Stupid things said by your non-nurse significant other - page 19

This thread is started in honor of my darling husband, who told me this morning that he almost woke me early because he had a bowel obstruction. I said, "A bowel obstruction? Really? Tell me... Read More

  1. by   nola1202
    Quote from calinurse11
    Awe how sweet
    and this is the kind of thing that makes all the administrative crud, and short-staffing, broken, missing equipment/supplies worth it. Suddenly being a nurse is the most interesting, fun thing in the world again. (until something happens and I hate it again!)
  2. by   Grandmasgirl
    either that or a pound of M&Ms in one sitting!
  3. by   Grandmasgirl
    Quote from AZMOMO2
    Almost pneumonia...did you tell her in medical terms its called a cold?
    like being a little pregnant? Yikes!
  4. by   Jessy_RN
    My ex hubby. "Lorraine, is very pregnant!" ( his teenage sister). Really? As opposed to slightly pregnant?

    LOL
  5. by   MiniBabyRN
    My boyfriend is convinced that you can get crohn's disease from washing your hands too much "because it weakens your immune system since you never come in contact with germs." No amount of explaining can persuade him otherwise... Oh, and when I ask him where he possibly got this information, he says that his brother (who is an accountant) told him (I just graduated nursing school). Oh well...
  6. by   divaRN*
    My boyfriend INSISTS that acetaminophen is the same thing as aspirin. I have told him MANY time it is not aspirin and it is tylenol. He still insists i am wrong even when i get the bottles out to show him.
  7. by   mama_d
    "Every night this month cannot be the worst night ever." Wanna bet? They just kept getting exponentially worse.

    "The full moon thing is a bunch of superstitious nonsense." How 'bout you go work my shift next time then?

    After my hysto a few years ago, I developed an ileus. NP wanted to admit me straight to the hospital, but I had too much stuff to do the next day, so she let me go home with strict orders to be followed, including a BM deadline. Hubby told me "If they wanted you back in the hospital, I'm taking you there." I told him he'd have to knock me out first b/c there was no way I was letting them drop a NG in me. He then spent what added up to literally hours over the next two days outside the bathroom door asking "Did you poop yet?" I've never had someone so interested in my BMs in my life.
  8. by   sharpeimom
    our insurance company sent us test kits to screen for occult gi tract blood. my husband brought in the mail, opening his envelope as he came through the house. he skimmed the instructions rather than actually reading them.

    his question?!

    "sounds like a good idea, but how the $#&& do you get the poop squashed down flat enough to fit into that tiny little window and still be able to close the top?":grn:
  9. by   gobiprincess
    Do funnies by kids count here?
    My nephew yells, " Mom I'm growing an egg on my Penis!"
    Sis runs in to see what the heck he's talking about...
    nephew He points "Look eggs"
    Sis "Those are not eggs, those are your testicles."

    Be Love
    Nicole
  10. by   Fngrpntsnotasin
    My husband was filling out some paperwork and it asked him to describe his general health was and he answered "perfect". I thought it was cute!
  11. by   ashleyisawesome
    i was at clinical and having some bad flank pain, so one of the nurses told me to go to employee health to get checked out for a uti. I had elevated WBCs in my urine, but EH wanted me to go to the er fot a ct to make sure i didnt have kidney stones.. so im sitting there in the er bed, texting my boyfriend-- updating him. i told him they gave me an iv and gave me some good pain meds that were helping, but i was so hungry and they wouldnt let me eat until after the ct. he replied "babe, arent they feeding you through the iv? thats what they are for right?" lol....
  12. by   penny112
    I was out to dinner with a friend and she brought along a family member who is a bit of a hypochondriac. She told me that she thought she had neck cancer and made me feel the back of her neck because every time she moved her neck she could feel things moving. Wait, things move when you move? Shocking! I told her if nothing moved when she moved, she wouldn't be able to move. She's very relieved to hear she doesn't have neck cancer.
  13. by   grownuprosie
    I recently had a bad respiratory infection and my BF, J, decides to use Web MD to diagnose me. He comes into the bedroom and says, "So, you either have Bronchitis or an erotic aneurism." (actual word on web MD= aortic)

    I wonder how i caught that?!

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