Some of the things Doctors do and say really tick me off!

**canoehead, BSN, RN** · Jul 31, 2005

You were both screaming at each other in the patient's room? That's not cool no matter who was right.

I have found that if you yell the other person will do so also. If you respond in a low tone they are more likely to listen.

allnurses Guide · Jul 31, 2005

Yeah, I have to agree with canoehead . . . even if you are right about the strip, you both behaved unprofessionally. And I kinda agree with the "whatever" comment - I have teenagers.

A low calm tone is the way to go - even if you are furious. Defusing the situation to be handled in private later is the way to go. Hard to do but the way to go.

steph

Peaches N L&D · Jul 31, 2005

I have to say in the heat of the moment with all the adrenaline rushing it is more than hard to not shout back if you feel like you are doing the best for your patients and are being attacked by a physician...Do I want everyone to think I am a door mat you can step on at any time, no I don't think so...This does not make me right, but it is JMHO :)

BETSRN · Jul 31, 2005

Noone replied when I posted this post in the Arrogance of some Dr's soo I decided to open up a new thread because I need feed back, I
need to know am I wrong to be angry and is it a bad idea to speak with this MD alone to tell him I am sorry he thought I was being disrespectful, but he should have pulled me aside to tell me what he thought I had done wrong......
Well talking about Arrogance, I am very disgruntled about what happened to me yesterday......It started out to be a busy day with 5 RN's scheduled and only 2 showing up, because the other 3 had their own crisis happening in their lives....the night crew decided to stay and help out . I had 2 laboring pt's one of whom was deaf/mute and in pain with no real way to express herself (I gave her stadol/phenergan sivp) which did not help her at all and explaining the epidural to her was quite an experience I would not like to visit in the near future, anyway while I was boulusing her for the epidural, my other pt was having deccels from 150's to 70's & 80's lasting 50-60sec, I turned off the pitocin gave her O2 and the whole bit, alerted the MD to come and assess the strip......The Dr. came and agreed it was a nonreassuring strip, but wanted to keep the pit off and then restart it once the baby recovered. A short while later I restarted the pitocin and the baby started to have varriable deccels occuring after the ctxs, so I called the Dr. to make him aware of the deccels occuring after the ctxs, as I was talking to him the FHT'S went down to the 60's he then called a stat c/s.
I had a lot of help from my co-workers and we were working quickly(in the mean time I'm thinking my poor deaf/mute pt is dying of pain and I hope this decceling baby is Ok!)So anyway the Dr comes in and starts screaming those are not late deccels they are varriables! I could not belive he was worrying about what kind of deccels they were when the FHT'S were down to the 70's and had not recovered, so I screamed back that is not the point! the baby is down and it needs to come out!, then he say's oh yes it is you need to take a fetal monitoring class and educate yourself!(me who is certified in fetal monitoring), so I said we don't need to talk about this right now!, he said you don't tell me when and where to talk! and I just shouted whatever!, he shouted young lady don't give me any attitude! and I decided I would just shut up so he could get the damn baby out.....Baby came out 9/9 apgar(Thank God!).
I was furious for several hrs and the Dr. had the nerves to come to me later that day to tell me if I want a Dr to respect me I have to show some respect not even his kids say whatever to him and that the next time he will right me up..............................The arrogance is killing me I am still furious :angryfire :angryfire

I responded to this on another thread.

Peaches N L&D · Jul 31, 2005

I responded to this on another thread.

Quote:

Originally Posted by BETSRN

You were advocating for the baby, which is our job. I think I would not have even answered the guy back the first time. I would write up the entire incident just as it happened (without emotion) and exactly what the doctor said to you, and just give a copy of it to your manager. It is best just to have that type of confrontation on record. You don't have to go anywhere with it. That way, if this guy tries to give you any grief about it later, you can just calmly say that your manager has a copy of what happened. Chances are, that will stop him right there.

