Seeking real assistance here

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I'll try to make this short as possible: I graduated from LPN school back in 2012. I worked night shift a year and a half. I can't work night shift; it's bad for my health. I have Bipolar disorder type II (fall into depressions) for which I'm stable on my meds. I was going through an emotional difficulty right after that job until I got another job about 3 months later at a top research university. Unfortunately for 3 months, I had to put up with a preceptor who hated me, tried to turn everyone against me, and made me look like I wasn't doing my job.Trust me I was really good at my job.I was originally going to give 2 weeks' notice, but after I saw my supervisor blindly side with her without investigating facts, I arrived at an unhealthy level of emotional distress and had to leave the job right there and then.I could have reported her earlier but I had asked my father for advice and he said not to say anything.I now listen to myself more.After that, I went through more problems (relationships and deaths in the family) and couldn't look for work until almost a year later. I started to work at an outpatient surgery center.I was great at this job, too, with the exception of one problem: they were having me work 14 hours a day without 30 minutes of lunch to sit and eat. My body broke down from exhaustion and I left this one too without two weeks notice after 3 weeks. There was no physical way I could continue.I want to do nursing PT, but I have very large gaps that are difficult to explain and hide. 1)The general assumption is that I should never mention to a future employer that I left a job without two weeks notice.But what if the job I am applying to deals with the same I had dealt and done well with? 2)f I lie and deny having worked since then, can't they just refer to a background check and see that I *have* worked? Someone please help. None of this has been my fault. Life circumstances.

Hi, sorry about your unfortunate job experiences. My best advise to you as a fellow colleague is to take the time to really think about what type of work situation is best for you. Try to figure out what your stressors are and what you excel at. Do not put yourself back into the same position that was unhealthy for you in the first place. Try to figure out what went wrong, without blaming yourself or anyone else. Then you can figure out what to do to be successful in your next job. Set yourself up for success. Because at this point, you need to succeed and overcome a rough start. Then when you search for jobs, look for jobs that put you in a winning situation. There are many different types of jobs, prn can even be an option then there is no commitment on your end. When you interview for the new jobs I would just be honest about what happened. Don't blame anyone, just state factually why the job was not a good fit for you. Then tell the prospective employer what you learned about the job and yourself and why you feel that you would succeed this time. I think people really respect honesty in an interview. Signing up for PRN jobs at this point might be a good way to try out new jobs without the commitment as you could just turn down shifts if they were not for you. Don't look at yourself as a failure, just enjoy the adventure of being able to try out new jobs. Best of luck, let me know how it goes.

You need to to self reflect. You are not taking any personal responsibility. Your attitude is negative. Change your thought process and you will find a job. You can change only you. Stop looking at negatives, it is a waste of time. Never will you find a perfect job, nursing is tough and YOU NEED TO BE TOUGH AND THICK SKINNED or you won't make it as a nurse.

Stop making excuses, you made choices. You can not change the past but you can change you. Get Tough and stop whining!

Face up and start applying. You may have to work a &$@# job but keep it, work hard and read the book, "Your Erroneous Zones" excellent and you will see how your thinking is flawed.

Specializes in Clinical Research, Outpt Women's Health.

You made a mess no matter what the reason. It will be hard to find another job, but not impossible. I hope you do well.

Specializes in Medical-ICU.

I think everyone has pretty much covered everything. Personal reasons can sometimes be red flags during the hiring process so I would avoid going into a lot of detail about it when you get an interview. In order for employers to care about personal issues, a rapport must be built. Once that happens, unit managers and supervisors are wiling to work with you but that's further down the road. I think you need to make a list of the things you cannot do without when it comes to taking a new job. Things you cannot absolutely compromise on. However because of you leaving without two weeks notice you may have slim pickings at first. Try to see this as an opportunity to build your resume again. Stick it out for a few years at one place. This way when and if you move on, you have a good rapport with organization and you look like a committed employee. I would not talk about grievances you have with past employers period. It often looks very bad and you end up looking like a trouble maker and not a team player even if that isn't the case. It takes a lot of money to train nurses so they want someone they believe they can retain and is worth the investment. Qualities include getting along well with others, committed to the organization, good attitude and flexibility. I hope that you take what all of these previous posters as solid advice even if you don't agree with the delivery because I think they all have some great advice on what to do next and accountability. Hope everything ends up working out and keep us posted!

