Should I move out or live with mom during school????

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I am a 27 year old CNA. I am engaged and have two children. I am currently a PCT and am planning on getting my BSN. My mother gave me the offer of a lifetime. She wants me to focus on school and stay with her for the 4 years and not have to work. But I am craving my independence and would like to get my own place and give something more to my children. My daughter is 9 and getting older and I want to move her to a better neighborhood and give her her own room and space. My fiance is not making enough to support all of us without me working. I just don't know if I want to stay with mom and not work for 4 years, but I know school and working is tough?? What would you do???:confused:

Move in.

If it doesn't work out, then you can move elsewhere and will have saved some money on living expenses.

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Stay with your mother..she's offering you an oppertunity of a lifetime and not only will you not have to worry about various financial aspects that creep up, like rent, groceries, etc., but you're also getting emotional support and the peace of mind that comes when leaving your children in the hands of someone you trust.

Best Wishes,

KaseyP

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Specializes in M/S, MICU, CVICU, SICU, ER, Trauma, NICU.

Staying with your mother is the responsible thing to do. Nursing school is very difficult, and you already have a lot of other stressors.

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I would take your mom's offer!!!

It would be great NOT to work during school and your children will get the attention they need from your mom that may be lacking while you are studying and stressing about school. This isn't a dig just a reality.

Take it!!!!

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Specializes in Ortho and Tele med/surg.

Think about your decision long and hard. I was in the same situation. At first, it seems like a good idea then, it was truly a nightmare. I mean I didn't have to pay rent and bills like you, but my mom and I didn't get a long sometimes and there were times when I came really close failing an exam. Ask yourself this: "Do you get a long with your mom?" Don't let the initial excitement cloud your judgement. Like I said, think long and hard about this because when things get stressful is your mother going to be supportive? People change all the time. I wished someone had told me this when I first started nursing school. Good luck!

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ivanabeearn

how sweet of you to send your mom on a cruise!

you must be a terrific daughter/mother and that's why your relatives are so willing to help you.

god bless you!

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I am married with 1 child and my mother is moving from across the country to help my husband with my son, while I study. I think you should move in with your mother.

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Specializes in ER.

My motto is that when you don't know what to do, don't do anything. Continue to consider all options but if in your heart you don't have a strong inclination to choose A over B, wait a bit.

I agree with Miranda as well. Have a good discussion with Mom concerning expections and so forth. It certainly wouldn't hurt to stay, keep working part-time, and see how it goes. Sometimes, just having options makes any situation easier. If you keep working part-time while you can you'll always have the option to move out if you feel you need to.

What would be less stressful, in the long run? Living with Mom can be a sweet deal and a wonderful experience for everyone concerned. Living with Mom and having conflict over parenting, chores, love life, or even the proper way to put the toilet paper on the holder is not so sweet.

Then there's always choice C. You said

My daughter is 9 and getting older and I want to move her to a better neighborhood and give her her own room and space.
What is wrong with the neighborhood you're in now? (Just rhetorical.) If you don't live in a safe neighborhood, you may need to give your mom a counter-offer. You may need to say- 'You know mom, we really enjoy living with you, but there was xyz crime over the past few months and I just don't feel safe here. What if we put the house up for rent and we all moved to a safer area?'
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In my opinion, if you have a good relationship with your mother, I would stay with your mum. After your 4 year nursing program and you are established, your children will understand (they should be grateful). Now the fiance, what does he feel about this? Is he going to be understanding of what you are trying to do with your life, the children's and his for peet's sake? Your mother sounds like a nice person and will do whatever she can do for you and the children to help U better yourself. Stay with MUM!!

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Specializes in med/surg/tele/LTC/geriatrics.

That is an amazing offer from your mother. Given the oppertunity not to work you will have more time for school and to be a mom to your children. Just remember it is only for a season. Best Wishes.

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Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.
ivanabeearn

how sweet of you to send your mom on a cruise!

you must be a terrific daughter/mother and that's why your relatives are so willing to help you.

god bless you!

i know! that is so sweet. i'm going to print out her post and "accidentally" leave it next to my daughter's pillow. . .;)

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I know! That is so sweet. I'm going to print out her post and "accidentally" leave it next to my daughter's pillow. . .;)

These are desperate times for grandmas and we have to resort to things like that. :rolleyes:

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