nurses attacking nurses

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I've been an RN for 23 years now, and there is an awful aspect of this profession that I will never get used to - nurses attacking and tearing down their fellow nurses. Nurses who seem to revel in trying to make themselves look good by trying to make other nurses look bad. Its at its worst in bedside type nursing. And worst of all in hospital nursing. I don't work in hospital nursing anymore because of it and am moving away from all patient care type situations. I can't stand it anymore. Most of the reporting that goes on is ridiculous and mean spirited. Managers need to stop feeding into this kind of nurse's behavior because it make life miserable for everyone else. I think some nurses are so scared of making a mistake themselves that they go looking for mistakes in others, and spend large amounts of their time reporting their coworkers. Or maybe they are just mean.

Specializes in critical care, PACU.

my unit is like this too. my boss talks about other nurses behind their backs and it makes me insecure, knowing that she does the same to me too.

night shift is pretty lax about writing up day shift for things even some big things but day shift will write us up for every little thing like tubing not labeled, when they dont label it themselves.

sometimes it makes me want to write them up the next time they fudge but I dont because I have a hope that they will change if I emulate better behavior. hasnt worked yet.

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its not just nurses that do this. i've worked in several different jobs, backstabbers are everywhere.

the lyrics to two songs in pop culture come to mind,..

(what they do)

(they smile in your face)

all the time they want to take your place

the backstabbers

the o'jays

[color=#444433]

[color=#444433]smiling faces sometimes they don't tell the truth

[color=#444433]smiling faces, smiling faces

[color=#444433]tell lies and i got proof

[color=#444433]the temptations

[color=#444433]

[color=#444433]

[color=#444433]"nursing, is unnecessarily hard on itself",..(me)

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my unit is like this too. my boss talks about other nurses behind their backs and it makes me insecure, knowing that she does the same to me too.

night shift is pretty lax about writing up day shift for things even some big things but day shift will write us up for every little thing like tubing not labeled, when they dont label it themselves.

sometimes it makes me want to write them up the next time they fudge but I dont because I have a hope that they will change if I emulate better behavior. hasnt worked yet.

Your job sounds a lot like mine. Do we work at the same place? lol. Yes, I have this DON who LOVES to gossip (she does this mainly on first with the first shift crew). It's like first shift can do no wrong even though they do make plenty of mistakes. It makes me sick to my stomach. I turned down day shift for that very reason.

I agree that every job has people that tear each other down, but I can't help but feel that nurses tear each other down more.

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Truth66 I love your ideas. I think alot of the misreable work environment so many of us have to live with might be improved if the catty ones had to put their cattiness in writing. And RNperdiem? You either have a very thick skin or have been very lucky. We are in a profession where there is very little margin for error. An error could be lethal to a patient. Competetive hospitals demand top notch customer service skills from their nurses at all times. I think most of us are horrified at the idea of a mistake. A mistake is our worst nightmare. I think some nurses enjoy tormenting other nurses with that terrible fear of an error. We also fear being perceived as less than skillful in dealing with difficult people, even for a moment. Heaven forbid we say the wrong thing once in awhile. The Pirhannas will be at us for even a small transgression, even if many wouldn't consider it a trangression at all. Just to be accused is a mark against you.

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Specializes in ER.

it's still so odd that in a "caring" profession, you meet some very hardened and mean people. It just is that way. I think it's that way with any profession, but even more so in nursing. I believe the reason for that is nurses have been beaten down in so many ways (patients being demanding, many tasks to do simultaneously, doctors barking orders, yelling at you for calling them, managers and directors nit picking, etc.) After a certain period of time, maybe the compassion is so buried that all that remains is this defensive person who barks first. I don't get it. There needs to be some basic education on removing your own ego, remembering it's about patient care, and maybe some hands on management approaches to removing those nurses that are the bad ones. Focus on understanding, acceptance, and general compassion for each other and their patients. :nurse:

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I keep thinking about what someone posted here about the male nurses being immune to this. I've worked in hospitals all over the US and the male nurses being immune seems to be pretty much true everywhere. Usually, no one bothers to attack them and any transgresion is forgiven without a fuss or even a mention. I think this is so because any complaints or cattiness are unlikely to have much impact here. Men tend to shrug this stuff off. Nurses and managers who enjoy causing distress in other nurses are wasting their time on a male nurse, usually. So they don't bother. Which just tends to reinforce my idea that this behavior is really sadistic at its core. Managers who take part and reinforce are as sadistic as the nurses who initiate. Many managers seem to enjoy it.

