Nursing student/Single mom

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Hi everyone.

I'm a single mom who is starting a 4 year RN program in 16 days, and am looking for any advice at all pertaining to balancing school and family, study aids, and general survival of nursing school.

I have sole custody 100% of the time of my 3 year old son, and moved out of province for school, so im am totally alone. Luckily I did meet one student mom here who *fingers crossed* might want to trade baby sitting breaks once in a while, but other than that its all on me and daycare.

I'd love to hear from people who have been here, done this or are doing this, but a big question i have is, if you could have predicted something you were going to be learning about, and started studying it...say 2 weeks before school started, what would that be?

Thanks!

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Specializes in PICU, Sedation/Radiology, PACU.

I think you might run into a problem when it comes to your clinical schedule. Nursing school clinicals are often scheduled during off times. They may be on the weekends, when daycares are closed. They may begin early in the morning or end late at night when the daycare does not have business hours. If your son is in a traditional daycare program, this could be a problem for you. It might be necessary for you to hire a nanny or in home baby sitter during those times.

As far as what to study now, there's really no advice I can offer. You'll learn a ton of information in nursing school, and there's not one specific thing that will be really helpful if you start studying now. Since you're in a four year program, your first year will be very little nursing and primarily general education requirements. Take one thing at a time. Good luck!

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This is almost exactly my experience, and I'm starting my second year tomorrow (yay!). The best advice I can give you is (1) be organized and (2) be realistic. I had to take a good hard look at my schedule and use time that was actually available. I found that studying or working up patients was nearly impossible (or took twice as long) while my son was awake. I'm a multitasker to the bone, so I made it a point to take care of "the incidentals" while my son was awake so that once bedtime rolled around I wouldn't have laundry, dishes, grocery shopping and other errands hovering over my head. In this way, everything got done and by the time I laid down for the night I was maxed out enough to fall right to sleep. It was hard because literally every minute seemed accounted for, but it worked out in the end. Time management is your friend!!! Try to build a good network. Having friendly, flexible people willing to help with your son really makes a difference. I had a bit of help last year (where do I put a 3-year-old when I have 5 a.m. clinicals?!?!) and I've spent a lot of my summer recruiting, so the team should be strong this year. LOL. Be creative and give all aspects (family and career) your best shot. I used to sit my son down next to me with a coloring book and crayons and tell him he was "doing homework" just like Mommy.

With regard to what you will be learning, every program is different so I can't help you there. What I can say is be prepared to learn. That will happen swiftly from day one.

Hope this helps!

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Good luck! I'm a single mom in an RN program, as well, and it is definitely hard to do on your own. But definitely not impossible. I bring my books to the park and read while my son is on the playground. I read while he's watching a movie. I show him the videos of the microbes for microbiology. We just get it in :)

Balancing my schedule was the most important thing. Took a few weeks to get all the kinks worked out. Find a good study buddy or two, not too many, though. And find either family, friends, babysitters, a 24-hr daycare if your area has one.

There's so much to learn in the beginning. What classes will you be taking?

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Thanks ladies,

Thats all great tips/advice.

Do you know how long in advance you get your schedule for your clinicals?

I'm sure if i have enough notice, i can find a way to get my son to his grandparents house (3hours away).

Or I can hire a babysitter sometimes. I'm not sure how many/how often clinicals are.

I dont yet have my class list, and its driving me nuts.

Closests thing i have is a "typical" outline. But varies by school location.

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Thanks ladies,

Thats all great tips/advice.

Do you know how long in advance you get your schedule for your clinicals?

I'm sure if i have enough notice, i can find a way to get my son to his grandparents house (3hours away).

Or I can hire a babysitter sometimes. I'm not sure how many/how often clinicals are.

I dont yet have my class list, and its driving me nuts.

Closests thing i have is a "typical" outline. But varies by school location.

We received our clinical rotation about a month before class starting.

The first semester we had very limited clinical experience. Second semester is twice a week all semester long.

Yes, you'll need to hire a babysitter. There are going to be times when you need one to study. I have children but they are older (16 and 10) and they are STILL a distraction. I had to make a sign that said, "Angry bear is studying. Poke with stick at your own risk," and put it up when I am really into reading.

If not I get, "Mom, I know you're studying but..." or "Mom something happened on Halo and blah blah."

It's not impossible to have children and go to school but it requires a good deal of planning. You will feel torn between being a mom and being a nursing student. Schedule everything, down to when you'll do laundry, when you'll go to the grocery store, etc.