By the way, if decels that look like lates go away with position changes, etc., they were never lates at all, but variables. I also hope you did not "shout" at him as you indicate. That behavior would make you as unprofessional as he was. Just keeping your cool is far better than appeaering to lose it. I kow you were uncomfprtable with the strip, but when one starts a shouting match, it just makes things worse.

Bottom line is that you shouod always conduct yourself in a professional manner so that the doc has nothing whatsoever to "write you up" about. I know hindsight is always 20/20 but the professionalism will get you through.

I had a doc pull that with me several years ago (I was advocating for the patient and I was right about what I did). He tried to dress me down but I stood my ground. I wrote him up (he had been written up several other times by other nurses). He tried to not allow me to take care of his patients (docs can't mandate that). He tried everything but it didn't work. I just acted totally professional with him. It got so that he would not even look at me. It was kind of funny. Anyway, he ended up leaving our facility which was good for all of us. He went back into the military. They can have him.

The point was, he knew he was done for at our place because no one (including his medical colleagues) would support him and all his arrogance. Just stick to your guns. You did the right thing in advocating for your patients. Just keep it on a very professional level.

Thank you BetsRN I appreciate all that you have said ITA....Thank you. I do plan to speak with him to let hm know I am sorry if he felt I was disrespecting him, but he was not exactly being professional himself.

MandyInMS · Jul 31, 2005

When MD's go on their "ego trips" ALWAYS stay calm in front of the pt..this is VERY difficult @ times, when you'd love to smack 'um one...lol...then, when out of earshot of the pt express yourself in a calm/cool manner....makes them look like the idiot throwing the temper tantrum (when in most cases is the truth)....always be professional and ya can't go wrong...I've learned how to "get people told" in a calm manner, get my point across, and never raise my voice ...takes practice but can be done.......and when an occasion arises that you feel you may 'snap' on someone..remove yourself...leave..walk out if possible..and collect yourself/gather your thoughts and emotions.........hope that helps (((hugzzzzzz)))

Peaches N L&D · Jul 31, 2005

When MD's go on their "ego trips" ALWAYS stay calm in front of the pt..this is VERY difficult @ times, when you'd love to smack 'um one...lol...then, when out of earshot of the pt express yourself in a calm/cool manner....makes them look like the idiot throwing the temper tantrum (when in most cases is the truth)....always be professional and ya can't go wrong...I've learned how to "get people told" in a calm manner, get my point across, and never raise my voice ...takes practice but can be done.......and when an occasion arises that you feel you may 'snap' on someone..remove yourself...leave..walk out if possible..and collect yourself/gather your thoughts and emotions.........hope that helps (((hugzzzzzz)))

It definetly would have been easier to keep calm and talk about it else where,thanks for the hugzzzzzzz, I needed it, now I have to swallow my pride and talk to this asshole tommorrow :banghead:

Luv2BAnurse · Jul 31, 2005

Peaches........

I soooooo needed to read this. Thanks. I like being able to read/share here b/c it helps me to keep a more positive perspective while at work. I can "drip honey" there, and come here to vent, or read others' vents. ONCE I was rude to a pt.s son, he really irritated me.....anyhow, had I known about this forum, I'd have had more "experience" albeit cyber, to draw from. Hope things work out well for you.

Marie_LPN, RN, LPN, RN · Aug 1, 2005

You were both screaming at each other in the patient's room? That's not cool no matter who was right.
I have found that if you yell the other person will do so also. If you respond in a low tone they are more likely to listen.

I agree. Screaming doesn't help anyone's anxiety.

z's playa · Aug 1, 2005

I dunno Marie...I usually feel much better after a 'temper tantrum a la Z'! :roll

Z

Peaches N L&D · Aug 2, 2005

I didn't even get a chance to tell him I didn't me to disrespect him, he was a total ass today as usual, soooooooo I just wrote my complaint on paper Now it's on file :yelclap: