I have a fairly loaded question that I'm hoping will receive helpful and realistic feedback from a variety of experienced nurses. I have recently been accepted to an RN program in St. Pete, FL and though I'm really excited, I have some concerns about the workplace environment for someone such as myself.
I'm a 25 yr old recently engaged female that likes to take care of herself. My fiance works as an AA (anesthesiologist assistant) at a hospital and has been working for 3 years at the same hospital and told me about the amount of sexual harassment that occurs especially towards new young women such as myself, regardless of whether they're married or not. He tells me that there is little anyone can do about it because that's the kind of common behavior (slapping other people's behinds, making forward comments, showing pictures on cellphones of sexual content, etc.) that occurs at all hospitals. Most times, according to him, new young females are powerless against this and if they try to report it, could easily get fired (I suppose if the harasser is of a higher authoritative position). I have no idea about this kind of environment, I'm just starting out, I know that I'm a mature person that doesn't put up with nonsense such as this.
So what I'm asking all of the nurses out there is, in your experience, has there been a high rate of sexual harassment among coworkers in your workplace? Are there effective protocols to report this? Is there a REALISTIC way for someone such as myself to avoid becoming a victim of this? Thanks!
Sexually harassed by Orthopedist employer (when I was all of 15, and worked as his BABYSITTER).
Had a surgeon (who was at least 15 yrs older than I) ask me out at work when he was separated from his wife. Eww. As if. I was let off that uncomfortable hook when he told me they were reconciling!
Had a cardiologist approach me at work (at my med cart), and ask me if "I tasted as good as I looked ." Double Eeeew. I ran into a pts. room to hide! He later apologized.
Was called into a stairwell by a cardiology fellow (married) who awkwardly hugged me, and said something that I can't recall! WEIRD!
How this story ends: I married a cardiologist. For 15 yrs. He left me for his 17 yr younger PA!
Specializes in Cardiology, Cardiothoracic Surgical.
This puzzles me. I have worked in retail, food service, and as a professional before entering nursing school, and I was only propositioned once by a fellow coworker to join him and his wife (eww x 10). I have never seen the behavior your fiance
describes in the hospital; I have only experienced the utmost respect from residents, doctors and collaborative staff.
I have heard of one incident in my program where a nurse aide said something 'blue' to one of my classmates, and quickly found himself at the wrath of the primary RN, the charge nurse, and the instructor. It never happened again.
Patients are more likely to make comments than staff ever are.
In over 20 years I had occasion to be in literally dozens of clinical environments as a staff nurse and a flight nurse, including ORs, EDs and critical care units. These can be some adrenaline packed places. I never, ever, witnessed anything remotely approaching what you are describing. Your fiance is misleading you, and I think you should investigate why that might be.
I've been hugged by a few, but not lingering. Were they wanting a little netglow time? Sure, probably. LOL. I realize they cannot help themselves I am certainly not as young as the OP but still a hottie - I know when I am being harassed, and it's never got even close with anybody in my entire work life. But CherylRNBSN, funny two of the hugs were from cards. They awkwardly hug, don't they.
I was once asked to lunch while riding the elevator on my way up to an interview by an MD I did not know who happened to be just riding the elevator with me and we had waited on the ground floor for the elevator together. We just had chatted on the way up and he introduced himself and in very good manor asked me if I would like to have lunch with him in the cafe as he was on his way up to eat. I was surprised, and declined and just said I was on my way to a meeting - which I was.
I guess I just offered that one up to say that it's not harassment in my book.
Specializes in burn ICU, SICU, ER, Trauma Rapid Response.
In the few cases of sexual harassement I have observed in the hospital, and there have only been a few, it was the new young women who were the perpetrators, not the victims.
well unfortunately both females and males staff have had verbal or potential for physical abuse, this is more apparent in emergency or psychiatric areas. or for nurses who work in the community
Specializes in cardiac CVRU/ICU/cardiac rehab/case management.
It may be worth exploring trust issue with your b/f.
Additionally, examine also the gambit of his motives .... from truth based, protective?, to.....jealous? guilty? or controlling?
Harassment /predatory behavior is about using power to dominate. Why your b/f would see you or others as potentially powerless is the very thing that creates victims.
Pretty/young or both have absolutely nothing to do with this abuse of power. Predators look for 2 things-Opportunity and Fear.
While there is a disparity of power between genders,violence will still prevail, irrespective of work location
However,how we respond to it determines the difference. No one can make you feel weak unless you agree with them
Own your own power.
In my 20yrs I have heard many lewd comments, usually from pts . As a younger nurse it unnerved me,because I didn't quite know how to respond. In retrospect I think I felt scared not knowing how to "fight back "Then I began to see that only people who themselves feel weak feel the need to put others down . Predators feel powerless so they seek power. Sexy/ good looks does not equal powerless.
I will be straight up honest here. I lived many yrs in a co-dependent fashion - allowing others needs to supersede mine, I was fearful of conflict and setting boundaries .The "pay off " with this behavior is that I never had to take responsibility for my own life.I got to tell myself, "I am a giver and a peace loving soul" . Like all guises it kept me from the truth or the need to change.
I do not assume you are co dependent . What I can tell you is that my being afraid of conflict and boundaries probably attracted a lot more lewd comments than my co workers got.It also made work as a whole more difficult . In time, For me I realized there are no victims only willing participants.
I took responsibility for my life. When you no longer blame outside forces for your life you get to be an adult (and it is not defined by chronological yrs ). It is often described as "finding your own voice ". When you have it , there is no longer fear in defending yourself because you recognize you have become the author of your own life and how that story is told. I have zero tolerance now for anyone sexual or otherwise attempting to make me feel small and I would have absolutely no issue with reporting harassment of any kind. For anyone to suggest that you are powerless ,ever, indicates that they have either not outgrown their own victim hood mentality or have a vested interest in keeping you in one. (conscious or otherwise )
Fearing anything is saying it is more powerful than you. It may merit a little introspection on your part "How do you respond to inequalities of power ? " because until you know what real power is someone else will have power over You (either through unfair work assignments, conflict with pt or co workers, holiday picks etc )
If any of this resonates for you, I hope it's helpful. If not...then a lot of people just got to know me better:::::chuckle::::
I am certainly not as young as the OP but still a hottie 
- I know when I am being harassed, and it's never got even close with anybody in my entire work life. But 
CherylRNBSN
182 Posts
Wait!!
I've seen it!!
Sexually harassed by Orthopedist employer (when I was all of 15, and worked as his BABYSITTER).
Had a surgeon (who was at least 15 yrs older than I) ask me out at work when he was separated from his wife. Eww. As if. I was let off that uncomfortable hook when he told me they were reconciling!
Had a cardiologist approach me at work (at my med cart), and ask me if "I tasted as good as I looked ." Double Eeeew. I ran into a pts. room to hide! He later apologized.
Was called into a stairwell by a cardiology fellow (married) who awkwardly hugged me, and said something that I can't recall! WEIRD!
How this story ends: I married a cardiologist. For 15 yrs. He left me for his 17 yr younger PA!
Believe me, it ALL happens.