Specializes in Psychiatric Nursing.

Maybe get some vocational coaching to reframe these jobs on your resume and interviews. Can you get references at any of these jobs? Like people said employers want competence and dependability. Your resume and your interview have to project this. And try to find a job that fits you. Best wishes.

Specializes in PICU, Pediatrics, Trauma.
So basically, being a good worker but having falling victim to life's circumstances makes me "non rehirable" for positions I would be 100X better at than most people that apply to them.

I was expecting a more positive reply from a nursing forum. SMH. Everything I have seen. All the laziness, all the underqualification that is hired, yet I am "non rehirable" because I fall into the wrong hands.

Under the circumstances, I would simply say you had some health issues that are now under control.Never lie, and try to avoid bad talking a previous employer. See if it is possible to get leters of reference. They are very helpful.

Specializes in Pediatrics, Emergency, Trauma.
I think everyone has pretty much covered everything. Personal reasons can sometimes be red flags during the hiring process so I would avoid going into a lot of detail about it when you get an interview. In order for employers to care about personal issues, a rapport must be built. Once that happens, unit managers and supervisors are wiling to work with you but that's further down the road. I think you need to make a list of the things you cannot do without when it comes to taking a new job. Things you cannot absolutely compromise on. However because of you leaving without two weeks notice you may have slim pickings at first. Try to see this as an opportunity to build your resume again. Stick it out for a few years at one place. This way when and if you move on, you have a good rapport with organization and you look like a committed employee. I would not talk about grievances you have with past employers period. It often looks very bad and you end up looking like a trouble maker and not a team player even if that isn't the case. It takes a lot of money to train nurses so they want someone they believe they can retain and is worth the investment. Qualities include getting along well with others, committed to the organization, good attitude and flexibility. I hope that you take what all of these previous posters as solid advice even if you don't agree with the delivery because I think they all have some great advice on what to do next and accountability. Hope everything ends up working out and keep us posted!

Well said.

I also agree talking to a therapist is a great option to help you sift through thoughts and help you figure out how to respond to situations; it helped me tremendously during my exacerbation with PTSD, which had me varying with tons of anxiety and some bouts of depression.

I actually was let go during orientation at the peak of my symptoms-in critical care; I was discouraged, but I took several positions where I worked my way BACK to Critical Care-in a Level 1 Trauma ED, I still had to reflect my part, lessons learned, and work through making sure I took care of my health first in order to position myself for success.

Best Wishes.

Specializes in HH, Peds, Rehab, Clinical.

I sense a real "victim mentality" with your post. You were a GREAT worker, yet others were saying you weren't. You left not one, but two jobs with no real notice because they made you work long hours (hello, nursing).

I wish you luck in your career. I forsee some hurdles ahead of you, unfortunately. SOME of these things ARE your fault, you need to own that.

Specializes in PICU, Pediatrics, Trauma.
So basically, being a good worker but having falling victim to life's circumstances makes me "non rehirable" for positions I would be 100X better at than most people that apply to them.

I was expecting a more positive reply from a nursing forum. SMH. Everything I have seen. All the laziness, all the underqualification that is hired, yet I am "non rehirable" because I fall into the wrong hands.

Sorry you haven't received more positive replies... I will attempt to support you, but you do need to know that the way you left previous employers causes problems.

In light of your illness, you explained that you left employers without notice on 2 occasions. Do you understand that no matter how great a nurse or worker of any kind you could be, leaving without notice makes you appear unreliable? I'm sure you can understand that. This is the point others were making.

