Should I wait to have a baby?

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I was just accepted to nursing school and will start the two year program in September. I am 35 years old and won't be done with the program until I am 37. My boyfriend and I really want to have a child ASAP because neither of us have kids and after 6 years together it is something both of us are ready for. Is it possible to complete school while pregnant? My age concerns me because I don't want to be 40 and having children. I also have worked very hard to get to where I am academically and don't want to give up on that either. Is it unreasonable to even consider having a baby and finishing school at the same time?

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Specializes in ER.

First comes love, then comes MARRIAGE, and then comes a baby in a baby carriage.

Call me old fashioned...:nurse:

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Specializes in ICU / PCU / Telemetry / Oncology.
First comes love, then comes MARRIAGE, and then comes a baby in a baby carriage.

Call me old fashioned...:nurse:

First comes baby, then if you´re lucky one or both of the other two ... maybe.

Call me 21st century realist ... 😜

Sent from my iPad using allnurses

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Specializes in Med-surg, home care.

I say wait. From what I read nursing school is difficult enough and a baby will make it harder. You have to consider childcare (not just securing it or cost but also seeing if provider schedule works with school schedule) and you have to consider how you would balance caring for an infant with school requirements. People do it I am sure but it can't be easy. I have 3 children but no babies (youngest will be 5) and I know it will be difficult if I go to nursing school. Good luck

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I am in my second semester of nursing school, and there is a girl in my class whose 36 and pregnant with her 2nd child. Her first one is 14. She's due in september, just beginning our 3rd semester and shes going to try and do it. It wouldn't be my first choice to do it, but it can be done! Try to get pregnant when you can plan to have a baby around breaks ;) haha good luck to ya!

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Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.

I would get through nursing school first. You don't know how the pregnancy will be. Nursing school is tough on its own, I wouldn't add a pregnancy on top of it. I know you want to have a baby, but sometimes you just have to wait. Or if having a family is that important to you put off nursing school & have a baby.

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I see this through the eyes of a woman who struggled with infertility, so. ;)

Some women's fertility is intact and A-ok at the age of 37. Other women, however, aren't so blessed (or cursed, depending on how you look at it!) and have maxed out fertility-wise by 30. It's really independent.

My advice to you is to go to your OBGYN and ask for some very simple fertility bloodwork that will tell you your current fertility status. These tests are FSH, LH, Estradiol, and AMH. Have them drawn on cycle day 3. You will be looking for FSH that is preferably under 8, LH that is similar to the FSH level, estradiol below 40, and AMH of around 2.5.

If everything is copacetic, then I'd go ahead with school.

If everything is not okay, then time is of the essence and if having children is important to you (it sure would be for me), then how you proceed is up to you and your doctor.

A lot of women have a false sense of security when it comes to their fertility, when in reality most women have impaired fertility (in some capacity) by 37. Female fertility declines after the age of 27, taking a big dive after 35.

Just my $.02.

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Specializes in Hospice, Palliative Care.

Good day:

Also, check into the school(s) you are looking at going to in order to find out how they handle any leaves of absence from the program. Even if they answer leaves are ok, dig deep into what's required to come back into the program. At our school, if you miss a semester, and are allowed back in, you have to redo the clinical skill tests to show you are still competent with the skills.

It's already been stated nursing school is extremely difficult (it's night and day compared to prerequisites); and taking care of young children is very demanding time and energy wise. Mixing the two is possible, but not guaranteed.

Thank you.

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That's tough. I know people your age that are in a rush to have children, and I totally understand that. I've heard of people being *very* pregnant during nursing school, having the baby during the semester, and not missing too much. I think it ultimately boils down to how good of a time manager you are. You know yourself best. If more than one thing at a time gives you fits, maybe you should wait. I know myself and I know I couldn't do it. Some people do and are just fine. It really is case by case.

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Specializes in NICU, Trauma, Oncology.

I had my baby at 34. He is a big reason I decided to go to nursing school. He was 1.5 when I started. Is it hard? Yes. Is it doable? Absolutely. You need a solid support system ready to help you out in a pinch.

ETA: fwiw regarding some of the other posts. I got pregnant while we were in pre-Cana classes and got married in the Catholic Church 4.5 months pregnant. As long as you have love and support you will be fine.

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Specializes in NICU, Trauma, Oncology.

Also we were gonna think about maybe trying for #2 after graduation. When I will be 37

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Specializes in NICU, PICU, PACU.

At 35 you are considered high risk for more problems such as hypertension, gestational diabetes and just preemie labor from stress, etc. I'd check the school's policies about missing classes and clinicals. It's a tough decision.

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