straddling the fence

[tokmom, BSN, RN]

How does one that is a charge nurse straddle the fence between management and being a staff member? Our hospital never had this position until approx 8 months ago, when I and another nurse stepped into the role full time. Managment pulls us into many meetings and gives us a lot of responsibility, other than a simple charge nurse position. The other nurse and I are feeling a bit alienated by the other nurses. They seem ok, until we have to give them a patient or give them some mild remprimand for various things. Let's just say my facebook friends are dwindling! One nurse told my co worker that she wasn't a 'real' charge nurse. Whatever that meant. (yes it was reported to management that alienates my co worker even more)

I'm not a thin skinned person, but when you get dumped or completely ignored by some of your co workers (and not just for the day) for giving them a patient, it gets pretty old. Believe it or not, my manager is turning into my friend. The other charge and I can only vent to each other about a bad work day. Sunday night is our phone night.

Any advice? We don't gossip about others, and try to be positive in our role and role models.

[Chin up]

You will get over it and so will they. Eventually they begin to follow your leadership, once you start to lead. You stepped up into this role and owe your employer a leader. Become one, set expectations, be consistent, be fair, and play no favorites. Please dont try to win them over by pleasing. It never works, you look phony and they won't respect you. Do your job, and they will accept it. Peace!

[tokmom, BSN, RN]

Thanks for your advice. I really do hope they come around. We do lead, I think that is the part they do not like, lol. My manager is very happy with my performance and tells me so repeatedly. This of course makes me more a target and the nurses call me a 'kiss up'. I just tell them I'm doing my job.

As for playing favorites, it probably comes across as though I am. I do ask about families, kids, and outside lives of course. At least those that will answer my questions. The silent ones of course won't answer at all.

[mindlor]

I have never been a charge nurse, however I have been a manager and have a degree in management.....

That said...the Golden Rule works great. When having to correct people do so in a private setting and do so from a position of concern and kindness and teaching.

However, spend much more time looking for good things people do. Try calling a nurse into your office, sit them down and say...ya know what, I saw you do this and it was AWESOME!!! GREAT JOB.....

People love positive feedback....

Also, when you think management is wrong, be sure to stick up for your staff if they know you have their back, they will certainly have yours....

[canesdukegirl, BSN, RN]

Hey tok-

I SO know what you mean! I found that the friends that I thought I had while a staff nurse seemed to view me differently when I first became charge. I suppose that they thought that I would not give them any assignments simply because I was their friend. Ummm....huh? I love ya, dude, but we are working, and I just happen to be the one giving out assignments. They seem to take it personally when I have to give them another assignment. I HATE that feeling.

When I have to deny a staff member's request to let them go home early and we are already short staffed, they won't speak to me for weeks. When I give them an off-service assignment because it is their turn, they blow up at me and tell me that they are the only ones that EVER have to go off service. When I hand out lunch assignments to our afternoon/evening staff, I always get push back because they think that their lunch assignments are the WORST!

I think the hardest part of being in the role of charge is getting over hurt feelings when staff accuse you of picking on them. As if that is our goal when we are in charge..."Let's see, hmmm...since it is so SLOW today, I think I will pick out my target to see how much hell I can give them. Eeeniee meeenie miiinie moe." It is beyond ridiculous. I have just learned that you can't please everyone. I am so mindful of each person's load for the day, and what kind of week they have been having. I plan assignments based on skill level, fairness and I keep in mind each person's tolerance level regarding which other staff they are assigned to. They have no idea how much thought I put into making assignments, and some of them complain anyway. I feel so beat up by the end of the day. No matter how much effort I put into making assignments fair, I know that I can't make everyone happy. I just had to accept this and continue to do my best.

There is a book on amazon.com called A Charge Nurse's Guide: Navigating the Path of Leadership. From the snapshot of chapters, it seems to be resourceful.

I can totally empathize with you. The longer you do charge, the easier it will be. It is getting there that is the tough part.

[Chin up]

I have never been a charge nurse, however I have been a manager and have a degree in management.....

That said...the Golden Rule works great. When having to correct people do so in a private setting and do so from a position of concern and kindness and teaching.

However, spend much more time looking for good things people do. Try calling a nurse into your office, sit them down and say...ya know what, I saw you do this and it was AWESOME!!! GREAT JOB.....

People love positive feedback....

Also, when you think management is wrong, be sure to stick up for your staff if they know you have their back, they will certainly have yours....

Very good advice!

People do love positive feedback, in fact I find they will start bending over backwards for you, when you let them know they are doing well. As long as it is true, please do. We all need this. Peace!

[Jolie, BSN]

You don't straddle the fence, because you don't belong on their side anymore.

I think a better reference would be a ladder. You are now a rung up from your staff nurse friends and colleagues. You are a rung down from upper level management. You are no longer on par with your staff and you need to change your mindset a bit in order to make that work effectively. And you are not in the same club as your superiors, either, but should be able to work closely and communicate freely with them. There are new boundaries.

