Nurse Bully, please protect your young: "Don't eat them"
Nurses are divided in two groups. The first is tough skin, and strong willed. The second is sweet, angelical, compassionate and don’t have a mean bone in their body. When group number one gets frustrated they take their grievances to the young and docile. Please don’t do it Mr. bully. Have some guts and face your boss and his rules, the ones you really have a problem with.
I believe nurses are very special individuals. Think about it. They are professionals who take care of others in their dire moments. They patiently heal the putrid wounds of some; calm the fear and hopelessness of others; tolerate ingratitude and hostility daily; endure day after day of toiling around the sick and dying. Is only natural you'll find compassionate and warm hearted beings among nurses. I have been in other professions and the contrast is clear to me.
But because nursing is a tough job; some of us develop a thick skin. In a way, is a protection mechanism some develop to survive - you either get tough or you die. Although there is nothing wrong with being tough, some nurses can become quite aggressive and hostile to other nurses. We all have met them at some point, I surely did. But even being aggressive and assertive, nurses cannot match the aggressiveness of some bosses. Oh yes, let's talk about them bosses.
But bosses are people too. Yes, there are reasons why nurse bosses are sometimes so bossy. But bosses also have their though fights to fight. They too must develop an even tougher skin to survive the trials and tribulations of health care. Sometimes bosses are just nurses who left the floor because they simply couldn't take it anymore. Then to find even more stress in management.
Nurses are usually between a rock and a hard place. They have lots of responsibility, but lack the power to make decisions on their own. Doctors have much more say so in regards to their professional lay out. They call the shots, they can fire patients and are respected by most. Nurses on the other hand need to make decisions but always filtered by a set of rules created by others. Nurses must endure whatever BS is thrown at them. If you have an abusive patient, all you can do is to write a note and hope for the best. Most nurses can't simply fire a patient or they'll get fired.
Nurses run the show but are told how things should run. Often by someone who is deciding for them from an office chair; people who never worked on a floor or have not worked in years and can't remember anything. So, nurses are in a pressure cooker situation. Pressure from all sides and not an outlet in sight.
Well actually there is: and that is to relief the pressure on the least dangerous and inconsequential outlet - the young and vulnerable ones. The perplexed and scared nurslings are the recipient of a lot of pent-up anger. But why older nurses engage in this predatory and coward behavior?
It must be their inability to change the system and claim their power. Their extreme frustration lead them to eat their young. The ones they should be nourishing, protecting and grooming to take nursing to the next level just got eaten for lunch. Just like scared animals - they step on their own eggs. This is unfortunate.
If young nurses were well groomed and nurtured they would be the ones able to take nursing to the next level. Instead nurses create a culture of perpetuating the errors inflicted in them by transferring it to the young.
Protecting the young
Again, if you want to bully someone bully the oppressor and not the oppressed. Bully your problems and not the people who are here to learn. The bully energy is good energy but wasted and pointed in the wrong direction.
The alternative to bullying is to preserve and protect the young: because teaching the young the right ways is the only viable way to change nursing culture. It changes things because the young always will change the world. But instead we teach them the culture of bullying. We create perfect students in the art of bullying others. Nothing changes.
So, Mr. Bully next time you decide to torture the young, think of why you went into nursing back in the day. Bullying the young will only perpetuate the culture of abusiveness you were ounce, and continues to be a victim of.
Well here goes one more time ... I was bashed by Ruby Vee for saying that I was hired directly out of my BSN program to become an SICU nurse and my skills were equal to a diploma nurse hired on the same day. I was promoted within months to charge nurse in the unit when I passed my boards. I went on to the ER and the OR heading an open heart surgery team . I worked psych, then became a Health Care Facilities Suryeyor and worked for the BON for my state. Please don't become a crusty old bat or let anyone bully you.
Here goes one more time? Do you make a habit of repeatedly making comments broadcasting your negative opinion of Ruby Vee? This seems aggressive. Please stop perpetuating this culture of abusiveness.
Oh good Lord. Disagreeing with you is not bashing or bullying you. By the way, I still think a diploma nurse on her first day has far superior "skills" to a BSN new grad, especially in the SICU. But that would be a difference of opinion, not an example of me bullying youl
Here's the link to the "bashing" you were complaining about.
No bashing; just disagreement. I wonder how many years you would hold a grudge if I did bash you.
That's an older thread - from 2015. I wonder why it came up now that you were bashing/bullying.
In my own experience here on AN, Ruby has simply been straightforward and clear about her thoughts.
Sometimes that rubs people the wrong way.
As to walking out of report . . . there have been times when the oncoming nurse will simply not hush and let me finish report before asking questions and yeah, I've felt like walking out myself.
Lateral violence is a topic I discuss with my junior nursing students before they set foot in the clinical setting; however, nothing I can say prepares them for the incivility and sometimes, down-right hostility, many of them experience from a staff nurse. The behavior ranges from statements such as "I don't have time to teach today" to ignoring the student's presence completely. What many nurses do not realize is that the student models his or her behavior on what they see in the clinical setting and the cycle of incivility will not end until we change the way we treat each other. As nurses, each of us are educators, and it is part of our role to educate students and set an example for them to follow. We do not tell patients and families that we "do not have time to teach" them post-op care or medication information because it is part of our role as a nurse.
Our profession should be above such behavior. We are professionals and should behave as such, through our words and our actions. Before you tell me that I do not have a clue about the "real" world of nursing because I am in academia, and that my thoughts are both idealistic and unrealistic, please know this is only my second year as a professor...after practicing in the real world of nursing (ED, ICU, surgery, and rehab) for 30 years.
