other rn mama's ..going back to work after

[erin01]

So I worked f/t nights on tele floor before i had my lo. I knew it would be hard to return and was not sure if i would. WEll my maternity leave is almost over and i have asked for per diem work. I told my hubby yesterday that they had said ok. Well he freaked out! WE had discussed me going back one night a week. And he had mixed emotions about being left with the baby alone! WEll now they time is 2 weeks away and he lost his mind about it yesterday. I am sick just thinking about leaving my lo and then to add to it to have him tell me he cant do and if i think he can i am out of my mind. I just kept saying its just one night, and if its to much i will quit. Well i am just sick thinking about it. Every time lo woke up last night i wanted to cry thinking it would be hubby with him. I also have a 3yr and was thinking he would have to spend the first night or two i work at the grandparents to make it a little easier on my husband. I am soooo torn on what to do. I would like at some point to go back to work but am not sure if its just to soon. My lo will be 10 weeks old when i go back. I did not want to give up my job because i was scared i would lose my skills and have to start from scratch all over again. The other part just feels so unnatural to leave my sons as i am there mom and it hurts to do. I figured if i worked the night before my inlaws could help watch the babies while i grabs some sleep and then i would get up and just go to bed really early. Anyone out there with experience with this? or just a hug lol=(

[newtress, LPN]

The term LO. What does it mean? I honestly haven't heard of that yet, enlighten me!

[JBudd, MSN]

little one

[Somerset3010]

Same boat.... However I've been off for just over a year.

I return in 2 weeks😁.... Dropped from full time to very part time and into a new department. It was alllll peachy until 2 weeks before the start. The nerves kick in. BREATHE....we tell most of the people we care for this same thing, right? It works for 5 minutes for me hahaha. Then just take it 5 minutes at a time :)

I also work cardiac and ER.... Not an easy area to just "step back into" .... Good for you for keeping the skills!

I am told one day at a time.... It's not easy... We are tough though. Tough as nails.

my hubby was so nervous. So we have been letting him do the baby stuff on all the weekends and some overnights while I leave or sit back.... He's getting more comfortable... It will just take time. You got this!

[heron, ASN, RN]

Having gone through it, my advice is to nail down your childcare as best you can before you actually have to be legally responsible for patients' welfare.

If if your husband is your only option, then he needs either a stat revision of attitude or you need to make back-up plans, preferably more than one. Childcare emergencies are unpredictable and, since the kid's welfare and safety always have to come first, can easily cost you your job - and your income - with little or no notice.

And, no, major holidays and Johnnie's first birthday party are not childcare emergencies. Them you can plan for.

[cleback]

I just recently went through this. Honestly, it's his kid too and he should be able to take of LO for the night. I returned 7 weeks after delivery. My going back to work and having him with the babe alone on the weekend was actually a relationship saver for us. He was starting to ask me the dreaded "what did you do with your day" on maternity leave and couldn't understand why I may need a break from watching the chld in the evenings. Although he will still text me the occasional "omg baby's crying, what do I do?" message, he does fine with LO and now actually appreciates how time consuming taking care LO can be. If he is really that distraught, make sure he has support or a back up plan when you're away, but seriously,... they'll be fine.

[evastone, BSN, RN]

Going back to work was very hard for me. I loved my job and we needed the money but I wanted more times with the baby. Plus, I was terrified about leaving the baby with my husband (who told me that he had never held a baby in his life) to watch all night.

Surprisingly, DH stepped up to the plate. The day I had to return to work, I sat on the couch sobbing, "I CAN'T do this!" My husband comforted me, and sat with me the whole time insisting, yes, I can do this, and everything will be fine. And it was. It still is. Best of all, it allowed him to really bond with the little guy.

Returning to work after maternity leave is hard on everyone. But one day a week should be very doable and it will bring out the best in your husband. After doing it a few times, he'll feel like a pro.

[traumaRUs, MSN, APRN]

Since you have a 3 y/o, hubby should be used to children?

Personally, I think (and yes I know this isn't politically correct) but he needs to man-up and just do it. No complaining, no whining. Hes the DAD for goodness sake.

My husband and I were on active duty when we had our first child - returning to work was NOT an option - hubby has always been there right alongside me, supporting my career and helping to take care of the household. Sharing all the duties of a marriage is what makes it strong.

[Sour Lemon]

This "newborn" is six years old now. Hopefully they figured things out.

[SmilingBluEyes]

Mu husband had similar anxiety. I decided time came to leave him alone with the baby so I would take trips to Barnes and Noble or run errands and give him no choice. Guess what? He got really, really good at caring for his own son. Fathers do not " babysit"; it's called parenting. Give him no choice for limited amounts of time. He will figure it out. I also strongly caution you never to correct anything he does when caring for your baby, even if it's something you would not do (safety considered). Don't criticize him. He will have his own way of doing things and soon, you will have the ability to leave the baby with him, worry-free for you both!

Congratulations and best wishes.