Plucking a mental daisy

Published

So I went to nursing school with the idea of becoming an employed nurse to support my family better while doing something I love. I got a job right away at well known, respected hospital. Lust like most would do I packed up the family 60 miles away to be close to the job. I love my job, my facility, my unit and coworkers. I've been working for 1.5 years now. I'm unhappy on my days off. I'm lonely. I miss my family and friends. I miss the house we lived in. Just about every day I have an energy in my core that wants to move home n commute.

The commute woud be 60 miles about an hour and a half. I'd do it three days a week.

I can decided if giving up a house that is "alright" and in an area that I haven't met any friends (its been 1.5 years) but has a twenty minute communte to work.

Any input would be appreciated.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I hear ya! I relocated for a job and I hate it. Very lonely. My only friend is the guy at Starbucks, he totally brightens my day. Its also created an expensive coffee habit. I left my home and dragged my family here and now the hubby landed a great new job here. Now I hate mine and want to leave but I am trapped. At least you have a job you love, that is something to hang onto!

Is there a way you could move halfway? Like closer to your old social network and fav haunts, but not a total 1.5 hour drive? Do you work 12's? That would be an awful commute home after a 12. Is your old home available? Did you sell or rent?

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).

This is like Superman's Bizzaro World.

I, too, live far from work. I have no friends or family.

Here's the diff: I love it. As Henry David Thoreau said, "I've found nothing more companionable than solitude."

So. Here's my input: Get used to it or change it.

Dave

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I can possibly go back to the old house, it hasnt been rented.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Hospice / Psych / RNAC.

I use to commute because I wouldn't move into the city because of the kids. School, environment etc...need I say more anyway............my commute was > an hour and I loved the commute. I made it my time and got an extensive music collection and enjoyed the ride.

If you miss it that much I don't know what you're waiting for.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
This is like Superman's Bizzaro World.

I, too, live far from work. I have no friends or family.

Here's the diff: I love it. As Henry David Thoreau said, "I've found nothing more companionable than solitude."

So. Here's my input: Get used to it or change it.

Dave

Aw, Dave...Where's the love??? I thought we were ALL friends, here.............

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
Aw, Dave...Where's the love??? I thought we were ALL friends, here.............

Sorry, greenfiremajick. And an apology to you, too, Student2Registered, if I was taken as being unempathetic.

I read "Any input would be appreciated" and took it at face value. Tough Love. Say what you believe the Individual needs to hear. Even if it hurts.

Sorry.

(Down in the Dumps) Dave

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Trauma Surgery, Nursing Management.

S2R-

Move back. It is want you want deep down. You would be happier, and you seem to be good at looking at both sides of your dilemma. Follow what your heart tells you.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Home Care.

I've spent the majority of my adult life living far from home and relocating every few years. I've actually been in the same location now for 6 years. My family is 3400 miles away, including my children.

Making new friends takes time and effort. How much contact do you have with your coworkers? Have you joined a gym? Do you participate in hobbies or activities?

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I did the same thing--moved a hour and half away. I was lonely for my old job and went back and worked part time after several months. There were new people there with the old ones. The new ones thought at first when I was new that I didn't know anything and would start out trying to teach me. I had to keep telling them that I knew because I had worked there several years. That was frustrating. It wasn't the same and I quit after awhile. I feel that a person has to stay in a new area for at least 2 years before they are comfortable. Now, I wouldn't go back. I love this area and I still see my relatives often. Sometimes more than I did when we lived in the same area.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in School Nursing.

Try waking up at whatever time you would have to get up to be at work on time. Do this for at least a week, preferably more. It may change your perspective ;)

My commute is about 55 minutes each way, but I only work 8 hour days, except for a random late meeting here and there. I could not imagine that long of a commute working 12s.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Acute Care, CM, School Nursing.

I think you should look into relocating to halfway in between. That commute would be very rough after a 12 hour shift...

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion