Jump to content

Stop the drama

Has 52 years experience. Specializes in Trauma, ER, ICU, CCU, PACU, GI, Cardiology, OR.

stopping the drama at work among nurses, doctors, and other staff members. with that said, does anyone has suggestions on how they deal with such "drama"? or situations that they can share regarding this issue.

madwife2002, BSN, RN

Has 26 years experience. Specializes in RN, BSN, CHDN.

Drama! I absolutely hate drama at work yet it is a common as breathing! Everything is a drama and I have spent 2 years of my life managing a facility where I have tried to stop the drama.

Some months I am fortunate and there is no drama the next month it is like the whole place has exploded into a soap opera!

Sometimes it is a lethal combination of staff which increases the chance of drama, sometimes it is gossiping about another member of staff and sometimes it is just the 'full moon syndrome'

I too am interested to hear how places dissolve the drama?

Lovely_RN, MSN

Has 11 years experience.

How about not allowing yourself to be sucked into it? As far as interactions with my co-workers go I have on horseblinders. I know they talk about me behind my back but I pretend not to notice. I was taking report one day and another nurse was standing right behind my back talking about me to another nurse. I heard her but I didn't acknowledge her. Getting through the shift sucks enough out of me. I don't need to add to my stress by giving my precious energy to losers who make the job the center of their lives. It's too bad that I don't like the people I work with more than I do but hey I just work there. I don't live there and I don't really know or care about them anyway. I show up do my best and go home...that is all. I'm grateful I have a good job and my bills are paid. That's what really matters.

TheCommuter, BSN, RN

Has 14 years experience. Specializes in Case mgmt., rehab, (CRRN), LTC & psych.

It is very difficult to be affected by workplace drama if one has developed some emotional detachment from their overly dramatic coworkers.

People tend to stop dramatizing things when they do not have an audience for their crazy-making. Do not react as if you are interested in the drama, and do not be an audience member.

Ignore it. Not saying, ignoring them because they are our co-workers. But, I just prefer to not get involved in such drama. Unless someone is asking me for some advice about something, I just prefer to stay out of it. If it isn't my problem or if it doesn't concern myself, why worry about it. Most times, there is nothing that I could say or do that would solve the problem or change anyone's minds. Its not that I don't care, because I do. But, why risk getting involved and getting in trouble over something that may or may not be trivial. To me, its just not worth it. If people can work it out for themselves and with each other, more power to them.

I have perfected an "Are you kidding me/an idiot?" look whenever someone tries to pull me into the soap opera loving life. They see that I have zero interest in their theatrics and move on to someone who does get off on it.

I have a coworker who is a drama queen! She loves to pick on the weekend staff and tell us how everything is done better during the weekdays. LOL I walk away and do my job as it should be done. She has just been promoted to a managerial position. I wish my employer the best of luck with that! Haha. She should get her own reality show. She definitely can't go without enormous amounts of attention!

Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN

Has 40 years experience. Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.

As a manager I realized that there are going to be those who will be your drama queens/kings. There are those who love to stir the pot. There are those who are your anchors and those who anchor you down....and then there are those that you can't get motivated/involved for anything but lunch or payday. Kind of like AN.....;)

The real key is getting them to play nice in the sand box. I had a "female dog" complaint box. I had a drama complaint box. I had a real concern/patient safety box and a whining box for the employees to voice their opinions and feelings. But I had bigger prettier kudos box. I made it very clear that I tolerated NO pettiness or back stabbing and if they had nothing nice to say they were to say nothing at all. All complaints had to be written to the box first....then if it was still important they had to submit, in writing, to schedule their session...I mean discussion at a later date, when rational thought returns.

I had a strict DO NOT ENGAGE/RETAILIATE POLICY under the umbrella of professional conduct. I made it very clear that you don't have to like someone to work with them. Working a shift is NOT having them over to your house for dinner. If they were good to their patients , practiced safe nursing/medicine..it doesn't matter that you don't like their hair or the way they chew gum. I made a physical presence on ALL shifts regularly and participated actively in patient care when possible/needed so I could witness/stop drama in it's track. AND I had a case of "put your big girl/boy paties on" in my office.

It's exhausting at first but worth it in the end.

After making them actually confront each other and calling them out in front of their peers......they finally decided that if it wasn't going to matter in a hundred years. It doesn't matter now......as long as the patients are safe and cared for. I always believed that a department that plays together stays together and got the doc's to belly up some cash so we could do booze, I mean dinner cruises and let our hair down. Cook outs and summer games on the back deck worked wonders.

But somewhere along the way you have to acknowledge that what they are feeling while may seem real.....it isn't a matter of life or death. When you are surrounded by drama....life, death, illness, loss.....drama is as much apart of daily life as brushing your teeth or breathing air. It's what you do with that energy that counts.

