nurses "eating" young

[nursepotter05]

I have always heard that nurses are notorious for "eating" their young. I graduate in May. I have to say that I have witnessed this first hand, and have experienced it, as well. I have always wondered why this is and wanted everyone's opinion on why it happens. It seems to me that experienced nurses would want to nurture young nurses instead of offering them up to the wolves....so to speak.

[SmilingBluEyes]

Wasn't actually the part I was looking for suggestions about, but point taken. Sorry. Seemed a lot funnier last night.

it wasn't. Maybe you can edit it out? I did not find it amusing,either. Be careful you don't enter nursing saying things like this. It is still primarily female,and I am sure you would encounter some serious "young eating" if you did.

Your comment took you down a peg in my eyes, anyhow.

Great thoughts, especially the Cherry Ames comment. It's so true, nursing is not "nice" all the time and it's never easy. Perhaps what is considered "young eating" is perhaps an attempt to toughen up some people so they CAN take the punches that are sure to come their way, from all directions: patients/family, managers/administrators and of course, certain doctors. Consider that, too.

[meownsmile, BSN, RN]

Exactly, smileingblueyes:,, let a p.o'd doc get ahold of one of these youngsters and im sure they would prefer getting a bite from a RN any ole day, i know i would. Even if nurses tend to be a little sharp,, at least we arent quite as nasty about things as docs can be. Ive seen the most experienced nurses brought to tears by a nasty doctor attitude.

[sleepless in norman]

I am a strong believer in " See One, Do One, Teach One " it is true that nurses are Sharks, They Eat Their Young, but this is true in any profession, where highly skilled and educated people are involved, so remember it isn't just you, it's the nature of the beast, welcome to the grownup professional world of Dog Eat Dog. Oh, look at your state board of nursing and the lives these people destroy, senselessly, not just the nurses, but their famillies who depend on them financially, now you can wave your self rightous flag and say they are protecting society from bad nurses, but are they really, when you read the whole story of the BON actions against the unfortunate, case by case, it will sicken you, and when you learn that the BON has no responsiblity to explain their actions, the Nazies gave no crdible reason for taking famillies out of their homes in the dead of night and looting their belongings, never to be seen or heard from again. Good Luck.

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

sometimes it is young that have no idea how to behave in a hospital environment, how to work hard and that the world is not that delicate ivory tower that treats one with kid gloves.

we see it on this bb. someone vents on a situation in which they feel some entitlement, or that addresses professionalism, or manners, or that has been discussed ad nauseum. they spell poorly, use run on sentences, and are almost incomprehensible. then one of us mentions that it is unprofessional to use such poor spelling and grammar (if they are discussing "professionalism"), or that we disagree with their opinion, or tell them that the suggestion is unworkable in our experience, or that they are not "entitled" to aid or assistance, or that they behaved badly.

and we are accused of being unsympathetic or heartless or "eating our young". that anyone that would say such things must be a terrible nurse or a bad person. and then another will get sanctimonious about how they would never do such a thing.

disagreeing, gently correcting based on experience, and pointing out errors that are contrary to one's purported message...these are not "eating". unfortunately, some new grads do not know the difference between these ane truly "being eaten".

nursing is no longer "cherry ames". we can't stay impossibly neat and tidy, patients are no longer polite and it gets ugly in the trenches. you need to be tough to survive. and if your feelings get hurt by a harsh word or two, or you always expect fairness....well, life isn't fair.

.

i snipped some for brevity -- which i still have not achieved, but the intent was there!

[color=#4b0082]

[color=#4b0082]i have to heartily agree with your post. sometimes new grads cannot take correction in any form, no matter how gentle. or they don't "hear" gentle correction and need, essentially, to be bludgeoned over the head with a concept such as "it is not acceptable to leave the icu without someone watching your patients" before they get the message. (and then whoever finally got through to them is in the wrong, for "making them feel bad." )

[color=#4b0082]

[color=#4b0082]and you're absolutely correct about what happens on this board as well. a fun, humorous thread can be hijacked by someone claiming that "er nurses are heartless because they make fun of drug seeking behavior instead of treating every patient with compassion." others jump in and agree that they would never dream of treating patients in that way and on and on and on . . . . usually people who have never worked as nurses at all, much less in a busy, inner city er.

