Geez, my powers of observation are really slipping. I just noticed this thread. I suffer from PTSD, and major depression. I've had them ever since childhood, after witnessing the horrible physical and emotional abuse my mom endured at the hands of my dad.(this happened in the 70's when resources for DV victims didn't exist) As a kid I buried my terrible memories, and tried to live life as a regular kid, only to have the repression come back and bite me in the butt in my 20's and early 30's. I am 35 now, and it's taken me this long to come to terms with what happened to my mom and me. In 2002 I finally had to come full circle when my mom was critically ill for months. When she finally came home from strengthening at the nursing home, and I had just gotten my LPN license after juggling school, and my sick mom being in and out of the hospital 5 different times before Labor Day 2002. She was home for ONE DAY, and the very next day, my dad yelled at my mom for no reason, and that just pushed all my buttons. I told him he shouldn't yell at her after all she'd been thru, and if he did it again he could get the **** out of the house. 3 hours later, he was lying in the yard, dead of a massive MI. I tried CPR, but was not successful of course. After all of this, I just fell into a downward spiral. Finally realized that if I were to live I had to get some kind of help. Went on Paxil 37.5, and it has helped me out. Did some backslididing and stopped taking it. Was okay at first, but fell really hard again. Thoughts got really dark, and I knew I had to start taking them again. My friends, My beloved mom, and my faith keep me going when things get tough. Whatever you do, NEVER GIVE UP ON YOURSELF. You're too valuable for that. Someone may need you and not even know it yet.