Nurses Eating Their Young is NOT Okay

I have read a few posts stating that "nurses eat their young" is okay and part of entering the nursing profession. I disagree... whole heartedly, adamently and passionately. This is never okay. Not even a little bit. Nurses Announcements Archive Article

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Nursing is a very challenging profession. Effective nurses who make a difference in the lives of their patients and patient families, who collaborate with other nurses and those on a team and for those who want to affect positive change within the nursing profession use every part of who they are as a person. We use our critical thinking skills through objective and subjective data, we use our tactile skills and ability to manage complex equipment. We utilize communication skills and the ability to be compassionate and kind in the face of difficult situations... toward patients, families and the nurses who work with these patients and families. After pulling all of this together, we advocate for our patients and their families and support our fellow nurses in their feat to do the same.

In what world does a person come out of nursing school with all of the abilities above. None of us. This is a difficult process that takes time to understand and is an ability that is ever-growing with each experience and reflection about our experiences.

When there is an intention to "take someone down a notch" or "show them" what it means to be a nurse, my tolerance is null. This is called bullying behavior and it is real and not exaggerated in the minds of those experiencing it.

By exhibiting these behaviors, one chooses to prevent new nurses from asking questions and building knowledge and confidence within their practice. It is wrong and it is unkind to suppress knowledge toward these nurses and send them home feeling like failures. These new nurses are not failures. They graduated from accredited programs and passed the licensing board... just like you.

They come into our practice with current evidenced-based practice knowledge and with passion and enthusiasm for the nursing profession. How dare any seasoned nurse squelch this. We can learn from new nurses while teaching what we have learned through experience.

Furthermore, many of us learn by example. Those who use bullying behaviors are showing by example that after you take a new nurse down and then build them back to your standard (not their own), they in turn, will do the same to nurses entering the profession after them.

How do you expect our profession to grow and build the respect it deserves if you hold someone to your own personal standard?

I teach in an undergraduate nursing program. I have seen nurses I have taught go fast and furious beyond what I am doing at the bedside. I have my own agenda and am on my own path. I welcome the nurses I taught and teach to do their thing and set their own expectations. I would never set those expectations for them.

New nurses... go out into the nursing world with those idealistic views learned in nursing school. Stand by your values and never follow a crowd that does not follow your heart. You are capable of anything you want to achieve. There are those that can put a bump in your road and make your journey more difficult.

So be it. YOU are in charge of your destiny. You choose what you will accomplish and do in this world. YOU have the choice to follow in the steps of a bully or make your own path. Find those beautiful mentors that support you and in time, you will emulate them and give the same to others what they gave to you.

I know this because I have had and still have those mentors and have also had contact with those that choose bullying behaviors. I choose to emulate the beautiful people. Those are the people who have unknowinly advanced my practice... and I have chosen to provide the same support to nurses entering the profession.

Lets stick together and make the nursing profession what it is supposed to be. I support every new nurse out there. You do the same as you build your practice.

Related topics...

Why do nurses eat their young?

Nurses Eating Their Young, A Different Perspective

Watch Nurses eating their young video...

Specializes in MDS/ UR.

Only person I would entertain eating is Norman Reedus and/or Sean Bean.

To have support does not mean to coddle or to not be honest or to not say things outright and truthfully. However, if a new nurse or a new nurse to a unit cries or appears frazzled, I think an appropriate question would be, "What is the matter and what is making you react this way?" The rolling of eyes or to state to the person or behind someone back or to have the thought in the mind of a nurse on the unit or a preceptor, "Suck it up. Life isn't fair", is cruel and uncalled for in our profession and for those in the healthcare profession.

I believe that none of us need to contribute to the demise of anyone. If someone is not going to succeed, it will not be because of lack of support from me or those that choose to support a new nurse on a unit. The research shows that bullying within the nursing profession is greater than in other profession.

I talk to nursing students that have great minds and spirit and want to join our profession with the passion to contribute to excellent nursing care. Unfortunately, part of my job is preparing them for what they may encounter once they leave the security of having a clinical instructor to help them fight their battles.

Stop putting expectations on a new nurse that are unattainable. The expectation is already high. Teach new nurses and guide them. Support these new nurses and make them feel like part of a team. If a new nurse is not on a unit that is appropriate in regard to knowledge, pace or thought of a unit as a whole, then guide them in an appropriate direction.

I've read some of the posts in regard to my initial post. Some of the posts are flippant, disregarding and with an intent to "make fun" of what my opinion is toward the experience of new nurses. Every person is entitled to their opinion and I respect that.

I choose my way to walk on this earth and so do those that choose a different path. I am not perfect, but I will always choose my best to show kindness and support to someone who is taking a similar path and with an intent to make a difference in the lives of patients, families, the community and our profession.

Specializes in OB-Gyn/Primary Care/Ambulatory Leadership.

I've read some of the posts in regard to my initial post. Some of the posts are flippant, disregarding and with an intent to "make fun" of what my opinion is toward the experience of new nurses.

Nah, it's just that NETY is so overdone here.

In real life, I am an awesome preceptor, and I like to think I nurture students and new grads. I'm sure others that responded flippantly are similar.

Specializes in Pediatrics, Emergency, Trauma.
Nah, it's just that NETY is so overdone here.

