I'm Laine and I'm Alcoholic/Addict

  1. I grew up in a working class family. Our family was mosty close knit until the late elementary years. I had a younger brother born in 1990. Two summers later in 1992 he died by drowing in a pool while I was babysitting him. I would never be the same careless child again. I continued to be a good student but were afraid people around me were talking about how I killed my brother.
    During Junior High and Freshman year I hung around the popular kids but soon realize the B crowd was nicer and were having more fun.
    So at the age of 15 I started to drink. I got drunk that first night I drank. As the big book says "I had arrived." All my insecurities left me and it was love at first drunk. I continued to drink every weekend until I graduated high school as Salutatorian of my class.
    I went on to college after high school. It was about 200 miles away from my parents. I had no idea what I wanted a degree in so I focused on partying. Having grown up in the country I didn't know how to related to these middle classed kids who grew up in the suburbs. Drinking soon became my identity. I accumulated 2 MIPs my first year at that new school. The second half of my sophomore year was spent drinking daily and using ecstasy one or two times a week. It seemed like the perfect cure for my undiagnosed bipolar depression.

    After that semester I moved home to work because I had stopped earning college credits. One day I got drunk in the afternoon when I should be working so my mom sent me to treatment and the ripe age of 21. I soon moved to the treatment town and then went back to drinking and even snorting some drugs. At this point I had realized that I wanted to be a nurse and was taking one class toward a BSN. While in this town I went from being hypomanic to severely depressed in a very short time. I took an entire bottle of Flexeril and ended up coding from it in the ICU.

    So I moved home again. That April my father went through the ice on his snowmobile and passed away. I started to take prereq classes for nursing but many days I would drive the 60 miles to school to go sit at the bar that opened at 7. I would stay there all day and go home as if I'd gone to my classes. The next semester my mom sent me to Meninger hospital in Texas, from there they sent me to Florida. After 9 months I moved back to Michigan to begin prereqs for nursing school. My last drink was 2 glasses of wine with my best friend after I had completed 2 treatments and 6 months of halfway house living. After the wine ran out I immediately wanted to go to the bar. It rang true what I had heard in meetings about an alcoholic not being able to stop. I forced my car to drive home. That January 4, 2005 was my last drink. I moved away from my mom and into a friend's house downstate and started nursing prereqs. I was introduced to a young people's meeting and convinced myself they would become my new friends. I have now been married to one of the members of that group for over a year. I finished the entire nursing program in 3 years and I have 3 years sober. I essentially got sober because I wanted to be a nurse so much. I just got my first RN job offer again.
    Now that I know what my life can be like sober, I don't plan to ever drink again. I go to at least one meeting a week, talk to my sponsor, and continue to pray. I am entirely grateful that with a good psychiatrist and AA meetings that I have a wonderful life today.
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    About BrayaRN

    Joined: Oct '06; Posts: 78; Likes: 40
    Specialty: 2 year(s) of experience in Cardiac, NICU, ED


  3. by   ElvishDNP
    for two years of sobriety!!
  4. by   sissiesmama
    Hey Laine! I'm Anne and I am an addict. Glad you are here with us. Your story was very powerful, and I am so sorry to read about the loss of your father and brother.

    God bless you and your family, and know there are so many of us out here for you!

  5. by   VivaLasViejas
    Good for you, Laine!! And welcome!!!:wlcmggrp:
  6. by   4x4country
    congrats! We are all VERY proud of you. Keep up with the great life. Its def. worth it. prayers are with you.
  7. by   Tweety
    Thanks for sharing your story. Best of luck in your career! w00t!
  8. by   Thunderwolf


    :mchmrdnc: :dncg:

    Congrats on your continued sobriety.

    Many hugs.
    Last edit by Joe V on Feb 6, '08
  9. by   Thunderwolf
    I have 3 years sober

    Here is a medallion, just for you.

  10. by   CaseManager1947
    Thanks to the grace of a loving God, the fellowship of AA, and some work on my part, I haven't found it necessary to take a drink since September 17th 1985. AA saved my life and my soul, those wonderful people loved me until I could love myself. This is so great to have this on the forum sites. Great!!!! I am grateful for this 24.

    Morghan in Kansas
  11. by   rn/writer
    Congratulations on three years and 33 days sober. Here's hoping for three years and 34 days. You have much to be proud of.
  12. by   time4meRN
    Keep up the good work. Remember , one day at time.
  13. by   Serenitylove
    You are telling part of my story. I am 4 days clean and currently on a medical leave off absence from school. School starts back in Sept and I will be in my second semester of nursing. I have surrendered and go to a meeting everyday. I have struggled with addiction for years. GOD PLEASE Help me stay in this process. I have a sponsor who has been clean for 12 years. I am currently reading the first step. I want to be a good nurses and I am so tried of the way I had been living my life. Please keep in touch if you can.
    THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!heartbeat
  14. by   4x4country
    happy birthday ! good luck with everything. you can do it!!!!!