Pt's C/O in the ER (funny)

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What are some funny C/O people have had coming into your triage area? Misspelled words too...

We had a lady come in the other night because she ate raw chicken -Claimed she didn't know it was raw.

Lots of people come in with soar throats.

We also had a mom who tried to spell diarrhea several times on the check in -Finally crossed it out and wrote S**Ts a lot.

Specializes in Emergency/Critical Care Transport.
Why can't they just say: "I don't want to go to work today...can I have a note?"

I'ld be happy to give them the note and get them the heck out of my ER!!!

Honesty would be so refreshing.

"I just wanna a work note and few percocet for the weekend."

I think I would just smile and hand it over. "Y'all have a nice day."

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Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

ED nurses SO rock.

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Specializes in Geriatrics/Oncology/Psych/College Health.
"I lost my tampon"......

Lol! :chuckle. We had a gal come thru the clinic who was swearing she left a tampon in and couldn't get it out. "I pull on it and I almost have it out and then it snaps back in." You guess it - she was trying to pull her cervix out. Required a pelvic exam and three people to assure her that there was NOTHING in there that she wasn't born with.

Why can't they just say: "I don't want to go to work today...can I have a note?"

I'ld be happy to give them the note and get them the heck out of my ER!!!

Oddly, since I work with college students, that's basically what many of our visits boil down to. You can tell the ones who aren't really sick by the fact that they ask for the note before anything else is said or done. We could make a mint and decrease our workload by installing a vending machine for those things.

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Just imagine the choices in the vending machine...

Work release...........................................press 1

Note for school........................................press 2

Note to sit on a$$....................................press 3

No lifting anything heavier than the remote...press 4

:angryfire

Vicodin......press 5

Darvocet...press 6

Valium.......press 7

:coollook:

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Specializes in Emergency Room.

My eyes hurt, and my co-worker gave me some of his eye drops. Now I can't see at all! I think I am going blind!" Pupil are very dilated..........pt drove himself to er............pt is a....CABDRIVER!

Moral of story.....don't take other people eye drops! (It'll wear off........it just has a half life of about 12 hours)

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Specializes in Emergency room, med/surg, UR/CSR.

"I lost my tampon"......

when the doc pulled a tampon out of this woman that she had "lost" three days prior. Talk about EEEEEEWWWWWW!

My eyes were actually watering. Has she never heard of using her fingers to dig it OUT! :rolleyes:

Is there a shudder icon?!

Never wanting to smell that again,

Pam :crying2:

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Specializes in ER, ICU, L&D, OR.
when the doc pulled a tampon out of this woman that she had "lost" three days prior. Talk about EEEEEEWWWWWW!

My eyes were actually watering. Has she never heard of using her fingers to dig it OUT! :rolleyes:

Is there a shudder icon?!

Never wanting to smell that again,

Pam :crying2:

Yuck, Glad I never have to work that part of ER

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Specializes in Emergency Room.
"Can you start my IV later? My daughter just brought me some chips and a coke." This from an abd pain pt that came in BY AMBULANCE. When I told her I had many other pts to care for, and I needed to get her IV started, she instructed her daughter to "drop the chips in my mouth while she does that."

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

you must work at my ED. the abdominal pains are the BIGGEST jokes!!!

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Specializes in ER, ICU, L&D, OR.

Father sends his 16 yo daughter in by EMS

he is right on their tail

and yelling she is having a heart attack

well we ask what happened sir

he responds her bf broke up with her and broke her heart

and she is having chest pain, I am a doctor I know she is having a heart attack

pts crying with resp rate of 60

well sir what kind of doctor are you

responds I am a doctor of theology

Ok sir, say a prayer for all of us then

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Father sends his 16 yo daughter in by EMS

he is right on their tail

and yelling she is having a heart attack

well we ask what happened sir

he responds her bf broke up with her and broke her heart

and she is having chest pain, I am a doctor I know she is having a heart attack

pts crying with resp rate of 60

well sir what kind of doctor are you

responds I am a doctor of theology

Ok sir, say a prayer for all of us then

Awwww...I feel bad for the poor little man...

:crying2:

And heck...with some of the docs I have had to deal with...his boss might be just what's needed!!!

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Specializes in ER, ICU, L&D, OR.

His boss can only help the situtation

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Specializes in Trauma, Teaching.

"I smoked marijuana all day and now I'm dizzy"......

How about, "I smoke marijuana every night, but I don't feel anything this time"

Just how does one restore the patient's favorite (but missing) response to street drugs? :uhoh3: :uhoh21:

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