Patients who love their sick role

RNperdiem, RN · Dec 9, 2013

Juice? Oh, the cafeteria is down the hall to the left, and they have plenty juices to choose from! Or, "Sir, I'm sorry, but I have no Tylenol to give you, but the gift shop in the lobby stocks them. The coat hook is behind the door.

I have learned over the years how to deflect the inappropriate requests while remaining sweet as pie.

Every time you refuse to be their maid (while never getting defensive), the more respect you will gain.

I suspect the inappropriate request is a test. Sometimes people need to see how much they can get away with.

In these customer service oriented times, I do feel your pain.

sammiesmom · Dec 9, 2013

Thanks. A patient yesterday also wanted her scds on but will not put it on herself when she is able to do it. I told her that since she is up ad lib, maybe she should put it on while she sleeps to promote mobility. She got upset and she said she has never heard that hospitals promote mobility and became a total ass to me all day.

Cammy17 · Dec 9, 2013

Juice? Oh, the cafeteria is down the hall to the left, and they have plenty juices to choose from! Or, "Sir, I'm sorry, but I have no Tylenol to give you, but the gift shop in the lobby stocks them. The coat hook is behind the door.
I have learned over the years how to deflect the inappropriate requests while remaining sweet as pie.
Every time you refuse to be their maid (while never getting defensive), the more respect you will gain.
I suspect the inappropriate request is a test. Sometimes people need to see how much they can get away with.
In these customer service oriented times, I do feel your pain.

Great tips! You are definitely a professional!!. Its so hard to keep calm when the patients family has more requests than the patient.

Morainey, BSN, RN · Dec 9, 2013

I had a family who complained about the hospital amenities while I was in the room. Such as, the food in the cafeteria was disgusting, they didn't like the way the linens were stocked, etc. Minor things. I just privately rolled my eyes and attended to the patient. 100% agree w/ above advice about deflecting requests while being sweet as pie!

sammiesmom · Dec 9, 2013

I need to practice responding to these requests without getting flustered, flabbergasted and having a *** face.

meanmaryjean, DNP, RN · Dec 9, 2013

I'm confused (not disagreeing with anything that's been said, just confused) - how is this 'enjoying the sick role'?

sammiesmom · Dec 9, 2013

Yeah good point I forgot to mention about the patient with the scds which I posted above. Don't you love patients who are up ad lib but asks for a bed bath and sits there like he is ready for his spa treatment? Geez

RNperdiem, RN · Dec 9, 2013

Again, the patient might not know what is expected of him, especially if being in hospital is a new experience. Teach him. Mr. X, here is some washcloths and a pan of warm water. You are allowed to be up and around now. I will leave everything you need on your bedside table and pull the curtain for privacy. Your nurse call button is in reach if you need me.

Sugarcoma, RN · Dec 9, 2013

When I read the title of this thread a very particular type of patient came to mind. I just spent a weekend with one of these. I call them Grande Dames, or the Matriarchal Martyr, as they are almost always female, not always though. They are usually convinced they will die at any moment. They make lots of comments about how they have it harder than any other person ever has and instantly hate anyone who dares to suggest that perhaps they should look at things another way. They are usually surrounded by all their adult children or boyfriends or husbands or parents or a mixture of all of these, who spend their visits weeping and patting the patient's head. Every little twitch or cough is great cause for concern and will send someone running from the room, arms flailing, with urgent cries of "Nnnuuuurrrsssseeee!"

The suitcase full of pajamas, robes, laptop, and stuffed animals is usually the first clue. Followed by the families request for pillows and blankets because they will be staying of course. They then set up for their watch. I have even seen some families post schedules of who will be coming when lol. They spend their time searching web MD and requesting juice, cookies, supplies, etc. etc. and pestering you with ridiculous questions. It is almost like it is a competition between the family of who can be the most annoying, like somehow that proves they love the patient the most. Meanwhile the patient lies back and absolutely basks in the attention of both family and staff. They are usually mortified and begin experiencing "new symptoms" whenever the word discharge is mentioned.

In some ways I envy these patients. They have a pretty impressive hold on their family members. I am pretty certain the only way my kids would notice I was very ill is if I was unable to cook, wash clothes, or reach into my wallet. I picture them driving up to ER and rolling me out in front of the entrance gangster style lol.

SwansonRN · Dec 9, 2013

There are definitely the patients that love the pampering and attention of being sick. Feigned helplessness does annoy me, but what really gets me is when the family calls for the nurse or comes out into the hallway to find me so I can hold the cup up to the patients face to drink or pull up their blankets to their chin. Oh brother. "you know it would be really great to get those muscles moving again. Next time I want you to practice grabbing the cup on your own. You have a great family here to help you out *hint hint* if you need it"

ausrnurse · Dec 9, 2013

Ah yes, the patient that comes via ambulance with three suitcases already packed. Totally mortified if you suggest that since both hands are working just fine, they are more than able to feed themselves. And since their feet are working just fine, I won't be giving you a bed bath or putting you on a pan - you can walk to the bathroom. How do you deal with these people?