"Are you saved?" How do YOU deal with these types of questions

Nurses General Nursing

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I would love to hear from some more experienced ppl some ways to deal with these types of personal questions. In my region, there are many devout evangelical Christian people who I think are genuinely concerned about the state of my soul. When folks like this are in the hospital, they're also feeling vulnerable, and they probably want to discuss their faith with someone who can help them feel more grounded. I am not necessarily that person.

I get the questions, "Are you saved?" "What church do you go to?" "Have you accepted Jesus as your lord and savior?" etc. frequently in the hospital where I work. 1. I don't believe my personal religious stuff is my patients' business. 2. I do not want to be dishonest about my personal religious/lack of religious stuff.

So far, the best I've come up with is, "It sounds like Christ is important in your life. Tell me more about that."

Thoughts? Opinions?

Rebecca, that agnostic porterwoman :confused:

Specializes in 5 yrs OR, ASU Pre-Op 2 yr. ER.
Because if THEY are truly saved, it means they are trying to become more like Christ and less like a person who just lives in the flesh. (selfish, self-centered, materialistic, hedonistic, etc.) That is what it is about, this personal saving relationship with Jesus.

This is not what it's all about for some people.

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This is not what it's all about for some people.

What IS it about then?

AzMic: You asked about giving up my God. I really didn't read the question of the original post or the one I was asked as such.

But even if so, no, nothing puts me off on the job, number one, becuase it's my job, period.

I am paid to accept others opinions.

In my personal life, put off?, No, sorry, I would only feel sad that they didn't know the joy that I know, in my Lord.

Again, why would anyone infer that this means I must think others have no joy? I really don't understand that.

You ask what if the tables were turned? I'm not sure what that means, but if it means what I understand, they are turned, daily, almost constantly, and that was one of the points of my posts. Christians live in a secular world. Everything that ISN'T Christian surrounds me daily, but that's Ok, I don't even mind. I have what I want surrounding me in my own sanctuary of my home and my church.

What in particular in my post was "uncalled for"? I would be glad to revisit and reconsider my statements, but they may not change.

However, with just that general accusation, I can't respond.

Sorry for the typo Tweety, what I meant was that none of us have the right to be not offended. If your beliefs offend me and vice versa, oh well. That's why we live in America. But my employer is not paying me to discuss my POV with his clients.

Also, I'm confused about you describing our society as "Christian dominated"

By what are you measuring with? All the media is secular, (with exception of the dreaded "televangelists" :uhoh21: ) , and not even conservative. All around the country, cities are removing Christian's symbols, the sanctity of life is not upheld,etc. So how is it that Christianity is dominant?

And as far as "what church do you go to?", I think that's a "social" question as often as a spiritual one, unfortunately. Not meant to be any more offensive that, say, "where did you go to college". So why do people get upset by that?

AzMich, If you will re-read some of the thread that includes my posts, you will notice that my POV was related to the original question posted in the thread as I understood it: IE: a "religious" question or statement of a personal nature coming from a patient to a nurse.

I stated, IMHO, that Christians were happy and wanted others to be too! (and before anyone states that they know Christians who are not happy, please consider that maybe they are not Christians, have fallen away from their walk, or were never nutured in their walk to begin with, didn't grow, remained infants or even whithered and died)

This doesn't imply, nor is there any need to infer from that statement that people who are not Christian are not happy. And to me, for someone to infer that seems a little defensive.

I didn't say anything about shoving anything down anyones throat, first of all, because I wasn't dicussing my own "religious" beliefs, I was asked a hypothetical question by Rainbowskye, and I was answering, and have a right to that opinion, just like you do yours.

If people love chocolate ice cream, they might want to serve it to everybody around, but are not "offended" if someone chooses not to have any, or says, well, I HATE chocolate ice cream.

Now I've tried to be as friendly as I know how to answer these questions, but how about if I weren't? (Besides not showing a very good example of a Christian)

Think about it this way, what if I got really defensive and thought you were impying that I was dumb as a can of paint just becuase you asked me if I watched Nick and Jessica or America's Top Model last night? I mean, that would HAVE to be what you were saying between the lines right?

Oh, it isn't? Why not? If you think my happiness as a Chrisitan implies that I think there is something wrong with anyone who isn't, isn't that the same thing as above? If not, why not?

Do you really think that's what I said??? Anywhere??? (If so, please show me)

I hope I have covered all the questions or remarks directed at me. I know I won't have time to persue this thread much more in depth, because I know that these types of issues are never resolved to anyone's satisfaction, and can go on and on forever, with no real winners.

