Patient request you not take care of them?

pagandeva2000, LPN · Sep 11, 2008

Sorry this happened. To be honest, I can move on from it easily, because those are usually very difficult patients or familes that I don't want to be bothered with, either. Is there an incident that happened that they interpeted wrong? And most importantly, what are your supervisors saying? It happens to all of us, even when we do our best. I just professionally move on, and make sure that the charge nurse is aware, and other arrangements are made to continue care.

TakeTwoAspirin, MSN, RN, APRN · Sep 11, 2008

I don't understand. Did they not want care at all (end of life issues), or not want care from you specifically?

If they didn't want care from you specifically, don't be discouraged. If you have a long enough career it will probably happen again at some point. People come with all kinds of pre-conceived notions, past histories and prejudices that you will never begin to fathom. You can't stress yourself about such things. You won't change them or how they feel. I know it's hard not to take such things to heart, but truly, you learn that you can't control how people feel about you and that sometimes you just have to move on with your head up and your heart in the right place.

Let this go!

Halinja, BSN, RN · Sep 11, 2008

Yes, it's happened to me. Didn't really bother me. Not everyone gets along with everyone, and the patient is upset enough, they might as well feel comfortable with their nurse. It happens to everyone that I know. Not often, but everyone on the L&D floor I worked could remember it happening to them at least once. You shrug and go on. PACU is a little different...they come out sedated and don't really get that choice.

It shouldn't break your spirit. It shouldn't even really bother you. It would bother me if my coworkers asked me to leave, but a patient? Nope.

Cambria1023 · Sep 11, 2008

I work in a NICU and I think it came down to the fact that I am a new nurse. The way it was explained to me was that this mother decided I had answered "I don't know" one too many times to her questions. To be fair to myself, even if I don't know the answer to a question, I try my hardest to go find the answer for the parent. I know I have a great deal of learning to do, but I feel good about the care I provided to this family. My director of nursing came by a couple of days later (I'm sure she was told how upset I was) and told me I was doing a good job. I have just been having a hard time rebounding from this experience. I started working with no prior experience, already feeling wary about my lack of knowledge, and this situation has made me feel even worse. I work in a small unit and I feel like everyone is looking at me thinking "I wonder what SHE did to have that mom not want her to take care of her babies". I just want to be a great nurse and don't want to lose that drive by a lack of self-confidence in myself.

ohmeowzer RN, RN · Sep 11, 2008

this has happened to me and i am very happy to not take care of them ,,, they are usually difficult and hard to please...

don't take it personally , i think of it as a blessing in disguise

Batman24 · Sep 11, 2008

Awww...don't take it personally. You are dealing with a new mother who is under enormouse stress. She'd prob bite the head off a puppy right now she's so stressed out.

Some people do fear young and/or new nurses. Not a biggie. And I bet the other nurses are thinking they know how you feel. Others are prob thinking you got off easy. lol

CHATSDALE · Sep 11, 2008

this does happen to almost everyone sooner or later

learn from it and don't let it get to you, parents are very amprehensive and they aren't good judges of who is or is not competent

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Sep 11, 2008

In my area, there are quite a few racial refusals (patients refusing nursing care from nurses who do not belong to their racial-ethnic origin).

correctlywrong · Sep 11, 2008

Maybe you look like someone they didn't get along with once. Maybe they don't like your accent. Maybe they were offended because you ended a sentance with a preposition. Or there was some genuine miscommunication that troubled them.

It hasn't happened to me personally, but I have had to take on patients who have requested not to have one of my co-workers back. Sometimes it has been those people with whom I am proudest to work. Always, it has been due to a simple clash of personalities or something else that was really not the fault of the nurse in question.

The only really bad reaction I have ever seen from the nurse was to confront the patient about her reasons. That put the patient in a really uncomfortable position. She had felt uncomfortable with a male nurse who reminded her of a former abuser, and his confrontation of her only increased her distrust and general anxiety. If you absolutely need to know the reason, ask the nurse taking the assignment if s/he would mind to ask the patient if there is any feedback they can offer about what you could do better in the future. You may find that it isn't about you at all.

pagandeva2000, LPN · Sep 11, 2008

this has happened to me and i am very happy to not take care of them ,,, they are usually difficult and hard to please...
don't take it personally , i think of it as a blessing in disguise

Goodness, yes...many of them have had outrageous requests. When I was a home health aide, I had a patient who told me to go home after I went and did her laundry for her and told me that I brought back too much change, which, in her eyes, meant that I didn't let her clothes dry good enough.

Awww...don't take it personally. You are dealing with a new mother who is under enormouse stress. She'd prob bite the head off a puppy right now she's so stressed out.
Some people do fear young and/or new nurses. Not a biggie. And I bet the other nurses are thinking they know how you feel. Others are prob thinking you got off easy. lol

I have had two patients refuse my care because I am an LPN...they felt that only RNs were capable of providing better service. In one case, it was really funny, because she needed blood to be drawn and none of the RNs were experienced in that area. The other one felt I could not read a PPD. When she saw how long she had to wait, she then requested me, and because I was busier by then processing an emergency admission, she had to wait close to an hour and a half. RN was too busy trying trouble shoot the rest of the daily hassles of our clinic.

sissiesmama, ASN, RN · Sep 11, 2008

Has anyone ever had a family/patient request that you not take care of them? How did you react to this without letting it break your spirit?

Oh, yeah - I thought I was the ONLY one this has happened to! After I finished RN school, I was working as charge on a busy med surg unit. We were in report and i noticed that one name was familiar to me.

I go in to do my shift assignment. I recognize the face too by now, and I was trying to play it cool. After a few hours, she called out for me and I went down. She said, "You look so familiar, but I just can't place where." She asked me where did you go to nursing school? Did you go to -----? I teach there." So, I break it to her, no getting out of it, but I had to insert a little bit I should have kept to myself....

I said, in a polite voice, "No, I didn't. I went to ______ school. I interviewed at that school, but SOMEONE told me I didn't have what I had what it took to be a nurse." At that moment, she connected ----- sitting in her office doing my interview. About that time, here came her MD, who I have worked closely with for about 6 years. She asked me to step out and talk to her MD. I did, and shortly after that, he came to the desk and said, "Well Anne, pt --- would like to be reassigned to another nurse. She told me what happened at college----- and she is scared you will try to kill her!" I thought, what ?!! Pillow therapy??!! PLEASE!!!! She didn't know it, but that worked out fine for me, because I didn't want to be in there ALL ALL!!!!!!

Anne