I understand every thing you said but 9 times out of ten if you use to be a christian then you will finally go back to being one when times get so hard you wont have no one to call upon but Jesus! Its just a matter of time not judging you or anything but I cant see how no woman can truly be so happy with a boyfriend for 16 years you should be his wife no questions asked but since you like being the girlfriend I doubt if you become his wife a relationship like that 16 years he dont love you that much to make you his wife. But when men fail you Jesus has your back I take it if he leave you I bet you will find a God then! no disrespect but I will pray for you