It has never been my intention to be DELIBERATELY offensive to anyone, ever, (since becoming a Christian that is, before, well, phew, I"ll tell ya about it one on one if you want to know) so if I have, please show me exactly where so I can respond.

Thank you and God bless, whether you believe in Him or not, He still loves you. Why should it offend anyone to be loved?

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what ever u do dont deny him

I would love to hear from some more experienced ppl some ways to deal with these types of personal questions. In my region, there are many devout evangelical Christian people who I think are genuinely concerned about the state of my soul. When folks like this are in the hospital, they're also feeling vulnerable, and they probably want to discuss their faith with someone who can help them feel more grounded. I am not necessarily that person.

I get the questions, "Are you saved?" "What church do you go to?" "Have you accepted Jesus as your lord and savior?" etc. frequently in the hospital where I work. 1. I don't believe my personal religious stuff is my patients' business. 2. I do not want to be dishonest about my personal religious/lack of religious stuff.

So far, the best I've come up with is, "It sounds like Christ is important in your life. Tell me more about that."

Thoughts? Opinions?

Rebecca, that agnostic porterwoman :confused:

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Specializes in critical care.
Kenni...

Why? Why would you prefer I have a God in my life? I am a happy person, I have lots of friends and family, I've been in the same relationship with my boyfriend for 16 years (and no, I don't like to rush into things :chuckle ), I have a great job that I love, I am absolutely fantastic at what I do, I love my patients and they love me, I am happy and content.

I am one of those nurses that my patients remember. I get cards and letters from patients and family members, they typically say they know I care about them and I do.

I was born and raised Christian. I finally came to terms with all of that and one day I acknowledged that I just don't believe in the Christian dogma. I tried, I tried my best. Since I quit trying so hard to believe I am happier now moreso than ever.

I'm a good person and that is my religion. When people ask and I can't dodge the question I generally answer that my religion is to be the best person I can possibly be. When I do something nice for someone else, it isn't a brownie point with a God. I do it because it is the right thing to do. No outside rewards, all the rewards I get come from within.

There are lots and lots of happy and content people that don't have a God. That's okay, it really is. I don't mean that in a snitty way, honestly I don't. I mean it literally. It just doesn't take a God to be happy and content with the way things are. It doesn't take a God or religion to have morality or care for your fellow human beings.

If there is a God and I am all wrong about this... well here is my feeling. If he cares more for how I worship him vs. how I live my life and treat those I can see, feel, and hear... I have no use for this God anyway.

Besides, if there is a God I just can't fathom how he would be so mean and heartless, arrogant and an egomaniac that his #1 concern for me is that I acknowledge him and put him before those that actually need me to be there for them in the here and now. That just doesn't make any sense.

I am a nurse, a daughter, a girlfriend, a sister, a friend, a concerned citizen, a volunteer, a person who donates time and money to worthy causes and people in need, and I am an atheist. Don't we really share more than you might think?

:yelclap: Well said! You rock sister!

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I think what you said was just fine. You didn't ask a question and you turned the conversation back on the patient. That's what we're taught to do. Sounds like maybe the patient wanted to talk about her own spirituality anyway!

I would love to hear from some more experienced ppl some ways to deal with these types of personal questions. In my region, there are many devout evangelical Christian people who I think are genuinely concerned about the state of my soul. When folks like this are in the hospital, they're also feeling vulnerable, and they probably want to discuss their faith with someone who can help them feel more grounded. I am not necessarily that person.

I get the questions, "Are you saved?" "What church do you go to?" "Have you accepted Jesus as your lord and savior?" etc. frequently in the hospital where I work. 1. I don't believe my personal religious stuff is my patients' business. 2. I do not want to be dishonest about my personal religious/lack of religious stuff.

So far, the best I've come up with is, "It sounds like Christ is important in your life. Tell me more about that."

Thoughts? Opinions?

Rebecca, that agnostic porterwoman :confused:

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Sounds like you did what you should've done - you didn't ask a question and you turned the question back around to the patient. He/She probably wanted to talk about him/herself anyway! You did the right thing.

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most of the time when someone asks you that they either want to put a feather in their hat before going over to the other side or, they need comforting from you. most people want to know who is actually taking care of them. are you a CHRIST fearing person or a devil worshiper? comfort. that' the name of the game. If you are a christian, just say so. Are you denying christ by not speaking up? If we put no God above our God and love one another...well, the rest will just fall into place.