I think that in today's economy there are additional stresses. "Senior management" are brow beat.......I mean pressuring the managers and staff with unrealistic expectations. Insurance companies are squeezing the MD's. This tinkles right down to the staff and the sniping begins so I think it is more difficult right now. Bring the offending parties together in a neutral area and let them hash it out and then let them all know ......this ends today and will not be tolerated during work hours.

Ahhh...the good ole days....I'm going to take a nap I'm exhausted:lol2: .Good luck Gitano!!!:hug:

GitanoRN, BSN, MSN, RN

Has 52 years experience. Specializes in Trauma, ER, ICU, CCU, PACU, GI, Cardiology, OR.

at this level, i have given serious thought on handling the situation like esme12 has posted, just let them go at it and let it all come out in the wash and let be bygones be bygones. for example today the first thing @ 5:30am i receive a call that two night nurses and a female doctor got into an altercation in front of the pt. and their family. in addition, 5 nurses call out sick and one declines to come in if so & so is in-charge. in addition, one cna & an lpn in med/surg. haven't been able to hatch their differences since they had a few words several months ago, plus the cna won't take any orders from the lpn. furthermore, i have to deal with 3 prima-donna's nm that don't seem to realize that the good old days are gone and we have to move forward, so they have decided to do their own thing when it comes to managing their staff after several personal counseling. oh! let's not forget one of the evening pharmacist has a retraining order on one of my nurses because she claims that the nurse is having an affair with her husband, and calls the nm's every day to find out if the nurse in question is scheduled to work when her husband is on duty at the out/pt. pharmacy. needless to say, i felt like calling in myself :madface:. however, i went on my daily jog, and the palms swaying plus the sounds of the beach calmed me and gave me a new perspective on the matter. unquestionably, now you know what brought up this post. wishing all the drama queens/kings the best wherever their facility may be.....aloha~

nursel56

Has 33 years experience. Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.

Esme and Gitano, I'd love to have either of you as manager. "Whining box" :lol2:

How about not allowing yourself to be sucked into it? As far as interactions with my co-workers go I have on horseblinders. I know they talk about me behind my back but I pretend not to notice.

I do this, too. I also learned to never repeat any of the drama stories I heard from others, no matter how juicy they were or how much I disliked the person who was the star of the day. I know the next day it will be me, and the concept of loyalty doesn't seem to apply to the workplace. I've had to think or say, "I thought you were my friend!" too many times to avoid being cynical about that.

But -- I don't scold or frown at the tale-tellers. I just don't add anything and try to continue with whatever I'm doing. Doing the finger wagging won't change anything anyway. Hats off to all the nurse managers!

Scarlette Wings

Has 27 years experience. Specializes in M/S, ICU, ICP.

I stayed so busy with the patients or charting that I could never figure out why there were so many nurses/aids/whatevers sitting at the nurses station chatting. They figured I was a loner, stuck up,or just plain odd. I figured I was there to tend to my patients and not them. I spoke if I had to and didn't really talk to anyone except my patients until after my first med pass. I am there to do my job, not socialize and backstab.

malamud69, ADN, BSN, EMT-B

Has 10 years experience. Specializes in Emergency.

Drama...It exists everywhere humans interact. I do as someone very wise once said...do my job and keep my mouth shut. Let the weeds weed themselves out. They always do. Sooner or later people interacting on a middle school level cannot survive the reality of adult human interaction. So let them have their little petty games and move on to the business of helping people.

BrandonLPN, LPN

Has 5 years experience.

I look at all the drama as free amusement. Just don't get involved and bring some popcorn!

GitanoRN, BSN, MSN, RN

Has 52 years experience. Specializes in Trauma, ER, ICU, CCU, PACU, GI, Cardiology, OR.

i look at all the drama as free amusement. just don't get involved and bring some popcorn!

i totally agree with you that's the attitude i sported when i was a staff nurse, however, when you're the upper management you can't dismiss the situation when it reaches you there's no escaping the "soap opera drama" therefore, one has to act and find a solution to accommodate everyone without adding more fuel to the fire, i have always said to my staff "we don't have to like each other, but while we are here we need to get along with one another" :cool:

Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN

Has 40 years experience. Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.

