"My Mom Can't Sleep!"

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Do people have any common sense at ALL? Seriously, this family, who is unhappy about EVERYTHING and lets us all know it, is really at the limit right about now! Last night "You've got to do something NOW. Mom is really tired, and she can't sleep. Something's not right here, you have to do something. There's no reason she shouldn't be able to sleep!" On and on and on. Finally the nurse goes in (not my pt) and asks them what's up. Family says "Look at her! She's been complaining how tired she is all day long, and she can't sleep!" Nurse asks pt what's wrong, pt just shrugs. Nurse asks pt if she wants a sleeping pill. Pt says no. Family jumps all over that "she has to take it! Mom you have to take it you need some rest and you've been trying to sleep for 2 hours and you can't!" Pt finally blows up and says "I can't sleep because you guys are in here talking! When are you going to leave???" Nice, huh??? Worst thing? Family still says it's our fault!

Specializes in ICU.

I had a young guy on the vent the other night who needed lots of sedation. His family was very panicky and he wouldn't get agitated with them weeping over his every move. He started biting down on his tube and of course the vent started alarming. He still had good sats so I went and got some Ativan. While I was drawing it up and administering it, his brother started reading me the alarms from the vent. "It says to check the patient." I smiled and nodded. "Now it says circuit disconnect. Are you going to check the patient?" He said it real snotty like and then the rest of the family all gathered round and had a whispered conference and glared at me. "She's way too young to be a nurse and obviously doesn't know what she's doing. She didn't reconnect anything. Maybe we should find someone else." Yes, I can hear you clearly. I was so steamed that I couldn't actually say anything without cussing them out. :angryfire

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Specializes in Assisted Living, Med-Surg/CVA specialty.
I had a young guy on the vent the other night who needed lots of sedation. His family was very panicky and he wouldn't get agitated with them weeping over his every move. He started biting down on his tube and of course the vent started alarming. He still had good sats so I went and got some Ativan. While I was drawing it up and administering it, his brother started reading me the alarms from the vent. "It says to check the patient." I smiled and nodded. "Now it says circuit disconnect. Are you going to check the patient?" He said it real snotty like and then the rest of the family all gathered round and had a whispered conference and glared at me. "She's way too young to be a nurse and obviously doesn't know what she's doing. She didn't reconnect anything. Maybe we should find someone else." Yes, I can hear you clearly. I was so steamed that I couldn't actually say anything without cussing them out. :angryfire
Too young to be a nurse? I see your 28... Do they expect all nurses to be 50+ or something?
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Specializes in Medical.

Maybe she just looks young - all that time indoors and on shift work minimises your exposure to aging sun rays, you know!

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Sorry hotflashn and frodo. I didn't realize that we were all supposed to be perfct angels 24/7, and that we're not allowed to vent. Who said I didn't keep my cool? Who said I snapped, yelled, or threw the family out? If you'll notice, it wasn't even my pt that night (thank God). Just to give you an idea of the magnitude of this family's behavior, even the doc was fuming tonight and saying that "she needs to go - she's driving me up the wall! I feel sorry for you guys!" And this is the nicest, most patient doc you'll ever meet.

Next time someone asks me if I went to nursing school at Retarded University, I'll just smile and remind myself that they are probably "really upset right now". The next time someone throws their call light at me because the sound of the helicopters landing keeps them up at night, I'll just apologize profusely for the distrubance and work on moving the landing pad to a more convenient location. The next time someone tells me at 4 o'clock that they will have my license if I don't have their PRN meds there at 9 o'clock "on the dot", I'll just remind myself that they probably don't feel well.

Yes, all those are true stories, but my point is, I don't care what you're going through, you need to respect other people. And the point of the thread was to blow off a little steam. If you don't want to do that, I suggest that you stay away from threads with "VENT:" as the subject. I hope you don't think I'm trying to be rude, because I'm not, but I don't think I did anything wrong by postnig this issue here. Also, nothing makes people angrier and more stressed out than other people acting like their problems are worthless, meritless, and/or wrong. :twocents:

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Specializes in Cardiac Telemetry, ED.