I would love to hear from some more experienced ppl some ways to deal with these types of personal questions. In my region, there are many devout evangelical Christian people who I think are genuinely concerned about the state of my soul. When folks like this are in the hospital, they're also feeling vulnerable, and they probably want to discuss their faith with someone who can help them feel more grounded. I am not necessarily that person.

I get the questions, "Are you saved?" "What church do you go to?" "Have you accepted Jesus as your lord and savior?" etc. frequently in the hospital where I work. 1. I don't believe my personal religious stuff is my patients' business. 2. I do not want to be dishonest about my personal religious/lack of religious stuff.

So far, the best I've come up with is, "It sounds like Christ is important in your life. Tell me more about that."

Thoughts? Opinions?

Rebecca, that agnostic porterwoman :confused:

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most of the time when someone asks you that they either want to put a feather in their hat before going over to the other side or, they need comforting from you. most people want to know who is actually taking care of them. are you a CHRIST fearing person or a devil worshiper? comfort. that' the name of the game. If you are a christian, just say so. Are you denying christ by not speaking up? If we put no God above our God and love one another...well, the rest will just fall into place.

Then what should I, as a Buddhist do? Should I simply say I believe in a God? I do not worship the devil but I do not "worship" christ either.

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:yelclap: Well said! You rock sister!

I understand every thing you said but 9 times out of ten if you use to be a christian then you will finally go back to being one when times get so hard you wont have no one to call upon but Jesus! Its just a matter of time not judging you or anything but I cant see how no woman can truly be so happy with a boyfriend for 16 years you should be his wife no questions asked but since you like being the girlfriend I doubt if you become his wife a relationship like that 16 years he dont love you that much to make you his wife. But when men fail you Jesus has your back I take it if he leave you I bet you will find a God then! no disrespect but I will pray for you

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Kenni...

You write:

>>I don't mind discussing religion with others. I really don't care what denomination it is, but I prefer they had God somehow in their lives. it's when they start trying to TELL ME what I need to do and how I NEED TO CHANGE that I get upset.

You really don't see the problem? Honestly? You prefer I have a God in my life? Why? Are you better able to determine what is best for me? This is the point I am getting at. Christians do sometimes have this superiority thing and that is the thing that annoys others.

How would you feel if I said I prefer you not have God in your life? Am I better able to determine what is best for you? What's the difference between your preference that I have a God in my life and my supposed preference that you don't have one in yours?

Now do you see the point?

And JFTR, I am NOT claiming all Christians have this superiority complex, they don't. I'm merely making a point. Why should you prefer I have a God in my life? How does it affect your life which God or if I have a God in my life? How is it your business to wish such a thing for me?

I would NEVER say I wished you didn't have a God. That is the difference between us.

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I understand every thing you said but 9 times out of ten if you use to be a christian then you will finally go back to being one when times get so hard you wont have no one to call upon but Jesus! Its just a matter of time not judging you or anything but I cant see how no woman can truly be so happy with a boyfriend for 16 years you should be his wife no questions asked but since you like being the girlfriend I doubt if you become his wife a relationship like that 16 years he dont love you that much to make you his wife. But when men fail you Jesus has your back I take it if he leave you I bet you will find a God then! no disrespect but I will pray for you

HAHAHAHA!!!! Are you serious? Now you presume to know why we are not married? Since you didn't ask, I won't assume you want the truth, you made up your own truth and you seem to be quite happy with that. What is that they say about assumptions? :chuckle

Have you EVER noticed that only Christians make the assumption that atheists will go back to Christianity? I can no more believe in your God than I can believe in the myths Christianity was started from. Christianity isn't even an original myth, it's a copied myth. The virgin birth? Copied. Walking on water? Copied. One fish feeding the whole lot? Copied. All of it... copied from previous myths.

I know too much about the Christian history to ever go back. It would be like suddenly believing in the Easter bunny after I discovered the real truth. I'm not about to get into a debate about the history of Christianity. My point is that I just plain know too much to ever be able to believe in it again. The Dark Ages were dark for a reason. It served it's purpose well.

Christianity is fine for some people but these people that repeat what they hear without doing the least bit of research and assume we all call for God in foxholes, well.. you just couldn't be more wrong.

However I don't wish to mess with your reality, believe whatever works for you.

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This thread is really turning nasty.

It needs to be shut down, IMO.

This wasn't supposed to turn into Christians vs nonChrstians, it was originally a question about how to handle questions at work.

I am a Christian, but I posted earlier that I felt we should leave religion out of the workplace. It is not a level playing field between workers and patients.

So why not either get back on the subject or close it down. It's really taking a nasty turn, people are getting too upset over this.

Maybe this thread has outlived its usefulness???

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