In a nutshell, I am so fed up with nursing that I will do anything to avoid it. 10 minutes into my shift it was a madhouse. I didnt ever recieve any report yet and The call lights were going off like crazy. I went into a room 12 to check on the lady in the second bed since she had called for something. I could not even get to her because the lady in bed one (whom I have never met before) began to verbally and physically attack me. This is only some of what the crazy lady in bed one said (replace with curse word in your mind since i cant post them on here) :
"Knock on the door you fat jerk. Are you a nurse or an idiot. Your a fat piece of lard. I have rights. I pay your salary and I dont care if Obama was here you will do what I say. I will find where you live and have you TAKEN CARE OF".
The patient began to throw the meal utensils at me and anything she could grab. I backed out of there.
In 10 years of bedside experience, I have NEVER seen this much verbal abuse and aggression directed towards me - EVER!!
And in 10 years of bedside experience i have never lost my cool - except tonight. I SCREAMED back at this vile lunatic of a person as loud as possible to back, relax, and not give me any crap cause I will not tolerate it. I told hee I have feelings too and she will not abuse me. My stress and anxiety boiled over and I lost my cool by screaming at her (although I must say, she did deserve it).
The lunatic called the house supervisor and demanded everything under the sun. At this point i was outside my body watching myself react. My adrenaline was in full swing, I was shaking uncontrolably and i was on the verge of a hysterical breakdown. I gathered my backpack and I left. I told the team leader the entire situation and she said to go home and relax. She said that I was not fit to work in the condition i was in being a nervous wreck.
Before I left i told the house supervisor my side of the story and email my boss. I am now home.
Regardless of how "I could have handled the situation differently", I want to make it very clear that this patient was beyond out of line. Nobody - NOBODY deserves what i experienced tonight.
I am in a deep state of shock right now. I am severely depressed and i have awful anxiety. I am so streesed. I am on one hand happy that i stood up for myself and put this lunatic back in her place. On the other hand I feel like an ass.
Regardless, I realized that I cant do nursing anymore. All the deliberate short staffing, terrible hours, bad working conditions, and stupid people all served as the backdrop for my breakdown tonight.
I dont think I can even go back to work. I am thinking about going to my doctor tomorrow and asking for emergency FMLA time (work induced stress/depression). I think I am going crazy.
If anyone can offer any advise or words of encouragement - I need it now. I am home crying and just feeling terrible
I understand how you feel. I have taken time off during my 22yrs of nursing for this same reason. If you aren't able to financially do this, try home health or an office setting for a while. And don't feel alone. We have all felt mistreated, angry, overwhelmed and disrespected many times in our work. Try to remember that those are a lot of the same feelings our patients are having and do your best. Big hug!
You need to take as much time as you need right now for you, you need to get a counsellor to vent on that listens without judging and that is empathetic. More than anything else you have to realise you are human. You are allowed to make mistakes because you are human. Nurses are not machines that do not feel emotions, we are the most feeling of human beings. Once you have taken adequate time to heal your soul, then you can decide what you want to do, it may be you just need a change inside your profession, there are lots of choices besides bedside nursing if this is what you decide to do. This isn't an overnight thing, it is going to take time, and you need to be patient and take the time or this will crop up again when you least expect it. your workplace should have a EAP they are a god send. We are our worst enemies at times, and we beat up on ourselves more than anybody else would. Honey many many of us have been in similiar positions to where you are this very minute, you are stronger and more resourceful than you think. Tomorrow will be a better day than today, and the day after that will be even better. Trust yourself and allow the incident to strengthen you. Postive vibes being sent your way.
everyone does have their breaking point and it sounds like you were blind sided and only reacted as a normal human being would. i often have to bite my tongue and have also thought long and hard as to why i am in this profession when so many people are so disrepectful to us.. but then i have those patients that are grateful for the care and compassion that we provide that makes it a little easier. (unfortunately, there are very few in comparison to the mean despiteful ones)
keep your head up, do what you know you have to do and as others have said give it a couple days before you react.
