. But the parent acts like it was a much bigger deal than it really is. So I'm not sure there is much of a chance of changing her view on anything.
I wondered about that. We can't read a book, so I doubt that would be an option. But even that would be nice to be able to do. One of the nurses I trained is going to school and asked me if she would let her study. I told her I didn't know and she would have to ask. I also warned her how the parent is.
I'm wondering if there is a way to change her view. But this is a parent that calls the feeding tube his lifeline. She tells me every time I'm there about the one time the tube got pulled out and how she thinks the nurse lied about how it came out. She told me she has the teacher spy on the nurse and report back to her and that the teacher said she didn't see the incident. But the parent acts like it was a much bigger deal than it really is. So I'm not sure there is much of a chance of changing her view on anything.
Blackcat99
2,836 Posts
I would not like to work where there is a camera. The mother sounds like she enjoys the power of getting rid of nurses whenever she feels like it. Hope you can find something better soon.
The camera is only on the kid. So I stay behind it. Yeah, she definitely has control issues. Its only to give me extra hours when I don't get enough floating. And there have been times where they put another nurse on my shift and send me to a more complex case because another nurse can't do those cases, but can do the basic case. So I put up with it for the hours when necessary. But I'd just like to make it a little less painful than hearing/seeing wheel of fortune reruns. 10 hours of that too often will give me a free trip to a padded room!
CloudySue
710 Posts
Sounds like she gets satisfaction from torturing others. She knows the kid is blind/deaf, so she insists on the most awful videos imaginable? And refuse to let you actually do anything? What do you actually do, just sit and twiddle your thumbs? I'm sorry you have to be at this case at all. I had a similar case that I filled in briefly for 4 hours/day, and I couldn't stand that. The slow pace was excruciating.
4give&4getoften
23 Posts
maybe be honest and tell her you can't fill in any longer because doing nothing is torture. Ask her why reading a book is not allowed? If you are there right by the child and can respond to his needs what is the big deal?! I agree with the others...sounds like a control issue and I personally could not deal with that type of control.
Good luck and keep us posted:)
cazach0122
47 Posts
That's absolutely ridiculous you can't even read a book. I would have to ask for a different case... 10 hours of doing nothing is absolute torture!
I like 4give's idea of explaining to the mom of why you can't continue. It gives her a chance to reconsider her views (even though it sounds like she probably won't).
ceebeejay
389 Posts
That is horrid. These types of personalities are the only thing I do not like about Private Duty. There is almost not way to work with someone like that, except as someone else said, ask her for rationals and address them. But, it seems like she will just "fire" you anyway for asking.
eeffoc_emmig
305 Posts
My suggestion would be to find another case. I won't work a case in which I can't use my phone, read or watch TV. I have to have something to do during the downtime. She sounds like nothing but trouble.