Nurses struggling with mental illness

Nurses Disabilities

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I was just wondering if there are any other nurses who struggle with mental illness. It seems to be one disability that is met with little tolerance and support in the medical field. I do have major co-morbid mental illness, Major depression/PTSD/DID, and have had many problems in my career. I have been in therapy and on meds for a long time and have worked very hard to be functional, and I have suprised myself by what I have been able to achieve. Currently, I am a hospice nurse in a residential setting and it seems that I have found my niche. It doesn't aggravate my illness too much. I am very busy at times and most of my job revolves in much cognitive thinking and decision making about the best ways to respond to a patient's emerging or existing symptoms, and in assessing patients to see where they are in the dying process, plus lots of educating to patients and families. My extensive personal trauma background has made me able to have a different perspective on death and don't see it as the scary thing that is SO SAD, that a lot of people do. Plus, because of the things that I have been through, I am more able to be compassionate and understanding of patients and their fears. I especially do well with patients with existing mental illness or lots of anxiety. I notice that a lot of nurses have little tolerance for a patients anxiety and are not willing to take the extra time to walk them through things and provide the extra reassurance that they need.

Yes, there are some nursing jobs that I don't think I would be able to do because of the fast on the spot life and death action necessary. ER and Trauma/Burn are pretty much out for me. But thats OK. A lot of nurses couldn't handle doing what I do either for their own reasons. We are all suited to certain things.

Having mental illness doesn't automatically make you unsuited for the nursing profession. Even though I have heard many times, "what are you doing here?" "Shouldn't you be doing something else, less stressful?"

I am here and am doing the thing I am suited for. Yes sometimes I have to take time off due to my illness, but its no different than somone who has flare ups of a chronic physical illness like lupus, chronic fatigue, or fibromyalgia.

I would like to know how other nurses have coped with their own illness and their nursing careers.

Severina

Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
Well I guess we can both serve as a warning to other nurses then ...LOL! :chuckle

Yep; "What not to do" LOL

Hi,

It's nice to know that there are nurses out there that are struggling with some of the same things that I am. I have PTSD/Major Depression/GAD/ and Panic Disorder. I've been on meds for about 5 years and am currently doing well. I'm just orienting to my first nursing position and that has been a challenge especially in terms of symptoms. I am learning not to get overstimulated and finding a routine, but I find that it takes me a little longer than I feel my preceptor would like me to go.

To disclose or not to disclose, that is the question. Some of the people at work know about my illness because I knew them in school and felt comfortable disclosing that information to them. But the rest are not informed on the topic. I'm finding that in my rural area of the country, a lot of nurses really don't know or aren't trained to handle the particulars of mental illnesses in our clients and I am thinking of offering myself as a resourse to aid their learning. If I can't use my experience of mental illness to help anyone else, I know that there will be others that will experience the same things that I do. Who knows, there may be some undiagnosed people with mental illnesses on our staff and we need to build a culture of caring and understanding. I want to help do that. It's not all about me anymore.

Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
Hi,

It's nice to know that there are nurses out there that are struggling with some of the same things that I am. I have PTSD/Major Depression/GAD/ and Panic Disorder. I've been on meds for about 5 years and am currently doing well. I'm just orienting to my first nursing position and that has been a challenge especially in terms of symptoms. I am learning not to get overstimulated and finding a routine, but I find that it takes me a little longer than I feel my preceptor would like me to go.

To disclose or not to disclose, that is the question. Some of the people at work know about my illness because I knew them in school and felt comfortable disclosing that information to them. But the rest are not informed on the topic. I'm finding that in my rural area of the country, a lot of nurses really don't know or aren't trained to handle the particulars of mental illnesses in our clients and I am thinking of offering myself as a resourse to aid their learning. If I can't use my experience of mental illness to help anyone else, I know that there will be others that will experience the same things that I do. Who knows, there may be some undiagnosed people with mental illnesses on our staff and we need to build a culture of caring and understanding. I want to help do that. It's not all about me anymore.