[color=#4b0082]

[color=#4b0082]presumably new grads will survive and get some experience and learn. until they do, however, they're going to make errors. sometimes really stupid errors. and sometimes the experienced nurse who is working with them or next to them will be too busy to take the time to talk circuitously around the problem but instead flat out say "that's wrong." and the new grad may get their feelings hurt. developing a thicker skin may be a survival technique.

[color=#4b0082]

[color=#4b0082]i know a lot of experienced nurses who are burnt out on precepting by the necessity to avoid hurting someone's feelings when it seems that all new grads are overly sensitive. to those new grads: get over it! it ain't all about you. it's about patient care! learn to take criticism constructively. and appriciate how much time and effort it takes to try to teach you something when you're convinced that you already know it.

[color=#4b0082]

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

Carolina, excellent post. Your insight, as always, is appreciated.

[Spidey's mom, ADN, BSN, RN]

Carolina, excellent post. Your insight, as always, is appreciated.

Ditto. Excellent.

steph

[nursemike, ASN, RN]

Exactly, smileingblueyes:,, let a p.o'd doc get ahold of one of these youngsters and im sure they would prefer getting a bite from a RN any ole day, i know i would. Even if nurses tend to be a little sharp,, at least we arent quite as nasty about things as docs can be. Ive seen the most experienced nurses brought to tears by a nasty doctor attitude.

So it's okay when nurses do it, but not when doctors do?

I agree, a lot of a new nurse's success depends upon the new nurse. But in my present job, I often orient new hires. I don't find it takes any longer to be civil than to be rude. Sometimes, I even have time to be polite. I do try to warn people that they need to be fairly thick-skinned in certain times and certain places, and they usually learn quickly which nurses are nasty. (Luckily, on my unit, none of the nurses are downright nasty. A couple probably would like to be, but they don't get away with it. Most are genuinely decent, which is a big reason I'll be doing my nursing there.)

I take "eating their young" to mean a certain readiness to pounce on any mistake, even a minor one, to badger and berate. Or just make conditions so unpleasant the new nurse can't tolerate them. This happens. It isn't the norm, but it happens. Sometimes it happens under the rationale of "toughening them up." It isn't a favor. It's wrong.

In my work, I've made a number of mistakes, some of which were potentially very serious. I'm rarely in a position where my decision effects morbidity and mortality, and when I am the correct decision is to get a nurse, fast.

But I've made at least one error that put a patient at greater risk, and when it happened, my manager used it as a learning opportunity. Nothing harsh about it: this is why it was wrong, this is what you should have done. Period.

I'm lucky. Unless I'm completely stupid, the nurses I'll be working with will be pulling for me to do well. Can't get through a shift, now, without 10 people asking how school is going. It helps that I've already had the chance to prove my willingness to do whatever needs done and hang in there when it gets rough. But I still think a brand new nurse no one has met deserves that same opportunity.

The real world is not nursing school. No doubt about that. But if anyone has forgotten, nursing school is HARD. I just can't believe many dilettantes get through it. If people want to be taken seriously as RN's, then we ought to recognize that just having the title proves something. If we don't, who will?

[BETSRN]

Begalli - you are great at stating the obvious, so thanks!!

Tweety, I love new nurses with A-1. A little crispy on the outside, tender inside. :)

I too think that this is an overdone concept. There are a couple of reasons, as you stated, that people might feel that they aren't welcomed. We are busy, we are tired. Another is some people are just not good at teaching. Another is some people are jerks. That isn't limited to nursing. I'm not sure the answer to training new employees is matching them with another nurse. Do we get paid extra to proctor? (I guess some do but we don't).

Maybe hire a new hire orienter period. ha ha

steph

Personally, I love to precept new nurses. Those of you who do not enjoy it should not commit to doing so. It makes for a negative experience all around.