Age when you had your first child?

SpiceChick01 · Jul 31, 2006

Got Bachelor's and got married same week in 2001. Already had stepkids ages 1 and 2. A mere year after marriage, the babies started arriving this way:

#1- 22 y. old

#2 AND #3 (twins) -23 y. old

Exactly 12 months apart. It's wonderful having them so close. I am now 27, and Tubal Ligation became my friend as my husband stood beside the hospital bed with a boy in one arm and a girl in the other....:rotfl:

I think mid twenties is a good time to start a family, provided your education is out the way and you are in a stable (commited) relationship or even better, married:) . It wouldn't have hurt me to wait until 25, but I wouldn't change it. My older two have been in school for a couple of years, and now all three of the little ones are in preschool! We are excited for all five to be of school age..... My oldest two will be off to college when I am 38-39, and the other three will follow when I am 41-42. Being young parents has it's perks!

MaryElizabethMahoney · Jul 31, 2006

I gave birth to my first son at 18yrs old, My second son at 19yrs & My last son at 21yrs....I got married at 18yrs old....I had major support....I don't have any regrets....Most of my friends are changing diapers, while I'm teaching my boys how to do laundry!! It works perfect for me being a returning adult nursing student.!!

paccookie · Aug 1, 2006

Morning everyone! I'm doing a paper for development psych (ugh) and was wondering how old most of you were when you had your first child and what you think the best age to start a family is. I appreciate your responses in advance!

Well, my daughter was born when I was 20 and my son was born when I was 23. If I had to go back and do it over again, I'd wait a while longer. I'm not saying that I regret having children at that point in my life, but I DO regret not finishing college before children and experiencing more of life before marriage and children. I got married at 19 and honestly, that's way too young! I'm now 26 (husband is same age) and we are dealing with the fact that we are very different people now than we were when we got married. I personally think that I have changed significantly more than he has and that has created some problems. I don't know if this marriage will last a lifetime or even a few more years. That makes me worry about my children as I grew up in a blended family that wasn't always pretty. ;-)

My mother had me at age 18 (I'm the oldest of five) and my grandmother had her first child at age 16 or 18 (she has four - the uncles and aunt I'm referring to below are her children). Having children early seems to run in my family. One of my cousins had his first baby at age 16 and his sister had her first baby at age 15. My uncles had their first child at ages 16 and 18 or 19. My aunt is the only one of the four who waited until after college to have children. I think she was 27 when her first child was born and 33 when her second child was born. She has a great philosophy about children and marriage: wait until you've been married for five years before having children. I think that's really good advice, no matter the age of the people involved. If I had followed her advice, I seriously doubt I'd be married right now.

Anyway, If I had to do it all over again, I'd wait until after college (probably around the age I am now since I'm working towards a master's degree) to even think about having children. If I was married already, I would wait until I had worked a few years and was sure that my marriage was solid. It's hard to put a specific number on all of that though.

Christina

twinmomoftwins · Aug 1, 2006

#1 at 34

#2 & #3 at almost, but not quite 37

life just happens, you know. can't agonize too much about planning the

perfect time, you just make it work, regardless of your age.

Jaynie · Aug 1, 2006

#1 son @23

I feel I was too ypung and miss out on things I wanted to do like travel. Don't get me wrong, my son is the light of my life I would never ever change him for anything. My significant Other and I want to wait until after we get married for #2 and we are financially comfortable which will make me probably in my 30's. however as we know from #1 you can't always plan 'em

Gompers, BSN, RN · Aug 1, 2006

I was 38 when I met him, 41 when the adoption was final.

:yelclap: He was one of "your" babies in the NICU, wasn't he?

I'm a big fan of adoption, personally. My older brother was adopted before I was born and I always have it in the back of my mind should I want more children but am unable to have them myself. I just wish it weren't so expensive!

Jo Dirt · Aug 1, 2006

#1 age 22

#2 age 24

#3 age 26

jolie22 · Aug 1, 2006

25.

KellNY, RN · Aug 1, 2006

My older brother was adopted before I was born and I always have it in the back of my mind should I want more children but am unable to have them myself. I just wish it weren't so expensive!

FTR--If you're willing to adopt a special need, older, or non white child, you could qualify for state subsidies, reimbursement, even total coverage.

chelli73 · Aug 1, 2006

I Have seen 35-40 year olds who were not "ready" for parenting---they were sadly mistaken they could control everything and rather clueless as to the major changes a child brings into everyone's lives when they go home....or so-self absorbed and self-centered, I felt the adjustment to parenting would be just enormous for them. I have seen others who were so set in their childless ways, that again, they were in for a huge surprise when baby went home with them....
....yet, I have seen others, who wanted to parent so desperately and were so ready, that these kids were blessed their parents waited until they were ready, emotionally, physically and financially. For some that time was not til they were 30-40 years old.
Conversely, I have seen 16 year olds who AMAZE me in their maturity and natural ability to parent. I have seen them rise to the occasion in a way that truly surprised and astounded me. And it helped most when they had excellent support systems in place to go home to.....
I have come to the conclusion, after being a parent myself, and being an OB nurse for 8 years, that age is not the deciding factor; emotional and financial maturity, as well as social structure at home, are.
It really does make all the difference if a woman having a baby has a very sound, reliable support system at home, be that a good marriage or family and friends willing to help out and be there for her when she needs respite or help. I find the social structure factor VERY telling as to how well parenting will likely go for a given woman/couple.
Age is more important physically than emotionally, I am learning.

#1-daughter at age 15

#2-son at age 17

#3-son at age 19

I LOVE MY CHILDREN SO VERY MUCH!!!! when i was pregnant with my girl, i read every expert book on childcare--(i.e. spock) and i have always been told that i was a better mom at 15 then some women were at 35! i am a true nurturer (unfortunately we lost their dad, but he loved them all as well). while i dont recommend this path for ANYONE, i love my 18,16,and 14 yr olds now just as much as i did then. we are very close...they are the reason i go on. yes there are tough times as with any family, but i feel that i am the glue for them. (beneath GOD of course) they depend on/trust me as i do them.

kadee7 · Aug 1, 2006

Morning all, I had my first child at the age of 21, I now have three beautiful children ages 14,15,and 16. You do the math!! lol It has been tough raising them so close in age but it is better for them I think because they seem to be closer connected when they are close in age, so they enjoy to be around eachother. I have seen mother's with children 3- more years apart and the children seem to hate each other to almost the point of pulling each other's throats out. Your remarks anyone. :chair:

Ssuraceu · Aug 1, 2006

#1 - 20

#2 - 24

#3 - 27

#4 - 36

#5 - 38

They all got the best of me and the worst of me. I probably had more energy with the older ones and more patience with the younger ones. My biggest challenge is meeting all their various needs. I've nursed both younger children at many baseball games and cheerleading tournaments. They get dragged around wherever the older ones need to go. The "babies" are adored by the older children.