Hm. That's not really what I took away from hotflashnrn and frodo's posts. I can see both sides of things. The fact is, the interpersonal communications skills are a huge part of our job. No, that doesn't make your frustrations worthless or invalid.

The way I look at it, I expect that when people are in the hospital, they are there because they are having a health crisis. When people are having a health crisis, they are not going to be at their best. I don't expect them to be. When people, despite being sick, scared, in pain, ARE at their best as human beings, well....I feel privileged to take care of them.

No, that absolutely does NOT mean I don't get frustrated by the behavior of patients or their families. I am a human being with human failings, after all. Taking a few minutes in the med room to count to ten and take some deep breaths helps. Coming here to vent helps. But in the end, I do remind myself that a huge part of my job is that interpersonal stuff.

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I got yelled at for carrots the other day. The patient apparently likes the round ones and not baby carrots. Their mother was devastated over the carrots. She should take a walk over to ICU. It might perk her up some.

I don't think families realize how tired the patient truly is. I tell them the patient needs their rest and they do as well. I urge them to go home and get some sleep (when patients aren't critical) as well. When family members are being loud at night and patients can't sleep I tell them the talking will keep them up so if they are going to stay they need to be quiet.

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Specializes in Medical.

I didn't read anyone saying you yelled, snapped or threw anyone out - though I would've been sorely tempted to do all three! I think those members who posted alternate views were trying to be helpful, perhaps not realising that you're well aware that the family are worried and stressed and needed to vent, not an explanation of why they were being heinous. And it sounds like they were well above average on the pain-in-the-neck-or-anatomical-points-further-south scale. Sorry you had such a stressful experience.

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Specializes in ICU.
Too young to be a nurse? I see your 28... Do they expect all nurses to be 50+ or something?

I look young. It drives me crazy. I've got two kids and two bachelor's degrees, but I'm often mistaken for a teenager. Grr. I'll love it in ten more years though when I get mistaken for a 28 year old. :)

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Specializes in being a Credible Source.
Family still says it's our fault!

Well you shouldn't lock them in the room anymore :D

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miko014 I am sorry you feel this way, I bow out, i will stop posting....

you did nothing wrong to post your issue, i didn't know i did either.

just expressing my view. and if you dont think i get yelled at constantly, think again.

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Specializes in Med/Surg, ED, ortho, urology.

I was actually thinking while reading that she probably couldn't sleep because of the noise the family were making, glad she told them!

Although some people will not "hear" stuff like that.

On another side, after working my first night shift I realised how much sleep the patients miss out on. It made me realise that night time is not as long as I thought it was. I know that 8 hrs is 8 hrs, but I guess I just had this whole, night time is longer concept :)

Then there are the pt's that complain about not sleeping at all, even though when you go to check on them are actually snoring.

When I did my CCU/HDU placement, we had taped report, and this one nurse actually recorded the pt snoring, as he was always complaining that he didn't sleep a wink each night.

It was really funny, in the middle of report, hearing this guy snoring and the nurse whispering "This is Mr. X, if he tells you he didn't sleep last night, this is the proof that he did!"

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II know that 8 hrs is 8 hrs, but I guess I just had this whole, night time is longer concept :)

Then there are the pt's that complain about not sleeping at all, even though when you go to check on them are actually snoring.

It was really funny, in the middle of report, hearing this guy snoring and the nurse whispering "This is Mr. X, if he tells you he didn't sleep last night, this is the proof that he did!"

Meh, I dunno. I don't think "8 hrs is 8 hrs" when it comes to sleep. Think about it. 8 hours of peaceful, restful sleep is different from 8 hrs of light sleep where you keep waking up all the time. I know people can't get rest in the hospital, and I know they need it. I'm sorry it has to be that way, but I can't do much about it. Can you?

I do love the ones who sleep all day and then complain that they can't sleep at night. Those are my favorites, lol!

I like that nurse who taped him snoring. Brilliant!!!!!

We got a P-G survey back recently that rated our room decor at a "1". Why? According to the comments, "there was too much medical equipment in my room"...:icon_roll!!!!! I dare you to make that guy happy, lol!!!!!

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