"My Mom Can't Sleep!"

talaxandra · Jun 11, 2008

Hey, at least mum's blasting her annoying, get in your face, nit-picky annoying family!

And no - common sense is hardly common at all. Sadly.

Virgo_RN, BSN, RN · Jun 11, 2008

How irritating. Glad the patient spoke up!

flashpoint · Jun 11, 2008

That patient deserves a pat on the back! I have no issue with someone staying with a patient in the hospital, but only if they don't interfere with care. Sometimes I think that people think there is some magical force in hospitals that makes it possible to sleep even though they have the TV blasting and everyone in the family is there talking.

ONCRN84 · Jun 11, 2008

Families never realize how exhausting it really is for patients to have visitors all the time. I'm glad the patient spoke up!

A nurse I was working with the other day was not so nicely informed by her patient's husband that he was staying with her all night and we needed to find him a bed. Um, no. You can stay, but this isn't the Hilton. We're at capacity and the only way you're getting a cot or a foldout chair bed thing is if someone dies and leaves it to you in their will. And if a family member of someone who IS dying needs it, they get it first. And the only reason you don't have a roommate and we're letting you stay is because she's a rule out c-diff and in precautions. As soon as it's ruled out, she's open to admit.

Ugh. I hate being a jerk when people just don't get it.

Diary/Dairy, RN · Jun 11, 2008

That is AWESOME!@!@ Bout time she told them!! Too bad they blame you for it....

santhony44, MSN, RN, NP · Jun 11, 2008

Do people have any common sense at ALL? Pt finally blows up and says "I can't sleep because you guys are in here talking! When are you going to leave???"

:yeah:

Good for Mom, even if they didn't listen!!

What a bunch of doofi!!:chuckle

miko014 · Jun 11, 2008

Hey, at least mum's blasting her annoying, get in your face, nit-picky annoying family!
And no - common sense is hardly common at all. Sadly.

Yeah, she did say something...finally! this is the end of her second week here. By the way, family didn't leave - but they did stop talking for a while. We're still getting yelled at about everything, Like why in the world do the mashed potatoes come with gravy one them??? I don't know, perhaps because you ordered "mashed potatoes and gravy"? :stone

Virgo_RN, BSN, RN · Jun 11, 2008

Reminds me of the "dressing change" family. I was doing my assessment on a really nice LOL, and made the mistake of saying out loud that her dressing needed to be changed. It really wasn't a high priority, as the drainage was very small and dried, and there was no active drainage coming from her several day old incision.

She had a zillion IV meds and one dual lumen PICC, plus she was on TPN and lipids and it was tubing change day. I was outside the room laying out all the meds and trying to coordinate in my mind how I was going to get all those meds into her in the most efficient and timely manner. I was checking off the TPN against the order. I was concentrating, and the family member came out of the room to ask if I was going to change the dressing. I told them no, that would be later, and that I had to do these medications now.

While I was in the middle of figuring out all of these meds, my patient next door started having chest pain. I had to put all of the meds back into their locked cabinet and immediately attend to the person having chest pain. Well, of course when someone has chest pain, you're going to be with them for at least fifteen minutes to a half an hour. So, I was giving her nitro and taking her vitals and asking her all kids of questions about her pain, and I stepped out of the room for just a second to go look at the tele monitor to see if her rhythm was doing anything different. No sooner did I step into the hallway, when the LOL's family member spotted me and asked me if I was going to do the dressing change! I told her no, that is not going to happen right now.

Chest pain resolves, and since the patient is not a candidate for intervention and the cardiologist has decided on medical management for her, I decided to call the doc and let him know that the patient was having frequent episodes of chest pain, and was there something we could be doing differently to treat it (since I don't have time to go in her room and go through the whole three nitro tabs in fifteen minutes routine every hour or so)? Of course, whenever I page a doc, I make sure to never then go off and get involved in something else, because the moment I do, the phone will ring and I do not want to miss that call.

So, I'm at the nurses' station, sitting for the first time in hours, waiting for the doc to return my call while catching up on a bit of charting. My plan was to go and give those IV meds I had been interrupted on before (I was still within my hour time window). A CNA came up to me to let me know that the family in room ### was wondering if I was going to do the dressing change!

After the doc called me back and I wrote the telephone order, I returned to my task of hanging all of those IV meds and changing the tubing and hanging the new bag of TPN. By that time, the family was hovering around Mom, who was sitting up on her bedside for the first time in hours. I was holding the PICC with one hand and getting ready to attach the TPN tubing with the other, when the daughter unexpectedly asked her Mom to stand up!

I wanted to throw them out of the room right then and there, but instead patiently explained that she should not stand up while I was holding onto her PICC line, and the reason why.

So, I get everything set up and the meds are going in, I've got a plan for the next bag as soon as this one finishes, etc., and I go off to check on my three other patients, who I barely saw that night because this lady's care was so time consuming. I could have done the dressing change while I was in there, but had been so focused on the meds that I didn't take the detour into the supply room to get the clean dressings, and by that time really felt that I needed to check on my other patients.

So, by now, it's ten o clock and I'm doing my ten o clock med pass, am behind on charting, and it looks like I may be staying late to finish up. Another nurse approaches me and tells me that the family in room ### is wondering about the dressing change.

I ended up asking another nurse who was all caught up if he could do it, and he did. But I learned my lesson. Never EVER comment that something needs to be done in front of the family. Make a mental note, put it on my brain sheet, but never utter the words aloud.

rnmomtobe2010 · Jun 11, 2008

I am not going to talk about the chick and her dude that were sharing a room with me while I was going into labor with my son......

Hotflashn · Jun 11, 2008

Devil's advocate: The family probably wanted mom to take a sleeping pill and be knocked out so they would be off the hook (having done their duty) and they could go on their way knowing she was KOed for the night. The fact is THEY WERE TIRED. They wanted to sleep but couldn't. Worry and exhaustion frazzles everyone, clouds judgment and makes everybody less able to cope. Lashing out and complaining about petty things (like the gravy!) is pretty well to be expected - the staff is an easy (though undeserving) target. After all, they can't really get mad at mom for being sick, but you can take it out on innocent strangers. Its their mommy, maybe their wife or sister. They are scared and upset, and undoubtedly exhausted.

Not saying it is right, just human nature. I know I have taken things out of innocent people (hospital staff, customer service, my family, my friends, whoever) when I have been scared and stressed. Its easier to complain about the petty stuff then to get right down to the real issues!! They are just too much. Easier to think the menu is the end of the world than deal with the real stuff! Your job with this patent will end soon, but for this family the work will just be getting started when they face how they are going to cope at home!

Grow yourself some thick skin or invest in some Vaseline so you can let it roll! That won't be the last time you see that kind of behavior. I promise.

frodo · Jun 11, 2008

IT is very hard not to take things personally when we are exhausted as well as the family, its a catch 22. Hotflashn has it correct though. I often take a little time with the family and ask them when are they going to eat, or sleep. the little tlc often helps. and yes, we have been very busy this winter, 6 to 7 pts a noc on med floor. the extra tlc often helps the family understand that they are being cared 4 too.