Amen! My thoughts exactly! And I read a few posts above that we are now reaping the rewards of treating patients/residents like they're guests at the Hilton..Management does NOT help matters one bit when they waltz in ass-kissing these demanding, rude, unbalanced people. So NO, I refuse to feel sorry for these type.
I completely understand what you have experienced. It seems that the patient community feels that they have the right to treat nurses in a demeaning and disrespectful way and it's to be accepted. Granted some patients for whatever reason are not aware of this type of behavior and would cringe if they knew hoe they acted when in the right frame of mind. However I for one am tired of being verbally and physically abused by people who feel that they have the right to do so.i was labeled 'harsh ' by my own colleagues when I tried to make a patient take responsibility for their health and welfare and show up for clinic appointments on time. You need a huge hug and lots of support...take some time off from work and decompress and then decide where your nursing future will go.
Please reconsider leaving nursing. Not all fields of nursing bring abuse to the table. Where I work, behavior like this would not be tolerated. Consider an ambulatory care facility, a surgery center, a stand alone GI center, etc. No nights, weekends, or holidays, patients are basically stable and rarely rude. These types of environments are WORLDS away from what you have been enduring.
If that woman was AO, then I'd page for some meds. If I was physically attacked, guess what? That is psych/assault code. Don't wait, don't let them think they might hide what they've done. Restraint and a nice shot should do. This way as well it will be charted by more than one person...
Edit to add: never assume that the elderly have dementia. How ridiculous. Look. People who treat others poorly often have done so their entire lives. Do you actually think as soon as they turn 75, they are going to become sweet, cute, old people? More often they quickly see the teflon that white hair and wrinkles can give them and their absolutely horrible self gets free reign - what power.
Not to make light of this comment but reminds me of something that happened to me a month ago at work. "Demented" and confused elderly woman refers to me as a n****r and threatens to kick the s**t out of me. Once I told her that of she did I would press charges and that I'm also pregnant she SUDDENLY became oriented. Imagine that ...
and treat the resident's room like it is their home.
It was wrong of her to verbally and physically assault you, it was more wrong of you to react unprofessionally and sink to her level and yell back.
When a 2 year old yells at you do you scream back?
So the client is to be considered unique, individual, HUMAN, but the nurse is not? I believe the main point was that this was an out of character action for our fellow nurse and she seems to be trying to figure out the correct avenue to take now, finding these things called COPING skills, you know? You don't sound empathetic in the least, let alone SORRY. Save your post next time if all you want to do is reprimand. By chance- do you happen to be a manager? It would seem fitting, with your attitude. The behavior exhibited by this client sounds extreme- on a psych unit, that is very much expected- NOT when I'm trying to visit the other client in the room. If she needed privacy at that moment, she should have pulled her curtain-obviously she was ambulating just fine. Not only did that abuser assault the nurse, but she managed to compromise care of every other patient the nurse was assigned to. I fully agree a code of some sort should have been called on the patient and I'd be sorely tempted to press charges like others have suggested.
The patient needs intervention as well. People with poor coping skills tend to lash out with what ever theve got "my rights". Probably has a long history of abusing staff. Hope your admin has lots of experience with the "difficult client". I truly feel for you.
I have been kicked, slapped and knocked out,but I never had such trauma as you had. Calling security is never out of line, or if there is a rapid response team call them too. Taking in mind that you were assaulted and that you did not deserve it, you need to get EAP and/or an attorney. Your right to a safe workplace is vital. Please reconsider leaving Nursing entirely. That would mean the b** won and you are to valuable a person to let that happen.
davisdeanna
1 Post
I understand how you feel. I have taken time off during my 22yrs of nursing for this same reason. If you aren't able to financially do this, try home health or an office setting for a while. And don't feel alone. We have all felt mistreated, angry, overwhelmed and disrespected many times in our work. Try to remember that those are a lot of the same feelings our patients are having and do your best. Big hug!