senior staff bullying?--in tears

RN1982 · Jan 16, 2009

I think you are being too sensitive. I doubt you can change her attitude. I don't know why you cried over washing a bottle. If Sue said she was going to do it then you should have let her. Nursing is a 24hour/day job, somethings aren't going to be finished on your shift.

beckabeckahi · Jan 16, 2009

There are bigger issues than an unwashed bottle. She's being a jerk, let it go, and believe in yourself a little more. I once had a nurse come and find me to tell me my patient was on the floor in a condescending tone right after I had received report. Like it was my fault. People can be mean, it's not worth one second of your precious time away from work worrying about it.

trelly · Jan 16, 2009

I will admit to being a little sensitive like the thread starter. I would have probably been upset too, not because of a bottle, because of how I was spoken to in this situation.

As a new nurse myself, we have some senior staff on the floor who are plain rude. Anytime you ask them questions they look at you like you are stupid. It does affect your confidence.

Once you are at the end of your shift, a little tired and stressed from a hard days work, things affect you differently than they would if you were at the top of your game.

Saifudin · Jan 16, 2009

She has issues besides maybe she is tainted with prejudice. I work in Saudi, therefore, I am a foreigner. Most of my staff are expats from arab and asian countries. I understand if you feel a bit sensitive. One sometimes needs to 'walk (or work) in another's shoes' to understand what may not apparent to them.

You sound confident and good at what you do. Hold to that and if it occurs again, try to take her aside or tell her you'd like to speak with her when she has some free time. If that is too much for you, go to your supervisor, but, I agree, "don't cry over spilled milk" so-to-speak. Save your tears for the big stuff.

Princess_M83 · Jan 16, 2009

I would have to say to either speak to her, or if you can't you are going to have to get over it. Sometimes people are unhappy in other areas of their lives and take it out on the person or people who presents the least likely to fight back. Forget it. You most likely will not be able to change her attitude but remember Nursing is 24/7 and things get left undone. It was a bottle, nothing big, if that is honestly all she has to complain about being left undone then she is looking for something to complain about and will find something no matter what you do. Forget about her, try not to be so sensitive ( I know it is hard to do) and remember that you take care of your patients and do your best.

Keepstanding, ASN, RN · Jan 16, 2009

sorry you got treated rudely. why are you washing bottles anyway. don't you use the pre-filled disposable ones ?

praiser :heartbeat

RNmom08 · Jan 16, 2009

sorry you got treated rudely. why are you washing bottles anyway. don't you use the pre-filled disposable ones ?
praiser :heartbeat

i was wondering this as well. we have formula companies give the hospital their formula (in an effort to get mom's to stick with it after they leave the hospital.) they are great and besides, the bottles (i have been told) are a perfect place for bacteria to grow - especially if some parents aren't the cleanest or even the way some nurses clean the bottles. unless you disinfect them every time...

Vito Andolini · Jan 16, 2009

I think you are being too sensitive. I doubt you can change her attitude. I don't know why you cried over washing a bottle. If Sue said she was going to do it then you should have let her. Nursing is a 24hour/day job, somethings aren't going to be finished on your shift.

She cried because of Jenny's rudeness and coldness. And to have gone along with Sue, against Jenny, well, can you say "WW3?"

RN1982 · Jan 16, 2009

Jenny's attitude/behavior is not going to change and it's nothing to cry over. Jenny is one of those people who will find something to complain about because no one has called her out on it. The OP needs to be strong enough to look Jenny in the eye and say "Mind your own business." If Sue was fine with cleaning the bottle, she could have left the bottle, it's not a big deal. We've all dealt with problem co-workers before. I've had co-workers just like Jenny, they nitpick and complain about you because they think they can and because they think you give in but once you snap back they shut up. My co-worker did when she was the same way to me, just like Jenny is toward the OP.

marie-francoise · Jan 16, 2009

Can't stand those tsk-tsking biddy types. One can get tsk-tsked to tears. Those things add up. I don't blame you for tears.

nurse15dc · Jan 16, 2009

Maybe I've worked too many tough nursing units and seen more bulling, but in my humble opinion staying 30 min over and being reminded to finish something by the on coming RN is par for the course. You'd be better served if you could let stuff like that roll off your back like water off a duck. Crying only gives bullies more power.

To me the best response would have been to look directly at Sue, smile and graciously thank her for washing the bottle that you 'simply forgot'. I might have even thrown in a little laugh to emphasize Jenny's pettiness.

Like TraumaNurse07 said, you can't change nurses like Jenny but you CAN change your reaction to her. No telling what her 'deal' is. Depending on what country you're working in sometimes native RN's resent the importation of nurses. This is because in the past hospitals have used easy access to a large pool of overseas nurses as a bargaining chip to maintain the status quo (poor staffing ratios, lack of substantial raises for senior RN's, etc.) I don't know if that the situation here and obviously that's not the "pc" thing to bring up, but it's better to be armed with the truth.