I can make a suggestion. What about consulting with a resume writer to help you construct a cover letter that may explain your situation so as to try to have prospective employers give you another chance? There are so many "do's and don'ts" these days in resume writing, so it would be best to find an expert in this to assist you. They have excellent skills in coaching people on how to word things that can make a huge difference in how your resume is received. That is only the first step to possibly help you get in the door.

The next step is very important in that you have to be able to convince the next prospective employer that you will be reliable from now on. You must understand that employers, especially in health care need reliable workers. Even an mediocre employee is better than none when someone simply doesn't show up.

I feel for you. I know that negotiating through life with your health issue is difficult, but you cannot hold others accountable for the fact that you have had short-comings in the past. It is not other peoples' fault that you were unreliable. So now you have to become reliable and change your circumstances in order to be successful from here on out! Good Luck to you!

Specializes in PICU, Pediatrics, Trauma.
Hi, sorry about your unfortunate job experiences. My best advise to you as a fellow colleague is to take the time to really think about what type of work situation is best for you. Try to figure out what your stressors are and what you excel at. Do not put yourself back into the same position that was unhealthy for you in the first place. Try to figure out what went wrong, without blaming yourself or anyone else. Then you can figure out what to do to be successful in your next job. Set yourself up for success. Because at this point, you need to succeed and overcome a rough start. Then when you search for jobs, look for jobs that put you in a winning situation. There are many different types of jobs, prn can even be an option then there is no commitment on your end. When you interview for the new jobs I would just be honest about what happened. Don't blame anyone, just state factually why the job was not a good fit for you. Then tell the prospective employer what you learned about the job and yourself and why you feel that you would succeed this time. I think people really respect honesty in an interview. Signing up for PRN jobs at this point might be a good way to try out new jobs without the commitment as you could just turn down shifts if they were not for you. Don't look at yourself as a failure, just enjoy the adventure of being able to try out new jobs. Best of luck, let me know how it goes.

Well spoken, good advice and kind! I hope she finds this helpful!

Specializes in PICU, Pediatrics, Trauma.
Quite frankly, I don't know how any of you, except for Rainmom are nurses and can probably see how you've maintained stability at your jobs precisely because of the cut-throat aspect of your nature. I replied "victim to life's circumstances" because the advice of the post didn't include any hope for the future as Rainmom addressed and I quote "That's not to say you will never find another job. You just probably won't be able to be too picky & may have to take a less desirable position for a while until you can move into an area you really want. Best wishes."

That is called providing a stern outlook, but giving HOPE. JustBeachyNurse, you judged me and automatically assumed I was at fault. You assumed I "misinterpreted" a situation (to which I did have a witness but they were in a position which could not be compromised by meddling into our conflicts) and you compared me to another person who was struggling, AS I DID MYSELF. One of the very PILLARS of nursing is to do no harm and to essentially put yourself in your patients' shoes. I did so when I made a decision to not compromise my own health and my PATIENTS' health which could have been affected by the amount of distress I was going through in addition to the one they could feel from my preceptor, and that is more than I can say for you and others.

This is a conflict on an online forum. It could happen. Most of you will probably be upset or angry or worse, deny your own humanity, but I really do hope you take some reflection because this is not the way to treat a fellow nurse who was seeking help.

I hope you keep reading the responses to your post. There are some very kind and helpful responses, but you must understand the reality of the workplace.

1) You must be reliable.

2) Get the support you need to cope with the stress of life/work.

3) Consider if this type of work is too stressful for you, or if you could be more successful in a different environment. This is actually taking good care of yourself.

4) Learn, grow, and move on.

Maybe you could hire on with an agency. You could work at several places and see if you like it well enough to be hired permanently by one of them.

Where are you, OP? What's going on in your life today? Are you OK? Please let us hear from you.

You are not necessarily ineligible for rehire. Don't use these places as references, but you are not necessarily ineligible.

You can cover gaps in employment because maybe you were home taking care of ill and infirm family members.

Once you do start working again, just take your breaks. Let your person in charge know that you simply must take your unpaid break. You need to use the restroom, put your feet up because your new shoes hurt, or you feel faint. Don't be demanding or apologetic, just say the truth - you need your meal break.

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