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I haven't started clinicals yet, we do in dec. But I've gotten lots of info from nursing students a few terms ahead of me. Ask them everything! They are generally really nice and willing to give you the ins and outs about everything, the scoop on your instructors, the tips and tricks to each class, some share books, notes, etc.

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If you are just starting out i would suggest to get your schedule in check but that would go for anyone...being a single mom is hard but it is apart of your life that is not going to change...on the other hand, the book, fundamental succes helped me tremendously in my first nursing course...good luck!!!

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I am also a 100% custody single mom of a 3 year old, in a masters-entry nursing program (i.e. SUPER accelerated!). Guess what? You have a leg up on everyone else. You already know what sleep deprivation is and you already know how to multi-task. My best advice is to study every night, stay on top of (or ahead of) your work. Find the fastest way to learn information (bullet points in the back of a textbook, youtube videos) or to reinforce information. Force yourself to really sit and think through the information, because regurgitation of material does not work for developing critical thinking skills. Pay 100% attention in lectures and really utilize them as study time. When you get home devote yourself 100% to your child--it actually gives you a break! If your child is going to spend even 30 min. or an hour watching TV, always sit down and use that time to make notecards or cheat sheets for class. When studying, set a timer to study efficiently. Do not study for more than 2 hours at a time (just my opinion). Really break it up. Exercise every day (find a way to make time for it...it has kept me sane!). Try to eat well. The best thing to do with your time before nursing school is DEVELOP a support system (friends, family, COUNSELOR)...get counseling before problems arise, don't wait...utilize school counseling services. You can definitely do this. I hear people in my program whining about it being so hard...and they are single and child-less LOL...omg...don't get me started. I'm doing great in school, I love it. No doubt about it that 100% single parenting is HARD but I love my son and make sure we do really relaxing things together on the weekend.

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I have to laugh at the sleep deprivation comment. That is so true. Atleast im not used to EVER sleeping in. lol. Not studying more than 2 hours is really smart. I tend to push it, then forget what i've read because i got too tired.

Luckily where i live there are alot of family oriented outdoor activities, so I can spend my quality kiddo time with him...and my dog, outdoors. lol Did i mention I have one of those too. I have a feeling he is going to get fat over the next 4 years. I mean he gained 10lbs when my son was born. I only now just got it all off him.

How often do you other moms utilize a baby sitting service? and does your child(ren) got to daycare as well, or do you use just one child care provider?

Here I can get subsidy for a license daycare, but there arent any open after 6:00pm (my sons is only open until 5:20). So an occassional babysitter is my only option.

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Well. I am not a single mom, bit I do have 4 young children and husband who works a ton of hours, so he is not much help with the kids or at home. I just got accepted to my program, and start on Sept but had to do a year of gen ed classes, and it was no small feat. Try looking for an early preschool or daycare center with extended hours. I know its hard, also, as crazy as this sounds. I posted an add on craigslist and interviewed applicants at a neutral location. I paid for drug screens, required CPR certification and I national and state background check, along with prior work references, and character references. If they passed all if them, I reimbursed them for their out of pocket expenses, and had them meet my children. I chose the person who my kids liked the best. She ended up bring a college student who was taking mostly online classes, but she is still ready to start back to work for me in September, and she does a lot of great things with my boys. She is going to school for her teaching degree, so she gets good experience from this too. It is mutually beneficial. Balancing your time will be hard, but worth it in the end. Also, join a mommy and me playgroup, you can network with other moms, and make good friends who may be willing to help too. Also, checking with the department of human services or public assistance agency can provide you with great resources and may even be able to help with the cost of child care.

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I'm a single mom and I have a 3 year old I started my first semester of nursing school on Monday!! Best advice be flexible... Because things can and will change!! And stay positive I'm already learning that the hours our made for people with support systems.. Nothin is impossible but it's hard. I've used a website called care.com and sitter city.com.. After weeding out some people I've finally found a reliable and trust worthy young lady.. I also have other people lined up... So no one person gets burned out... I also have a spy camera in the house.. I just need to make sure my baby is being in a safe environment at all time.. He goes to a traditional day care but I have gotten really familiar with the daycare owner so she works with me.. I also have another option if all else fails for him to go live 8 hours away with my mom.. I don't want to do it.. Bt I may hVe to.. Because the load only increases from this point..

Just remember to have a solid support system and stay positive even when faced with obstacles!! It will all work out...

jasilady

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