I have a fairly loaded question that I'm hoping will receive helpful and realistic feedback from a variety of experienced nurses. I have recently been accepted to an RN program in St. Pete, FL and though I'm really excited, I have some concerns about the workplace environment for someone such as myself.
I'm a 25 yr old recently engaged female that likes to take care of herself. My fiance works as an AA (anesthesiologist assistant) at a hospital and has been working for 3 years at the same hospital and told me about the amount of sexual harassment that occurs especially towards new young women such as myself, regardless of whether they're married or not. He tells me that there is little anyone can do about it because that's the kind of common behavior (slapping other people's behinds, making forward comments, showing pictures on cellphones of sexual content, etc.) that occurs at all hospitals. Most times, according to him, new young females are powerless against this and if they try to report it, could easily get fired (I suppose if the harasser is of a higher authoritative position). I have no idea about this kind of environment, I'm just starting out, I know that I'm a mature person that doesn't put up with nonsense such as this.
So what I'm asking all of the nurses out there is, in your experience, has there been a high rate of sexual harassment among coworkers in your workplace? Are there effective protocols to report this? Is there a REALISTIC way for someone such as myself to avoid becoming a victim of this? Thanks!
Your fiance has an active imagination. Or he is the perpetrator of such harassment. Or he has a particularly smarmy way of trying to control you. Regardless, he's not giving you an accurate picture of hospital life. An occasional off-color joke or double entendre maybe but naked pictures and sexting? He's dreaming.
Your fiance has an active imagination. Or he is the perpetrator of such harassment. Or he has a particularly smarmy way of trying to control you. Regardless, he's not giving you an accurate picture of hospital life. An occasional off-color joke or double entendre maybe but naked pictures and sexting? He's dreaming.
In my experience, the fiancée may be projecting.It is the case of the boyfriend that is fooling around/behaving badly that is always hounding his girlfriend about an imagined infidelity on her part.And if this abuse actually is going on, why is he so gutless to not be reporting it as it is illegal? That he does not do so, shows a big fail on his part as a human being. Really, do you want him working in that environment?Injustice thrives when good people do and say nothing.
I think the docs pretty much know who they can slap on the butt and who they can't. They are not that dumb. They don't want to be involved in a very lucrative out of court cash settlement for sexual harassment.
I have to say that you may reexamine your relationship with your fiance, because, he is someone who may not be trusted due to his exaggerating stories. You will always encounter someone who has dirty jokes to say and dirty comments, this is inappropriate and unprofessional and as the person before me said, the best way to combat that kind of behavior is to distance yourself from it. By the way it is not only men who talke smutty, I have heard many female nurses do the same, it puts a bad reputation on health care professionals. So do not be one of them, be above them and distance yourself from them. Empower yourself, be secure with yourself and do not worry about this topic, because how your fiance described it is no where how it is and if it is occurring, and it bothers him, he should have reported it a long time ago to his supervisor. OSHA requires that all places of employment provide inservicing about harrassment in the work place which includes harrassment of any kind. I think there are bigger issues here than just whether or not to go into nursing. Examine you life, your relationship with your fiance and wether or not you can be a strong person who is satisfied with herself. If nursing is what you really want to do, go for it, this topic is so minor in the scope of everything else that you will have to deal with in nursing. Oh, and if I had someone slap my butt, yeah, it wouldn't happen again, I would press sexual harrassment charges so fast their head would spin, I do not care if it were a doctor, nurse, management they would do ever do it again. But do understand depending upon the specialty that you go into you can get some really obnoxious patients that will say some off beat things to you, it comes with the job and you learn how to handle them, the drunks and drug addicts in the ER are the best for doing this kind of behavior.
it is not about us, it all about the patient and we are here for the patient, so every one needs to get over themselves and be a team and give the best care ever to the patient and support each other, thank each other for help, for a job well done, for a job done under tough circumstances and keep a healthy sense of humor.
No one can make you feel weak unless you agree with them
In time, For me I realized there are no victims only willing participants.
If you are referring to sexual harassment in these statements I must emphatically disagree. I was not a 'willing participant' when my 350lb pharmacist manager pinned me up against a counter when nobody was around and harassed me, and believe me in those 5 minutes of absolute terror, I felt weak but I did not in any way agree with him or agree to be treated that way.
Not all harassment is invited, provoked, or precipitated by misleading behaviors, and it is not always within our power to prevent or stop it.
That being said, in response to OP's comment, I have worked in many areas including hospitals, LTC, assisted living, retail, etc etc, and the pharmacy is the only time I have EVER experienced, or even witnessed, sexual harassment. I would definitely take the advice of other comments in here and explore the motivation behind your fiancé's comments. Nursing can be a very rewarding career, and if it is what you want to do, don't let the threat of sexual harassment stand in your way. You're just as likely to experience it anywhere else. Best of luck!
Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
Your fiance has an active imagination. Or he is the perpetrator of such harassment. Or he has a particularly smarmy way of trying to control you. Regardless, he's not giving you an accurate picture of hospital life. An occasional off-color joke or double entendre maybe but naked pictures and sexting? He's dreaming.
I couldn't agree more.......sounds like Mr. Casanova doesn't want to share his playground. I have worked in intimate work settings....including sleeping in the same room due to 24 hour shifts (when we were able to sleep). While some of our behavior might raise a few eyebrows as inappropriate by the traditional work place......we by NO means show each other picture sexually explicit pictures or "slap each others bottom's" in a provocative aggressive manner.
Do people "hook up"? Yes.........(and frankly I believe you should NEVER "relieve" yourself where you eat) but never against anyone's will.
Your significant other is either a perpetrator, willing participant......or a great story teller.
Do you get asked out? Yes......but that is not harassment. The perceived Casanova of the facility, always looking for a yes, will approach the "New" kid on the block. Looking for a yes.....Asking someone for a little somethin, somethin isn't harassment. I was asked once.....I told the I was easy but I wasn't cheap......they laughed and sad "Oh no we go nice place" I corrected him when I told him I wanted his vintage jag convertible......he bust out laughing "She easy she no cheap....she want my jag!!!!" He never asked again.
To say ou are independent ,but feel helpless when it comes to sexual harassment is contradictory. I think it is your fiancé who has some skeletons he is afraid may be exposed by you being in the same organization as himself. Maybe i am reaching too far, but don't be surprised at the surprised responses you get if you tell our coworkers he is your fiancé. I've seen this happen many times....e.g. Joe in OR is my fiancé. What not big poppa joe...lol
FlyingScot, RN
2,016 Posts
Your fiance has an active imagination. Or he is the perpetrator of such harassment. Or he has a particularly smarmy way of trying to control you. Regardless, he's not giving you an accurate picture of hospital life. An occasional off-color joke or double entendre maybe but naked pictures and sexting? He's dreaming.