Oldest in cohort...feeling out of place

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I know there are a lot of threads on allnurses regarding age and "it's never too late" etc. I think that is why I assumed it would be no big deal going back to school at age 40, into an ABSN program where everyone is at least old enough to have one degree.

Today was orientation and out of the 32 in our cohort, I was the oldest. I got excited because there was a lady close to my age, but one of the students just brought her mom with her! lol. I just felt out of place and was really doubting myself. I can't imagine having much in common with most of these students, let alone fitting into a study group or a group project with them. I was just bummed by the orientation and wish I could be more excited about my decision.

For me - I'm 50, and one of 2 males in the cohort. While there are a few of the ladies that are close to me in age, most are in their early to mid 20's. To be honest, I've been something of a loner all of my adult life anyway, so I tend not to dwell on being "a little different". At a week an a half into the VN program, I've never felt particularly ostracized - in fact, while completing prereqs I was quite touched at some of the lengths my classmates would go to when trying to include me in discussions.

Closest thing to an issue was defining the word "twerk" - since I'm bereft of teenagers here in la casita, I had to go look it up! :D

Really, for me it's boiled down to this - I'm there to learn the science and the art of the nursing profession; if my classmates were in diapers when I received my Bachelors in Computer Science, so be it.

----- Dave

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Specializes in ER.

melc0305, don't even think twice about your decision. You are in a great position to be more focused and less bothered by the little stuff. You will do great. I was 28 when I started my program and there were 1/2 older, 1/2 younger, out of a class of only 13.

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Specializes in ER.
Age doesn't matter. I'm usually the only youngin' among my groups and every one else is in their 30's or 40's and we get along great. :)

I used to feel that way and thought I'd never be the "older" one, now suddenly I'm 40 and people put you in a category of "older." Whaaaa?? I'm more active than the 20 somethings I work with, mind you with much less drama. It's nice to filter the fluff. Just sayin'.

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Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.

Why anticipate trouble? When I was in nursing school, my closest friend wound up being a classmate who was almost 25y older than me. A bunch of us formed our own study group, and it was the most divergent group of people you would ever want to see. Give it some time; you'll find some people to work with. Besides, being the oldest in your class is the least of your worries!

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Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.
I'm having the same problems. One of two older males. Not sure what to do. Thinking of dropping actually.

If you're thinking of dropping out because of being one of two older male students in your class, maybe nursing isn't for you.

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I'm fifty and in my second semester of AA RN. I'm actually not the only one in my age group, and that really helps a lot!

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If you're thinking of dropping out because of being one of two older male students in your class, maybe nursing isn't for you.

I am probably going to work in LTC and I will do just fine. I just need to get over the social anxiety when I don't have a partner for group activities since I don't fit into the clicks. I don't think there is anything particularly unusual about me, but I am just not into the same things or motivations as my classmates. Single dad here just trying to make my life a little better. Wish my classmates could help me out?

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I was a few months away from the oldest cohort in my LPN program(I started a month before turning 38). I was a few years from the oldest cohort in my RN program. But I was the oldest female in the RN program (I was 43 starting and 44 graduating).

My age didn't affect how my cohorts treated me. Some liked me, some befriended me, some didn't. But i don't feel it was ever due to my age. It was more like, our personalities, values etc just didn't mesh.

To be honest, I shyed away from the older cohorts because I really didn't care for their attitudes or the way they carried themselves.

Its nice to have friends during the program to lean on, call when you needed info etc, but I didn't go back to school for a popularity contest or to make friends. of course making friends was nice but I would have been ok w/not doing that. Actually during my LPN program i was a loner. i really didn't care for the vast majority of my cohorts. The few that I did talk with we were friendly but not what I'd call friends. And i was fine with that. Of a class of 65, i only continue to keep in contact with 3. My RN program was different, i became very friendly, and friends with many of them and still talk/chat with them almost on a daily basis thanks to Facebook and text messages/emails. Many of those I talk to on a daily basis.......the same age as my daugher :)

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Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.
I am probably going to work in LTC and I will do just fine. I just need to get over the social anxiety when I don't have a partner for group activities since I don't fit into the clicks. I don't think there is anything particularly unusual about me, but I am just not into the same things or motivations as my classmates. Single dad here just trying to make my life a little better. Wish my classmates could help me out?

Sometimes you have to exert more than the usual effort to break the ice. Can you invite several of your classmates over for snacks and studying?

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I was always so anxious to get into the Nursing program because I felt like by the time I get in, I will be too old. I will be 35 next month and after reading all these posts I feel a lot more motivated and careless about my age. It's true that age is just a number. I'm barely starting my prerequisites so I might be 40 by the time I get in since I will possibly be on a waiting list for awhile, and not going full time as I have 6 kids to take care of. But that's ok, I will be even more ready to start the journey. Now I am not so worried about my age when I become a Nurse. As long as my dream is fulfilled and I get to help people in their time of need that's all that matters and I will be happy with that!

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I have a lady in my cohort that is in her 50s she is my favorite, she always brings everyone cookies.

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Specializes in Oncology/hematology.

Hey, someone always has to be the oldest, right? ;)

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