"How are we doing today?"

OCNRN63, RN · Aug 9, 2015

We don't, eh? Aren't we considerate!

Yes, Iâ€‹ am.

gonzo1, ASN, RN · Aug 9, 2015

Just remember the person you were calling Hon, in a couple of hours you may be having to place a foley, give an enema, do digital disimpaction or give rectal tylenol. I always find it easier and less embarrassing to do these things if I haven't been all "smooshy smooshy" with the patient. Just my 2 cents.

BuckyBadgerRN, ASN, RN · Aug 10, 2015

I can honestly say I do not talk this way to my patients. It's not a WE, I only care about how they are feeling!

I was at a friend's house the other day. This friend of her husband's was there. He had a similar injury to what I sustained last winter and I hadn't seen him since I was in the early stages of recovery. He said "How are we doing today?" LOL.
I knew he was referring to my injury, but ignored that and said "We are doing fine. and how are we doing?" I couldn't help myself, I just have decided to be a smarty pants from now on in life. Then he got more specific and had we had a nice talk about our injuries, comparing notes.
Yet, when I talk to my patients, I find myself just naturally slipping into the same vernacular. "How are we feeling today?" "We're going to need a urine sample" yadda yadda yadda...
Why do we just naturally talk this way to patients. It's like nurse baby talk. Any thoughts?

nrsang97, BSN, RN · Aug 10, 2015

I ask "How are you feeling?" to the patients. I do say "we need a urine, blood, stool sample" usually because I need to send it and the doc wants it.

Why on earth does the MA call someone "mom" who isn't with their child for an appointment? The MA's do that at my son's pedi office, but nowhere else.

odaat · Aug 10, 2015

I think that the "mom" thing is for my childs benefit, like "ok you sit right here and mom will sit right beside you" or something along those lines. I don't know, they've always referred to me as mom and it's never bothered me.

Edited to add: I much prefer mom to being called Mrs. My childs last name because we have different last names and I will sooooo never carry that last name myself! And I imagine that's pretty common so maybe it's just easier to say "mom" than assume the parent and kid have the same last name?

f1j1nurse · Aug 10, 2015

We weren't on disability due to our good financial planning, with an emergency fund of 3-6 months per Dave Ramsey guidelines.

Love Dave Ramsey:) And yay to emergency funds:)

datalore · Aug 10, 2015

It's a regional thing here that people use "hun", "sweetheart" and "dear" a lot, even to strangers. I'm not from here, and it seriously freaked me out when I first arrived. My patients, male and female, often call me those names very often. I'm just waiting for it to slip out of my own mouth from sheer overexposure at some point. Sigh.

NursesRmofun, ASN, RN · Aug 10, 2015

I don't literally say, "How are WE feeling?" I say, "How are you doing?", usually....but that usually is my starter. I never call anyone "Sweetie" or "Hon". I call my patients Mr. and Mrs. or Ms. so and so. I was agreeing though to the idea that I do start almost all my conversations with, "How are you doin'?" There is a way, a certain dialogue I follow.

DarkEyed · Aug 10, 2015

I used to work in a prison. Can you imagine the responses I would have gotten saying "honey" or "sweetie"?

Oh'Ello, BSN, RN · Aug 10, 2015

I have no problem with the Royal/Communal "we", and a number of my patients have remarked that they appreciate it. Perhaps it's the population, but most of our patients are alert, oriented, feeling like ****, and feeling like they're caged in some complicated experiment.

I disagree that "we" is patronizing, it implies participation when a lot of patients are feeling a loss of control. "We're going to start your chemo at 5pm"....I'm going to risk my health hanging it and you're going to get sick from it.... "Since we're having trouble getting you to urinate normally, We're going to place a catheter into the bladder to collect it for us." The patient can't pee, and I can't get them to, I'm going to place a foley and the patient is certainly a part of that... "How are we feeling today" The patient felt awesome yesterday but feels horrible today...and as a result I feel horrible about that. Not sure why we must

speak in I's and you's when nurse and patient are partners in care.

SubSippi · Aug 10, 2015

I hate it when annoying things I do are called to attention...it makes me start annoying myself. And that's no way to be...

scottaprn · Aug 10, 2015

In my first bachelor's degree I needed an extra couple hours and decided to take a PE class where the students taught pre-school children to play different games. Figured it would be a piece of cake (Yet another reason i was a dumb*** if you are keeping track).

I was the person who was in charge of teaching the first day. I stood up an proudly started "Today, we will learn how...". That is how far I made it into my speak before my 75 year old professor of Indian descent had (approximately 6) strokes in quick succession.

He sat me down and told me I couldn't teach anything if I didn't already know how to do it so saying "We will ..." should be embarrassing to me. He told me that he may speak English with an accent but when I spoke it in his classroom I would use it with correct grammar.

Funny how life works out. I went looking for a quick and easy grade and instead learned an English lesson that will stick with me forever.

Now if I could just hunt him up and help me break the habit of calling the patient's parents "Mom/Dad" instead of their real names I would be in business.