So sad/so sweet at the same time

leslie :-D · Jan 30, 2012

indeed, this is one of the many privileges we get to experience in nursing.

if we truly took the time to consider the part we play in a man's/pt's most vulnerable times, i daresay we would only become more humbled and appreciative.

these type love stories are heart-wrenching and bittersweet.

thanks, pepper.

leslie

joanna73, BSN, RN · Jan 30, 2012

We had a couple like this in the home. He was 97, she is 94. Very nice couple. He died not too long ago....they were married 72 years. Amazing. You could see they still loved each other a lot.

sapphire18 · Jan 30, 2012

This reminds me of The Notebook- not to sound cliche. They're so lucky to have had each other all this time. :/

Long Term Care Columnist / Guide · Jan 30, 2012

At the nursing home where I worked a couple of years ago, we had a couple who'd been married for 77 years. She got pneumonia and passed away; I'll never forget his howls of grief and pain as he watched the funeral director roll her covered body out of their room. He never spoke again.

A week later to the day---almost to the very hour---his body followed hers to the grave. We always said he died of a broken heart. It happens. It must be awful for the poor family to lose both parents at once, but for the spouses themselves, it must be a blessing. I can't even imagine being without my husband of 31 years, so I can sympathize with these elderly folk who just can't live without the partner they have loved for six or seven decades or more. :crying2:

fiveofpeep · Jan 30, 2012

that is very romantic. I'm glad they got to share such a long, full life together.

LoveMyBugs, BSN, CNA, RN · Jan 30, 2012

Reminds me of a couple yeaaaarrrss ago while I was doing my CNA clinicals there was a couple who had been married 80 years, the husband turned 101 while I was doing my clinicals, they had only recently been admitted to the facility as they were living with their 79 year old son who was caring for them.

They were very sweet and would wheel themselves down to the dining room, hand in hand.

At my last adult nursing home, I had a little lady on diaylsis, her husband would arrive around the same time I did at 6am and would be there when I left around 8-9pm. He would spend all day sitting my her side as she slept, and would get her ready on her diaylsis days, as she became weaker he would feed her, I think they were married around 60 years or so.

imintrouble, BSN, RN · Jan 30, 2012

Being part of such devotion is a gift. Even if all I get to do is observe, I have been enriched by the experience.

MirandaKayRN · Jan 30, 2012

i had a patient admitted for comfort care, woman, dying, husband and family present at bedside, when i came on patient was moaning and thrashing in pain, I medicated and said a prayer, kept patient comfortable, this hospital didnt know what a hospitality cart was, ordered a hospitality cart from dietary and gave a couple guest meal tickets to family and a meal for husband and I set him up at bedside. I was leaving my shift and peaked in to check on the family before I left. and I saw the patient's husband say goodbye and saw the woman take her very last breath Ive never seen a patient die before. Husband said to grandaughters "She's in heaven now." the gentle man witnessed both his mom and dad and now his wife pass. Turns out all the little extras I did in that shift made all the difference in the world. About a week later the family returned to the hospital to show thanks and bought me a gift a stone that said nurses are angels in training and a small pin with my name on it that said I had a guardian angel watching over me. Never had a gift from patient before, turns out in just 10 hours the impact I had on this family through this difficult time will carry with them always and it made me realize the influence our attitudes and attentiveness can really make on someone who began as a stranger at the begining of my shift I will always have a spiritual connection with that family.

exnavygirl-RN · Jan 30, 2012

So sweet.

tas026 · Jan 31, 2012

At the nursing home where I worked a couple of years ago, we had a couple who'd been married for 77 years. She got pneumonia and passed away; I'll never forget his howls of grief and pain as he watched the funeral director roll her covered body out of their room. He never spoke again.
A week later to the day---almost to the very hour---his body followed hers to the grave. We always said he died of a broken heart. It happens. It must be awful for the poor family to lose both parents at once, but for the spouses themselves, it must be a blessing. I can't even imagine being without my husband of 31 years, so I can sympathize with these elderly folk who just can't live without the partner they have loved for six or seven decades or more.

This is the much better alternative to what happened to my great grandmother! My great grandfather died about 12 years ago. My great gma would constantly say that she can't wait to die because she has no one to live for anymore. I think that my grandfather cursed her by saying that she would live to be 100 years old. She tried to stay busy, but she slowly deteriorated. Literally, one week after her 100th birthday, her health took a serious decline. It took a few months, but this past year she passed away. People asked me why I wasn't upset, and I all I could tell my other family members was that half of my great grandmother died 12 years ago, and the little bit that was left had died a few years before. I have found the person that I want to spend the rest of my life with, and I can totally sympathize with what she went through. I couldn't imagine something happening to him now since we are young, and me having to spend my entire life alone.

midwestnotnurse · Dec 15, 2012

I watched my father-in-law died recently. He was one of my best friends and like a father to me, he's one of the only good role models I ever had. The little things the care staff did at the end are what I remember, like young CNA who established a rapport with him and shook his hand when his shift ended and tried to make us as comfortable as possible. I remember the young serious doctor who probably knew with certainty he was dying but did a good job keeping his composure and not bluntly trying to burst our bubble about taking him home. That extra effort put in my care staff on the way out is noticed and remembered forever by the family.