Interesting; I was gonna do that at my last job. Do an inservice or two about self care, and mental illness, and also be a confidante if people wanted help privately. Never got to do it cuz my symptoms got exacerbated, and then I had to leave the job. So they learned by observing first- hand unfortunately. I had wanted to relate to them as a competent professional. Oh well.

Anyway I agree, it isn't just about me, just make sure it's FIRST about you. And take what time you need to get oriented. If nothing else you can disclose a learning disorder and that if they don't get out of your face your head will spin around!

Specializes in Hemodialysis, Home Health.
If nothing else you can disclose a learning disorder

... and that if they don't get out of your face your head will spin around!

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Love it ! :p

We are all kindred spirits on this thread, as we have all walked through the same turmoil. You are all amazing people here.

I have attention deficit hyperactivity disorder and suffer from severe anxiety, which I am currently being treated for. I just started working in an ER and the constant organization as well as constant reassurance that I am doing well has helped me with my ADHD and my anxiety. In talking with my doctor(psychiatrist) about lowering my dose of Adderall (at my request) I got nervous and asked him if I could request a higher dose if I find myself going scattered brain. After a discussion he pointed out that my main problem is the fear that I will not perform well due to my deficits and he assured me that he has plenty of patients who work in the healthcare field, I'm not the only one, and with the right medications many, many, many of them are doing an incredible job.

Do not be afraid to find the answers. Seek treatment and continue doing the job you love!

By the way, a bit of irony, a new student in the ER said she cannot wait until she has the self confidence and assertiveness that I have! :chuckle

I am amazed at how many people see us as stronger people than we sometimes feel. Hyperstudent, that new student in the ER is looking up to you because you have more experience and probably more confidence than he/she does.

We have become very practiced at hiding our doubts and fears that come with our mental illnesses because of the stigma attached. Some of us are afraid of reactions at work, or even among friends. If it can happen to someone they know, then it can happen to them......so the thinking goes. The most important thing is to believe that we can and are getting better while learning to manage our symptoms both on and off the job. We always feel differently than we present. At least I do. I know that I am the one that has the most doubts about myself.

I always have to remember to take things at my pace and not to let anyone push me. That is when mistakes are made. My pace is different than others. We each have our individual pace that balances us. When we find it, it is a good day. :coollook:

Anna

I have tourettes syn and sometimes my facial expressions don't match the things going on inside the brain...frequently people think i am laughing at them [or worse they think i am laughing to myself] but i have chosen not to share this with many people because even nurses are not familiar with this disorder and nurses are the can be the most judgemental people sometimes

I suffer from PTSD and have a history of eating disorder and self injury. My hospital experience is actually what got me interested in nursing. What I've gone through has made me more compassionate and empathetic, as well as more understanding of mental illness.

Nothing can stop us! We will follow our dreams, and we will SUCCEED!

Smiles,

Kristi

Specializes in Alzheimer's, Geriatrics, Chem. Dep..
I have tourettes syn and sometimes my facial expressions don't match the things going on inside the brain...frequently people think i am laughing at them [or worse they think i am laughing to myself] but i have chosen not to share this with many people because even nurses are not familiar with this disorder and nurses are the can be the most judgemental people sometimes

{{{{{{{{{{Chatsdale}}}}}}}}]

Hello Everyone,

I have been viewing the different threads at allnurses.com for the last 2 years. I've learned alot about the nursing field and some of the in/outs and gripes that accompany and field, not just nursing. Right now I'm in my last semester of pre-nursing classes, before clinicals. I have hoped and prayed for the last 2 years for someone (above) to give me a "sign" that I should pursue nursing for my career. The thought of being a nurse almost give me "chills", in a really good way. My mother, 2 grandmothers, and aunt are all RN's and I look up to them so much. My husband thinks I have a "calling" to be a nurse, as he would put it...and my family thinks its the best career fit for me. I am currently an administrative assistant (A.A. Business Admin) for a large company and am miserable.

