"You look tired"

[nickel78]

How do you all respond to this comment from patients? I work 7a-7p busy med surg, and have baby that wakes up several times a night. I can't help being tired, but these comments irritate me,

[anotherone, BSN, RN]

i am pretty pale and get puffy eyes and dark circles too. very noticiable . i use a variety of cosmetic products. some times it helps alot! other times barely and they do melt away before the shift is done and i never touch up at work.

[SHGR, MSN, RN, CNS]

Sometimes I got this comment from very nice patients who just liked me, and wanted to say something nice. I tried to take it in a good light.

[nursewithskills]

That comment irritates me as well.

Another nurse told me this one day and the funny part was she looked

even more tired than I, her eyes looked like she just work up, really.

They don't need to know your business. Like one post said, don't give them anything to gossip about.

I might say, "Oh, really." And keep it moving...

[teeniebert, LPN]

"Sweet, 'tired' was the look I was going for today!"

[Multicollinearity, BSN, RN]

I have heard this before, and it hadn't occurred to me to be irritated. I took it as a way of blabbing to me...maybe acknowledgement that I was working really hard. Unless said in a critical or negative tone of voice, this wouldn't bother me at all.

[Kooky Korky, BSN, RN]

Don't admit to being tired and don't mention the baby or other personal matters. It can lead only to no good.

Just tell them you've got Ebola or something.

[Orange Tree]

Try skipping in and out of their rooms. No one looks tired when they're skipping.

[Hygiene Queen]

Some patients are just showing concern for the people they know are working hard for them.

Bless my dear geriatric patients.

[JMBnurse]

Some patients are just showing concern for the people they know are working hard for them.

Bless my dear geriatric patients.

Exactly...this is usually uttered by the elderly and in their own way, they just feel bad because they see us running around and they worry about us.

I might say, "Ha ha ha! I do?? Well, then I look better than I feel!! Ha ha ha ha! Then change the subject.

[imintrouble, BSN, RN]

If I didn't look tired, nobody would recognize me.

[Anna Flaxis, BSN, RN]

I interpret a comment like this from a patient as an attempt to show concern, and it shows that they see you as a human being, not just some faceless servant/robot/maid. I think that's a *good* thing. If you're hearing it a lot, then you probably DO look tired.

When a patient makes this observation to me, I simply take a deep breath, relaxing all my upper body and facial muscles as I exhale (which I find are usually tense/tight when someone makes this observation), smile at them, and say something like "Yes, I am tired.", while giving them a touch on the hand or shoulder to show I appreciate the concern, then change the subject and put the focus back on their care.

[DSkelton711]

I am tired and look it I am sure. Most people say it just out of observation not meant to hurt or irritate, I think. Take it as a hint to maybe try and take 5 minutes when you can get it, to do something to refresh yourself really quick--some fluids, some deep breaths, stretching, clear your mind. Then when you are at home, make sure to let anyone who offers help with the baby or the house--actually help out. I was really bad at feeling like I HAD to do it all and didn't really let hubby do his fair share. Now I know better. He might do things different from you but that is okay. Just make sure to get yourself some rest and "me" time to recharge and rejuvenate. If you truly feel and look tired on a continual basis, make sure to rule out anything medical like anemia or thyroid or any other problem.