"I'm going to sue you", What do you say?

[DutchgirlRN, ASN, RN]

This has happened to me soooo many times but especially during the past year. One particular time I told the doctor and he came straight over and DC'd the patient and told the family not to ever darken his doorway again that he would not put up with patients or their families threatening the nurses. Go doc !!! You rock !!!

Yesterday the twin brother of a patient said "I'm an attorney and I may consider suing".

Several months ago, "If you don't do as I ask I'll sue you, where's a phone book so I can look for an attorney".

People obviously think this scares me. It doesn't. It's kinda like threatening to go AMA. So what, go ahead, you're only hurting yourself I want to say. What I really say is....... What you're not realizing is threatening to go AMA is not a threat to me only to your health and to your finances.

Back to the subject......I tell patients/family members "I can only follow the doctors orders and if you feel as though you need to call an attorney then please do whatever you feel you need to. I'm not concerned that I've done anything illegal".

I wish more doctors would throw patients out on their can for threatening!!!

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

I've actually never had a patient say "I'm going to sue you.", but I have had them say things like "I'm going to sue this hospital" or "I'm going to sue that doctor". My response has been "you do whatever it is you feel you need to do. However, that's not my concern, I'm here to...................is there anything I can do further for you, etc....". Or I just let the patient vent and rant away, often that's all they need to do. Then I can carry on.

[sirI, MSN, APRN, NP]

First of all, let me start out this post by saying I do NOT advocate doing what I did.

When I was a whole lot younger. Very young nurse in OB, I had had a horrible month of most difficult deliveries.

One night, after we had worked so very hard to save this girls' life, and, after everything was over and the mom and baby were doing wonderfully, the father (the girls' father) followed me outside the hospital.

He looked at me and said, "I'm thinking about suing you."

I said, "My name is XXXXX..........please be sure you spell it right."

[hollykate]

I've never been told directly that I was to be sued, BUT, recently I was told by a family member that she was holding me responsible for her mother arriving home in one piece (see Phone calls thread). I was speechless, and the caller than hung up. Luckily, I know I am not responsible for the driving habits of a patient who had an oral antibiotic....but it still gives me pause, I'm quite nervous that someone will actually take the time to sue someday. most of the time it is an empty threat, that allows a patient/family member to vent out their stress.

[LydiaNN]

I agree with what Tweety said. "That's your decision to make". Just a neutral, non-inflammatory way of saying "Whatever. Now can we kindly get back to your treatment so I can get you the **** out of here?"

[jessica]

I think that you've been handling the situation well. Why do people simply not get the Golden Rule? As if it's a difficult concept to grasp. There are days that really get under my skin especially when pts or pt's families make comments like "I'm paying more to stay here then I do at the Four Seasons. I had better get good service." WTF??? Sorry....I got a bit side-tracked. Good Luck with those "types" of people.

[bethin]

First of all, let me start out this post by saying I do NOT advocate doing what I did.

When I was a whole lot younger. Very young nurse in OB, I had had a horrible month of most difficult deliveries.

One night, after we had worked so very hard to save this girls' life, and, after everything was over and the mom and baby were doing wonderfully, the father (the girls' father) followed me outside the hospital.

He looked at me and said, "I'm thinking about suing you."

I said, "My name is XXXXX..........please be sure you spell it right."

So did he end up suing you?

I've heard this said in the heat of the moment when a pt. or family member is either very mad or very upset. That is no time to make these kind of decisions. I'm afraid that if someone ever said they were going to sue me that I would have the same response as siri. When I feel threatened I get a smart mouth.

[Havin' A Party!, ASN, RN]

... He looked at me and said, "I'm thinking about suing you."

I said, "My name is XXXXX..........please be sure you spell it right."

Hi, Siri! Knowing you now and how professional you are, I'm sure you were very young at the time.

Actually, I can't even imagine you saying that!

[caroladybelle, BSN, RN]

They are just being manipulative, like children.

My favorite is "I'm gonna have your job", usually said by a male.

(please, take my job!!!!! But quite frankly, Honey, you don't have the balls to do my job)

[Havin' A Party!, ASN, RN]

Shouldn't comments like the ones mentioned here be addressed more directly though?

Something like: "You appear to be upset. Can I help you with anything?" Or anything to this effect.

This would give the patient (or whoever) the opportunity to state their specific prob, and provide us with some identifiable issue we may need to pass on or act on, if reasonable, to avoid or minimize any damage that might ensue.

Since the complaint may be legit, why not take advantage and learn where they're coming from at an early junction?

[grannynurse FNP student]

Funny, both times I was sued, I was not forewarned. By the way, I was dropped from one suit. The other one it took a judge to dismiss. Thank heavens I had my own attorney, provided by my own insurance.

To those that threaten, I tell them to do what they must. If it is a threat against the facility, I would warn risk management. Against a physician, I tell him.

Grannynurse

[sirI, MSN, APRN, NP]

So did he end up suing you?

I've heard this said in the heat of the moment when a pt. or family member is either very mad or very upset. That is no time to make these kind of decisions. I'm afraid that if someone ever said they were going to sue me that I would have the same response as siri. When I feel threatened I get a smart mouth.

No, he didn't, beth.

It was rather idiotic of me to make a statement like that. I remember feeling flushed and the hair on the back of my neck stand up. I even spelled out my name very slowly for him.

One of the dumbest things I've done/said in my life.

Youth and our mouths. We can do more damage with our mouths than any other part of our anatomy. I'm really lucky. Of course, we/I had nothing for which to be sued. He was upset with the course of events for his daughter and I suppose he vented his frustration with me.

I will never forget the look on his face when I did say it. I really didn't feel any better saying it and he probably didn't feel better telling me he'd sue me.

Loss all the way around.