In real life, I am an awesome preceptor, and I like to think I nurture students and new grads. I'm sure others that responded flippantly are similar.

THIS.

I used playful metaphor in one of my posts on one of my threads, and it was musconstued; there are many that have "tunnel vision" and want to see whoever that doesn't agree negative-watt times infinity, and don't look at how one posts; that's what's great about this site, you can check out posters history and see how they post before responding; but then, I let then have it their time to be so wound up they can't see objectivity.

I'm still setting up the bar for whoever wants to join me.

Specializes in Peds/Neo CCT,Flight, ER, Hem/Onc.
I talk to nursing students that have great minds and spirit and want to join our profession with the passion to contribute to excellent nursing care. Unfortunately part of my job is preparing them for what they may encounter once they leave the security of having a clinical instructor to help them fight their battles.[/quote']

So are you saying that you're actually telling them to expect to be eaten? :nailbiting:

So are you saying that you're actually telling them to expect to be eaten? :nailbiting:

Um, has the OP ever heard of the idea of "self-fulfilling prophecy"?

Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.

Unfortunately, nursing can be a brutal profession. Our employers want to push the envelope on staffing, squeeze every nickel's worth of labour out of us, and have our patients crow with delight at how fast we brought their coffee. And we're somehow supposed to keep everyone alive in spite of themselves.

So how do we help our fledglings learn to do this, when they've gotten used to the fuzzy school environment? No matter how nice, how nurturing, how supportive we are, there will always be a subset of newbies who don't want to hear it. Period. They are already perfect. We are bullies. They're planning advanced practice where they can use their REAL talent. We are jealous because we will always be low-functioning bumpkins. Etc., etc.

Note - I said subset. I've had the privilege of precepting many wonderful new nurses who went on to become even more wonderful seasoned nurses. We all have. So, can't we vent about an occasionally recurring (sometimes often) situation that we find challenging? Can't we commiserate on a nursing forum without the judgment and self-righteousness? Never mind. I know the answer to that one.

Whose round is it?

Specializes in Emergency, Telemetry, Transplant.
Unfortunately, nursing can be a brutal profession. Our employers want to push the envelope on staffing, squeeze every nickel's worth of labour out of us, and have our patients crow with delight at how fast we brought their coffee. And we're somehow supposed to keep everyone alive in spite of themselves.

That's a great point. When I started in the ED I had over 2 years of nursing experience--on step-down/tele floors. While they were busy units, I knew I had 12 hours to get stuff done. Sure, meds had to be passed on time, but I could put my charting off until 7 hours into my shift if need be.

When I came to the ED, stuff had to be done right way, and if "times" weren't good (admit order to patient going upstairs, discharge order until the patient is actually discharged, door to CT time, door to balloon time, etc, etc.) Not to mention, you have to watch all these times, while at the same time assessing, medicating, and providing other care to 5 other patients. I would not be working the ED for long. And, if I was to slow, management (mostly non-nurses) are not going to be warm and fuzzy about telling me my shortcomings. Point is, while my preceptor was not mean about it, and did not "eat" me, she did tell it to me like it is. The message was "you need to move faster," or "you need to delegate this so you can discharge the patient," or "you need to work on you prioritization skills so that we can keep patient moving." She didn't say this stuff to bully me or make me feel bad, but, rather because if I didn't improve, management would tell me this stuff--in a much less helpful manner.

Specializes in OB.

I'd like to make a proposal here: Could we ask the Allnurses Powers That Be if the term NETY as well as the written out term could be treated as other foul words are and asterisked out?

This would result in those who have an issue needing to write out what their specific problem is rather than simply using the term to claim vague bullying.

At this point either we could then respond with truly helpful comments or perhaps the writer could see how silly their complaint looks written out. (As in the "they don't socialize with me" type)

Specializes in OB-Gyn/Primary Care/Ambulatory Leadership.
I'd like to make a proposal here: Could we ask the Allnurses Powers That Be if the term NETY as well as the written out term could be treated as other foul words are and asterisked out?

OR! We could have them use a word filter, so that if anyone types the term "eat their young" it automatically changes it to a different phrase. Like "rule the world" or something.

Specializes in Cardiac.

I'm a fairly new nurse and I am so SICK of hearing these same posts about NETY this, NETY that, over and over. Suck it up, just move on. No, I don't think any nurse, young, old, new, experienced, whatever should treat another nurse inappropriately, but my God this is getting ridiculous. If you're getting treated so poorly, stand up for yourself and say something to the nurse doing it. The end. They'll probably respect you a lot more for doing that and y'all can talk it out instead of posting about it continuously in an online forum. Ugh. Sorry had to rant because these posts are just TOO much.

Specializes in Pediatrics, Emergency, Trauma.
I'm a fairly new nurse and I am so SICK of hearing these same posts about NETY this, NETY that, over and over. Suck it up, just move on. No, I don't think any nurse, young, old, new, experienced, whatever should treat another nurse inappropriately, but my God this is getting ridiculous. If you're getting treated so poorly, stand up for yourself and say something to the nurse doing it. The end. They'll probably respect you a lot more for doing that and y'all can talk it out instead of posting about it continuously in an online forum. Ugh. Sorry had to rant because these posts are just TOO much.

:up:

Future COB, welcome to the club! ;)