It's kind of like moving away from your high school friends, then going back to visit a year later. They may politely welcome you for lunch, but you're no longer part of their group. Or they may give you a very hard time for moving to the rival high school and not be very nice to you.

Doesn't matter how they respond. It's your job to set the tone by providing leadership. That's the tough part, because most health care organizations do a **** poor job of preparing employees for leadership roles.

A few guidelines that I learned over the years:

Lean who key people are in your hospital, and introduce yourself. Network with them. You will need their assistance at times, and it helps to be acquainted.

Don't try to implement change right away, unless there is a clear safety issue.

Continue to work the floor as a staff nurse at least once per week. Rotate shifts and work an occasional weekend and holiday so you are visible and available to all staff members.

Speak privately and promptly to employees needing counseling. Speak publically and profusely about employees who do well.

Schedule fairly. Fix schedule and payroll mistakes immediately. Don't ever ask an employee to wait until the next check for a correction that wasn't their fault.

Don't ask an employee to do anything that you haven't done yourself first, or are at least capable and willing to do.

Don't make promises that you don't have the authority to keep.

As much as we all hate them, do employee evaluations on time and face to face.

Insist on regular meeting with your superior so that you are kept up to date on happenings in your facility and have regular feedback on your performance.

With time, you will learn who your "pals" are and then you can begin to make subtle changes and improvements by utilizing them as role models.

You will realize even more quicly who your "troublemakers" are. Address them in private when you have a clear cut example of how they are attempting to undermine you. Have HR present.

Don't worry about facebook. It's more trouble that it's worth :)

[Argo]

The advice given above is excellent .... what I have learned about being in charge.... I did it for a few years and found it not to be worth the "extra money" typical charge pay is $1/hr more in my area... no thanks. It was a great learning experience and I wouldn't change a thing. I chose the route of specialized areas. They pay significantly more. The extra call pay for specialty teams way more than covers it. I get called 100x less when im not at work. I much prefer my heart call to my admin call, which im on this week, because im so infrequently called for emergency hearts but get called all day and night for admin duties. I also hate baby sitting adults all freaking day...

[mindlor]

Spoken as a true Manager Jolie, I would love to work under your leadership :)

[leslie :-D]

oh my gosh...so much excellent advice here.

jolie...wow.

the bottom line is, you need to find that balance betw fair and firm.

and it'll take awhile, for sure.

it's one of those type jobs where you are laid off or quit or terminated...

and it's only then, the staff will talk amongst ea other, and agree that "she really was fair to all of us, and i respected her."

but up until that point, it'll never feel good enough and feels like a lose/lose.

i've rejected a few mgmt positions, knowing that it sucks being in the middle.

i much rather be an indian, and defer the chief's position to someone who has leather for skin.

sorry if i'm not encouraging...i really do sympathize w/you.

stay true to yourself and your ideals, and blow the rest away.

win/win.

lesie

[netglow, ASN, RN]

Jolie, that post of yours is going in my "keeper" folder, for sure!

[tokmom, BSN, RN]

Hey tok-

I SO know what you mean! I found that the friends that I thought I had while a staff nurse seemed to view me differently when I first became charge. I suppose that they thought that I would not give them any assignments simply because I was their friend. Ummm....huh? I love ya, dude, but we are working, and I just happen to be the one giving out assignments. They seem to take it personally when I have to give them another assignment. I HATE that feeling.

When I have to deny a staff member's request to let them go home early and we are already short staffed, they won't speak to me for weeks. When I give them an off-service assignment because it is their turn, they blow up at me and tell me that they are the only ones that EVER have to go off service. When I hand out lunch assignments to our afternoon/evening staff, I always get push back because they think that their lunch assignments are the WORST!

I think the hardest part of being in the role of charge is getting over hurt feelings when staff accuse you of picking on them. As if that is our goal when we are in charge..."Let's see, hmmm...since it is so SLOW today, I think I will pick out my target to see how much hell I can give them. Eeeniee meeenie miiinie moe." It is beyond ridiculous. I have just learned that you can't please everyone. I am so mindful of each person's load for the day, and what kind of week they have been having. I plan assignments based on skill level, fairness and I keep in mind each person's tolerance level regarding which other staff they are assigned to. They have no idea how much thought I put into making assignments, and some of them complain anyway. I feel so beat up by the end of the day. No matter how much effort I put into making assignments fair, I know that I can't make everyone happy. I just had to accept this and continue to do my best.

There is a book on amazon.com called A Charge Nurse's Guide: Navigating the Path of Leadership. From the snapshot of chapters, it seems to be resourceful.

I can totally empathize with you. The longer you do charge, the easier it will be. It is getting there that is the tough part.

OMG, exactly!!!! I take a long while doing the assigments because I do what you do. But someone isn't usually happy because they might have one more patient then the other nurse. Yet the other one has a very high acuity and the whiner has walkie talkies! I'm over that now, but every once in a while it does sting. Like I said, my FB friends are dwindling just because I gave a patient at 1300. Three hours prior to the shift being over.

It is such childish behavior, you know?

Thanks for the book idea. I'm heading to Amazon to order it.