Nursing School with no support from hubby and 4 kids...Can it be done?

Coloradogrl · Jul 31, 2009

Support is important but sometimes you just have to do it by yourself (((hugs)))

I am really sorry about your unsupportive husband if you dont me asking why is he this way?

If he is just a jerk then I say do it as quickly as you can so you can support yourself and your kids. There are tons of LPN programs in the DFW area and there is also RN ones. Oh course the LPN will be shorter and you will be able to get working faster but if you ahve the time I would go for the RN.

I get the feeling that you may need to get working because of your husbands attitude so a LPN might be the best bet

Good LUck!

FLDoula · Jul 31, 2009

I'm 48 and decided it was my turn now. Can it be done? Yes, but it will probably be difficult and nursing school is difficult anyway. My husband was not supportive of me at first but is now. My kids are older, only two living at home ages 15 and 19. I was a SAHM for many years while my husband was a military helicopter rescue pilot for 28 yrs and supported him (and his unit!) for all that time. He deployed every yr from 1991 to 2003 & was a Group Cmdr & had a lot of responsibilities. BUT he still supported us on the home front. He supported me when I was a major part of kicking SF Bay Area schools into gear for earthquake prep, he supported me in many other of my volunteer activities. My point is...as other posters have said...stick up for yourself. Mine wasn't supportive and there was a whole lot of issues going on. I moved to Orlando for 6 mos...started school there. We are now back together and I get 100% support! :heartbeat

I felt like you...my brain is mush...my confidence was low. I took training and certified as a birth doula and am also a certified lactation counselor. And although I love being a doula/CLC what I've wanted to do for years is go to nursing school. So I am...

angelina38 · Jul 31, 2009

I am a 36 year old stay at home mom of two kids and I have been a stay at home mom for the last 7 years. So I understand ur fears, but you can do this:yeah:. Your husband is probly scared, as crazy as it sounds they seem to think that we will leave them once were done or for a doctor. Like most husband of stay at home mom they get kinda of freaked out when their wives want to do something outside the home:eek:. They get insecure. My husband is starting to freak out even more now because I mite start school in November. It's hard. It took me 6 years to get all my prereq done. Balancing school and family is hard, but it can be done:monkeydance:. There is help out there for you. Look into and see if its doable, but don't just give up because of your husband. He will come around once he relizes that your doing it for the family and the money.. Good Luck

Let me know:),angelina

us3Rbent · Jul 31, 2009

If you really want to do it, JUST get started by taking pre-reqs to see how you do. You got to do it for yourself.

angelina38 · Aug 1, 2009

I just found out that i got accepted to national for the nov choert, if I can do it so can you. Y want it so go for it..

RoxyRN2B · Aug 1, 2009

hey i just want to say that it can definitely be done. remember success is a journey not a destination. the road will be bumpy, but well worth it. i am 31 and a sahm. i've always put my family first. i've always put my needs on the back burner, so i know how you feel. my dear husband has painfully brought this to my attention. i'm glad that he recognizes that i need and want to do me. i just hope he understands what he's in store for, lol. all i can say is stay focused and remember that all your hardwork during nursing school is only temporary. good luck and keep us posted.

~Mi Vida Loca~RN, ASN, RN · Aug 4, 2009

I have been thinking about going back to school for nursing for the last couple of years but have been scared to try. I really need to get a good job and nursing matches a lot of things that I am looking for. Back ground Info: My husband will not help with the kids, the house or daycare costs:madface:. He has a lot of issues which means I have a lot of issues. The 4 kids ages are 18, 7, and twins that are 4. The 18 year old is going to school this fall and working. So she can't be much help. I am in the DFW area. I have a Bachelors Degree in Psychology and Human Services. I have mostly been a stay at home mom for the last 8 years so not much work experience in anything in particular. Since I don't have much self confidence in myself or my situation and I don't see this changing until I do something should I go for my LVN and try this before my RN???

I know this will sound cliche but there is a saying, where there's a will there's a way. This is absolutely true.

I have 4 kids and little help from the husband. Although through the years he has gotten better when he has seen nothing is going to change on my end (dropping out). My kids are now 13,9,7 and 2. I started my Pre Reqs doing a full load about 4-5 years ago. I start actually nursing school in a few weeks.

There are tons of community resources that can help as well. If your religious join a church, a lot of churches help and so on.

If you have the determination you can make anything happen. I have come up against brick wall after brick wall in the past 4-5 years and it has been PURE determination that has kept me going.

lavendersapphire · Aug 4, 2009

Go ahead and do it! I can't speak from the SAHM/unsupportive husband role, but I can speak for the children. When I was 5 and my sister 5 months old, my mom stopped working to go to nursing school full time. From what she and my dad said it was tough not having her around all the time for those years and dealing with dad trying to cook and comb our hair (lol). But you know what - I dont remember any of it. I remember her graduation and how proud we were of her. And I also remember one Christmas where we had to wait to open our presents because she was coming off the 7p-7a shift at the hospital (but I was like 12 at the time)...and the occasional time where she was like "mommy has to study now". But really, we dont remember much about her time in school. So your kids will be fine, they'll barely remember the time where you were in school.

vivi25 · Aug 5, 2009

Im a mother of four as well. I have no family that lives in my state.. So no support and i manage. Its not easy at all but it is doable. I cook extra on the weekends and freeze it so that i spend less time cooking. My kids are in bed by 7:30pm, which gives me extra time to study or get some me time. I go to school while they are in school and daycare. Im currently on welfare so that i can get the help I need. My kids are 10,4,3,2. So if you organize yourself and be confident in what you want you can do it... Have faith

iwillbnrn1day · Aug 5, 2009

i will agree it wont be easy but it can be done

Anne36, LPN · Aug 5, 2009

Im in a similar situation. My oldest is going to college too and I have 3 younger kids at home. I also have to do every last thing in the house and with the kids. No family, and my husband is not home much. The thing that Im most worried about outside of time managemnt is just getting into ns. I get discouraged all the time, its near impossible to get in even with straight A. Im just going to keep doing the pre-req for now. It s too hard to worry about the big picture, just taking it 1 class at a time.

rph3664 · Aug 5, 2009

I don't mean to change the subject here, but I read a few posters who complain that their husbands are no help or support. Being a father myself, this annoys me to no end (I often say that is why I never dated or married a man )
But why have multiple kids with such deadbeats?!?!?!?!?! Don't you know you have to train them on the first kid (ok there is a hint of sarcasm on that one).

Revisiting this board reminded me of a man I work with who has a baby due in a few weeks, and he shows NO interest in it and has strongly implied that he does not intend to support it on any level, not even financially. :down: He's talking all the time about his new jet ski, and how delighted he was to learn that you can use the employee child care center even when you aren't working, "so when it's my turn to babysit, I'll just leave the kid there."

whiskey tango foxtrot bbq?

Why have a child if you don't want to take care of it? He reminds me of the guys I worked with in college who said they planned to go into their marriages with the intent of treating their wives badly after the kids arrived so they would be a divorced dad. :confused:

If he was just out of high school, I could kind of understand this kind of behavior, but he's 36 years old! He's a fairly new employee, and I am not the only person in our department who's starting to think he's a sociopath.