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Specializes in ER.
It happens all the time on this board as well. I am too busy trying to be a good nurse and a good educator to have time to tear others down. My guess is that those who do this must have too much time on their hands.

or no life worth living outside of the trivial work place gossip. Perhaps that is more interesting than their petty little lives. A lot like high school drama.

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Specializes in ER.
I've seen this a lot, but it always seemed like the males were immune to it. I don't know if it's because we didn't feed into the machine or if women just didn't hate us, haha.

being female (and new to where I work) and a male that is also new, we both put in work request shift changes (an email out to the masses in the department). No one knows either of us - we both are hard workers and tend to keep quiet. Both emails were worded about the same - guess who had a MILLION responses to offer to switch? He did. I think men are just less of a target in a female dominated environment.

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Many times I think that our nursing jobs do bring in stress yet I strongly believe that the most stress comes from having to be around our fellow workers who just can't leave their personal problems at home. I call it being around a disfunctional family. If the people that work with us took care of their problems at home(if you bring to work a bad problem from home it will affect your job and those who come in contact with you including your patient) patient care would not be suffering as much as it is. We need to focus on doing our job well to the best of our abilities and as a team. All this pulling of hairs and writing each other up can only create an environment that only trouble makers are comfortable in. When someone gets written up let it be for the right reasons. I also think that if someone has time to go around looking at someone else for faults then they must not be putting in their share of work which in turn makes someone else work harder(too busy with someone else business that the next shift had to pick up the slack). Take an activity after work if you have got all this energy in other words get a life.

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Specializes in Tele, ICU, ED, Nurse Instructor,.
I really despise this. In my career I only had one supervisor that didn't feed into this bull. If I ever become management, I will be just like her.

I agree with you. But it a you dont feed into it. You must nip in the bud on your unit as a manager.

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Specializes in Tele, ICU, ED, Nurse Instructor,.
Amen! My workplace is so petty. It is ridiculous how some can blow the smallest things out of proportion. I have never worked somewhere that is so backstabbing as the place I work now, but like the previous poster stated it is not just nurses. I enjoy the people I work with on my shift but boy does the report room get tense when the next shift comes in. I feel like I need to put on my armor and shield. We are all there for a common goal, why is all drama necessary??:uhoh3: I'm just trying to get along with everyone!

There are too many women working together. The raging hormones is a killer.

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"There are too many women working together. The raging hormones is a killer." - lkwashington

You guessed that one right!!!! :lol2:......but it all depends! Well, a friend of mine that took and finished the refresher course experienced viciousness from some of her fellow students. It only take a "Queen Bee" to buzz around the hive and get alliances from her "minions" to tear down my friend. My friend was somewhat affected, but that DIDN'T STOPPED her from finishing the course especially the clinicals.

This girlfriend of mine, the sweetest down-to-earth gal, with high degree, ready to lend a hand, she's cute too (she really doesn't need to get a job but she loves to help people who are sick - gosh her hubby who got money, loved and adored her).........liked by lots of people in our place, BUT this ONE WITCHY *****, I'm sure you are reading here too, just can't get over my friend!....And oh, you "Queen Bee" (like a baby bird, all mouth and full of ****) this is one thing I can say to you for my friend: "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt" ----- Abraham Lincoln ............Remember; small town, big hell! :p

But the only thing I can say to this "Queen Bee" and her fellow minions, I can understand why all of you wanted to hurt and destroy my friend because you are miserable probably on your ownself and the surrounding, jealous and probably envious, fake, insecure, just plain mean, guaranteed being BULLIED before too, so they are looking for somebody that they can bully around to make them look superior!.....Geez, we are no longer in junior high! GET A HOBBY!

My friend, she's now happy and with around good people. So happy for her and an awesome fellow nurse of mine too!

Sorry for my french words, it just boiled me to read how mean other nurses to fellow nurses. I told my girlfriend she should have confronted the *******, but she said, "not worth it but time will come that karma is like a boomerang". She smiled and said, let's go ballroom dancing!

Those who are been bullied by some nurses, don't be like them. Let's support one another not destroying each other. PEACE!

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