Which brings me to the reason for my post. I also have severe anxiety, generalized anxiety disorder, and suffer from panic attacks, which are treated with Ativan PRN (yeah, my first nursing term!!!!)...I have taken SSRI's etc.. before...none seem to help enough to override the side effects (weight gain, lack of desire for intimacy) to keep me on them....but I wonder if I will be able to "keep" it together in the nursing field. I also have a hard time sleeping...I take 3 mg ativan to go to sleep....I worry about having to work 3rd shift and being really out of sync with reality. I would LOVE the 3-11 shift or any combo of 2nd shift..i just don't think i could do the overnight thing..i mean physically..without being so "out-of-it" i would probably end up in the hospital or worse....

So basically, I'd great to read this post and it's what has prompted me to finally register and post a reply myself. I know from reading your posts that some people take ssri's...which one's work and do you notice the side effects?..And do you think "condition" would interfere with my career as a nurse. Do you really have to be tough as nails?....Any information from anyone interested in helping me on the quest would be appreciated in the utmost. I think becoming a nurse will do wonders for my being..I want to find my niche' , too!!

Hi, Macy! I, too struggle w/several diagnoses--PTSD, Bipolar, Dysthymia, Panic Disorder. I have tried SSRI's, to no avail. Am now on Risperdal and Desyrel for the psychosis and depression. I also take an occasional Xanax for the Panic Attacks, and sometimes Ativan for sleeplessness. I feel like a pharmacy(LOL)!! They help, and I am able to work in an in-patient psychiatric facility, when they need me. It helps to work with patients who have some of the same difficulties as I do. Lets me see I'm not alone. And that I could collapse mentally any day, now. That keeps me on my toes! I work for a staffing agency, and when I feel squirrley, I don't go to work if I can help it. I have a tough time paying bills that way, but at least my sanity is preserved.

I have worked in many specialties, including Med-Surg, OB-Gyn, and Geriatrics since I was diagnosed, but this is by far the best situation for me.

I also work with a therapist on a regular basis, and take my meds. I can't always afford them, since I don't have health insurance, but I always am able to buy a few days worth to last until I work again.

I work the 11p-7a shift when I can work, and for me, most of the time, it works out for the best, because the work load is lighter. Not always easy to sleep during the day, because I have a 17 yr old daughter at home. She is developmentally delayed, ADHD, Bipolar, too, with Oppositional Defiant Disorder. A real hand-ful, but I try to cope. There are still days I just try to stuff my crap, and sometimes it works. Some days are better than others.

I hope this helps you. Take care!

After reading all of this I have a question, well first let me say I started having Panic Attacks in August of last year in my last semester of Nursing School. My Dr. put me on Lexapro and Xanax. I thought it would go away once I graduated, no way, from Jan-March I wouldn't leave my house at all. Had very paranoid thoughts and changed meds several times. I'm now on Wellbutrin and still Xanax prn for the p/a's but can leave my house now. I was sure this would go away after taking boards. No it didn't. I still have the p/a's and in April I was diag. with type 2 Diabetes. I've been through a lot this year and am taking time off before I try to go to work. I plan to start after my son returns to school in August. Now on to my question.....

If I'm taking Wellbutrin and Xanax and have a prescription for them both and I know they will show up in my drug test, do I need to disclose what I take them for at a job interview? I'm worried if I tell the person interviewing me that I was diag. with Panic Disorder she/he will think I'm not good under pressure, which I am and have been. This is what I'm not sure of. I don't mind my Nurse Supervisor knowing this if she/he must know but that would be after I get the job wherever I decide to apply. Does this make sense? Any suggestions would be great.

Also on the delayed sleep thing. I've always had insomnia and can stay up all night and sleep all day. I've tried everything to go to bed early, can't do it. While in nursing school I went to bed at 1am and got up at 5:30am and did that the entire time. I've also stayed awake all for over 24 hrs. before with no problem. I've tried everything OTC and Ambien, doesn't work. This started when I worked as an EMT, I worked 24 hr. shifts and we did get to sleep some nights, not a lot but I'm so used to getting woke up in the middle of the night that if I do get woke up I can't go back to sleep for a couple of hours. I thought this would go away but it's only gotten worse with the PD.

Thanks for listening and I'm so glad everyone here has shared this, it makes me feel better to know I'm not the only nurse going thorough these kinds of things.

Sandy

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