at this level, i have given serious thought on handling the situation like esme12 has posted, just let them go at it and let it all come out in the wash and let be bygones be bygones. for example today the first thing @ 5:30am i receive a call that two night nurses and a female doctor got into an altercation in front of the pt. and their family. in addition, 5 nurses call out sick and one declines to come in if so & so is in-charge. in addition, one cna & an lpn in med/surg. haven't been able to hatch their differences since they had a few words several months ago, plus the cna won't take any orders from the lpn. furthermore, i have to deal with 3 prima-donna's nm that don't seem to realize that the good old days are gone and we have to move forward, so they have decided to do their own thing when it comes to managing their staff after several personal counseling. oh! let's not forget one of the evening pharmacist has a restraining order on one of my nurses because she claims that the nurse is having an affair with her husband, and calls the nm's every day to find out if the nurse in question is scheduled to work when her husband is on duty at the out/pt. pharmacy. needless to say, i felt like calling in myself :madface:.however, i went on my daily jog, and the palms swaying plus the sounds of the beach calmed me and gave me a new perspective on the matter. unquestionably, now you know what brought up this post. wishing all the drama queens/kings the best wherever their facility may be.....aloha~

i'm so sorry gitano.....i can't stop laughing. i know it's not really funny.....but it is real funny!!!! that's what you get for living on an island in the middle of the ocean. it reminds me of a small hospital i once managed....it was the sister outlier to a larger facility that was the trauma center...on the coast of ma....a fishing village. if any of you guys recognize this......how ya doin? :hug:

the whole town's related. one nurse was fooling around with the others husband who was the uncle's brothers in law......twice removed by marriage.:bugeyes: you know the drill.

one night they kept paging me to fight because they weren't on speaking terms with each other.:banghead: i finally had enough...in my best "i'm not putting up with this crap" mommy voice i told them to stick their heads out the window and shout as it was a more effective means of communication than paging me and if i had to come down there i was going sell tickets and make them duke it out in the parking lot while the town watched because i was sick of their pretty crap.

this is a union facility and i told them......don't make me start progressive discipline because we all know where that will lead!! ( i'm easy...if you behave). days off no pay. suspension. bye bye.

the sick calls. i would discipline. the petulant "i won't work with her" i'd give her an option of a different shift (nights) so they won't cross paths.....or they could act like the grown up professionals that they claim to be and knock it off!!!! those managers need to have an account set up on an so they can read how hard it is to find a job right now and since there are several applicant for every position.....you'd be happy to set up their severance package. that md would be in my office with the medical director and a serious discussion as to conduct becoming a professional.

are you new to this position? the may be puttin on a show. you initially need to make it clear without being aggressive...clear and concise.......and when you follow through as promised.....hopefully they will behave. i have very confidence you'll do fine.

if not indulge on large amounts of adult beverages. :hug:

MN-Nurse, ASN, RN

Specializes in Med Surg - Renal.

There will always be drama.

There will also always be a choice on whether you want to participate in it or escalate it.

GitanoRN, BSN, MSN, RN

Has 52 years experience. Specializes in Trauma, ER, ICU, CCU, PACU, GI, Cardiology, OR.

i'm so sorry gitano.....i can't stop laughing. i know it's not really funny.....but it is real funny!!!! that's what you get for living on an island in the middle of the ocean. it reminds me of a small hospital i once managed....it was the sister outlier to a larger facility that was the trauma center...on the coast of ma....a fishing village. if any of you guys recognize this......how ya doin? :hug:

are you new to this position? the may be puttin on a show. you initially need to make it clear without being aggressive...clear and concise.......and when you follow through as promised.....hopefully they will behave. i have very confidence you'll do fine.

if not indulge on large amounts of adult beverages. :hug:

in answer to your question no i'm not new to the position, i been in this facility since 2000. however, this has been going on and off for a while, i look back now after the events and now i can laugh on my own without letting them know how up-set they made me i feel at times. therefore, when i make my rounds i walk with a sour face and everyone seems to be in their best behavior. unquestionably, is like i'm dealing with kids! heck some kids behave better than these professionals. once again, i thank you for your concern on how i'm doing...as a matter a fact a couple of friends just invited me over to go to the "aloha tower" and have a couple of drinks, i called my baby sitter and told her that i will be late, so i told my friends that i'll be there if i'm late to start without me but to order me a tall zombie :D

tri-rn

Specializes in MICU/SICU.

Gitano, I don't quite understand what position you hold exactly but I do NOT envy you. Well, ok, except the palm trees and surf while you run. Here it's birds and...well, birds :)

There's always 1-800-call Maury.......

Frustrating for sure. Amazing when you want people to act like grown-ups and take care of patients, already....

Been there,done that, ASN, RN

Has 33 years experience.

No DRAMA allowed. As a manager, you will be calling the definition of drama.

I am sure there are situations that require your call. And, there are the facilities policies that will support what ever call you make.

Stop sweating the small stuff.. make your decision , and go with it.

×

By using the site you agree to our Privacy, Cookies, and Terms of Service Policies.

OK