So Frustrated I Could Cry..

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Well actually I did cry :-( My Dad's 75th birthday party is coming up in a month, he's been planning this party for the past year. The party falls on my weekend to work (the party is in another state), I submitted my request for time off as soon as my parents had the date set, which was a little over a month ago. About the same time I submitted my request one of the other two NOC nurses put in her resignation. After a couple weeks of not hearing anything back from my scheduler I sent her message letting her know how important it was for me to be off that weekend because it was for my Dad's b-day and since we lost my older brother 6 months ago I couldn't miss a family function now. Didn't hear anything back from her. Than the other NOC nurse put in her notice, leaving me the only full time nurse on that shift :-/. I could to work last night and had a denial note waiting for me. It basically said "due to the current staffing issues I cannot approve your request for time off" I am so angry. There are only two on call nurses I can ask to work for me and one of them has already told me she is busy. The other nurse is my last hope. I don't even know what else to do and I cannot imagine having to tell my parents that I won't be coming.. :-(

Specializes in Emergency Room, Trauma ICU.
this is sort of off topic but...one of my co-workers is having cosmetic surgery. Her FMLA was denied since it wasn't a necessary surgery, (and she is ok with that) but hospital policy is that LOAs are at the discretion of the manager. So 6 months ago she asked our manager when it would be ok to take off for the surgery. Manager told her September. So she scheduled and paid for said surgery and now management is telling her no. Is that ok too? My dad has a saying "Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part". Perhaps more management (in general) needs to adopt this mantra. OK'ing something 6 months in advance and then going back on that is NOT ok.

Approving and then revoking leave is not okay. In the case of OP her leave was never approved.

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So 6 months ago she asked our manager when it would be ok to take off for the surgery. Manager told her September. So she scheduled and paid for said surgery and now management is telling her no. Is that ok too?

According to the Family and Medical Leave Act (if she is eligible), she can take medical leave, and it doesn't matter what the surgery is for--elective, necessary, or urgent--she is protected from revealing health conditions or the reason for the surgery. The Federal FMLA forms (which is what most organizations use), have a place for the amount of leave requested, beginning and ending date, and a signature from the surgeon/physician. Her employer is prohibited from asking what the surgery is specifically for, but if she already told the manager why she wanted the time off, she might be in a spot of bother.

This is another of the many reasons I keep my health information out of the hands of employers. It's none of their business, and it should never be up to an employer what medical care is necessary or urgent.

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Specializes in NICU, PICU, Transport, L&D, Hospice.
I believe I stated my opinion, and suggested she at least give timely notice, rather than springing it upon everyone. That isn't a guilt trip. I went in to nursing to care for patients, and I took an oath to care for my patients.

Even if my employer lacks integrity and refuses to show me respect and honor, it doesn't mean I should show them up by calling off with no timely notice. My personal values dictate that I give appropriate notice that I quit, or that I appeal the refusal of my vacation request to the appropriate HR representative or my union. The last thing I would do, if it were entirely avoidable, is play a part in the delay of care to my patients.

There are other solutions than going nuclear.

Regardless, the patients are the responsibility of the facility 24/7, not the nurse. What happens to them when we are not there is not our responsibility. When a nurse has determined that he/she needs to be somewhere other than work there is no need to feel responsibility for the well being of the patients, that is the concern of the agency or facility to provide for their care.

In this case there is very good reason for this nurse to gather with her extended family in to mourn and celebrate on a specific date. The request was made in a reasonable time frame. This is a personal decision that speaks to the nurse's personal relationships and emotional health.

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Specializes in NICU, PICU, Transport, L&D, Hospice.
No one said she couldn't see him, just not that specific weekend.

This specific weekend celebrates, with extended family and other guests presumably, the 75th birthday of her father and the mourns the death of her brother. Gathering is important although some participants don't seem to get that.

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Specializes in Emergency Room, Trauma ICU.
This specific weekend celebrates, with extended family and other guests presumably, the 75th birthday of her father and the mourns the death of her brother. Gathering is important although some participants don't seem to get that.

Yes and all of that can be done on a different weekend. It sucks to miss family parties, but it's a party. It's not an emergency, no one is in the hospital or dying. In my opinion it's juvenile to call off to go to a party.

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Specializes in NICU, PICU, PACU.

What a tough situation. That being said, check the institutions rules on call outs. If we call off on a day we requested we are called to HR. They can fire us. Usually it is a write up, but they can terminate us. And if you call out do not post anything on social media or allow people to tag you. If we call out and you show up at a party, etc, immediate termination.

Bribe that other girl for the weekend...work extra weekends, offer up a holiday, if you really want it, sweeten the deal!

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Specializes in MICU, SICU, CICU.

to NurseQT,

listen. When you are 75 and in the nursing home, that manager isn't going to come visit on Sunday and it wont matter a hill of beans that you called out sick at this crappy job in 2014. What will matter is your family. Go see your doctor, get a note to cover the whole darn weekend.

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Specializes in Clinical Documentation Specialist, LTC.
to NurseQT,

listen. When you are 75 and in the nursing home, that manager isn't going to come visit on Sunday and it wont matter a hill of beans that you called out sick at this crappy job in 2014. What will matter is your family. Go see your doctor, get a note to cover the whole darn weekend.

This! This is exactly what I would do. It's not just some party. It's a very special occasion that honestly, if it were me, I would take my chances.

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Specializes in Maternity.

Seriously has anyone heard from the OP?

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Specializes in Clinical Documentation Specialist, LTC.
Seriously has anyone heard from the OP?

I was wondering this myself. I pray she is able to work something out for that weekend. My heart goes out to her.

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Specializes in Maternity.
I was wondering this myself. I pray she is able to work something out for that weekend. My heart goes out to her.

Me too. I'm not sure all of this discussion has been as helpful as we all intended. I hope it has. At this point I think we should wait and see if she responds. I think we are beating a dead horse at this point with the opinions divided down the middle.

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people call in sick all the time........

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