Lateral violence is a topic I discuss with my junior nursing students before they set foot in the clinical setting; however, nothing I can say prepares them for the incivility and sometimes, down-right hostility, many of them experience from a staff nurse. The behavior ranges from statements such as "I don't have time to teach today" to ignoring the student's presence completely. What many nurses do not realize is that the student models his or her behavior on what they see in the clinical setting and the cycle of incivility will not end until we change the way we treat each other. As nurses, each of us are educators, and it is part of our role to educate students and set an example for them to follow. We do not tell patients and families that we "do not have time to teach" them post-op care or medication information because it is part of our role as a nurse.
I think you are oversimplifying things. It is the nurses job to teach patients/families, of course. That is part of what they pay us for. But they don't pay extra to the floor nurses to teach students.
It isn't like the medical education system, where physicians who choose to work in a teaching hospital agree to that obligation by working there and are then considered faculty. These floor nurses are given no option and no incentive.
the nurse who walks out on report does this often... to almost all the newbies actually. so i shouldn't take it personally.
she stopped walking out on me when i told her my charge nurse wanted me to write her up for not removing a foley (per hospital policy AND MD order) she deliberately disobeyed. i didn't ... i should've? i'm not sure... oh well. she's friendlier nowadays.
Lateral violence is a topic I discuss with my junior nursing students before they set foot in the clinical setting; however, nothing I can say prepares them for the incivility and sometimes, down-right hostility, many of them experience from a staff nurse. The behavior ranges from statements such as "I don't have time to teach today" to ignoring the student's presence completely. What many nurses do not realize is that the student models his or her behavior on what they see in the clinical setting and the cycle of incivility will not end until we change the way we treat each other. As nurses, each of us are educators, and it is part of our role to educate students and set an example for them to follow. We do not tell patients and families that we "do not have time to teach" them post-op care or medication information because it is part of our role as a nurse.
It is not the floor nurses responsibility to do the job which YOU are being paid to do.
Lateral violence is a topic I discuss with my junior nursing students before they set foot in the clinical setting; however, nothing I can say prepares them for the incivility and sometimes, down-right hostility, many of them experience from a staff nurse. The behavior ranges from statements such as "I don't have time to teach today" to ignoring the student's presence completely. What many nurses do not realize is that the student models his or her behavior on what they see in the clinical setting and the cycle of incivility will not end until we change the way we treat each other. As nurses, each of us are educators, and it is part of our role to educate students and set an example for them to follow. We do not tell patients and families that we "do not have time to teach" them post-op care or medication information because it is part of our role as a nurse.
Our profession should be above such behavior. We are professionals and should behave as such, through our words and our actions. Before you tell me that I do not have a clue about the "real" world of nursing because I am in academia, and that my thoughts are both idealistic and unrealistic, please know this is only my second year as a professor...after practicing in the real world of nursing (ED, ICU, surgery, and rehab) for 30 years.
It's part of the nursing role to educate your students under any working conditions?
Do you really not believe that your program puts additional stress on an already stretched nurse?
Do you ensure that your students are assigned to a nurse who has had their assignment adjusted to accommodate a student?
Have you ever considered that your program may be contributing to lateral violence?
Also many states have enacted bully laws. They are under the anti harassment laws and every organization has to have a written policy and every dept head is held accountable and must initiate an investigation if the allegations are not unfounded. But the victim who has been bullied for a period of time must come forward . Instead most move on or resign.
I think you are oversimplifying things. It is the nurses job to teach patients/families, of course. That is part of what they pay us for. But they don't pay extra to the floor nurses to teach students.
Perhaps I have oversimplied it, yet I was not aware that our jobs were broken down as such so that we are paid per task. In most nursing job descriptions, there is a line "and all other duties assigned". One could argue that training and precepting fall under this clause. I was certainly never paid specifically to empty the trash, clean up a spilled drink, or help a family member connect to the wireless internet in the hospital room, yet I have done this and more as "all other duties assigned".
Our school of nursing has an affiliation with an area hospital, so it is expected from the nurses by administration that they participate in the training and precepting of students. Just an FYI...there are systems in place that provide training...as well as a stipend to nurses who are preceptors. Perhaps these places are more to the liking of those who feel training students and new nurses is a burden.
I think my issue is that we were ALL novices at some point. How were you treated by the nurses as a student, new graduate, or simply a nurse in a new environment?
Maybe money is a motivator to some nurses. I have always looked at it as an opportunity to better my profession. For me, I am satisfied in knowing that I had a hand in the training of a nurse who may be caring for me or one of my loved ones, or who may be my supervisor some day. Think about it before you refuse to precept. You never know when it might be YOU in the bed, or this young, aspiring, and movitaved nurse may end up as your nurse manager. Everything comes back around to us. I believe it is referred to as Karma....
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
I think you are oversimplifying things. It is the nurses job to teach patients/families, of course. That is part of what they pay us for. But they don't pay extra to the floor nurses to teach students.
It isn't like the medical education system, where physicians who choose to work in a teaching hospital agree to that obligation by working there and are then considered faculty. These floor nurses are given no option and no incentive.
Exactly, and I might add, no NOTICE. They start their day, and poof, there is a student, or maybe 2, (the instructor, nowhere to be found) sprung on them. And yes, that can make the nurse a bit cranky because now her day just got about a hundred times harder. In the hospital where I worked, this is how it happened. Still, it is no reason to bully the students. But I did get annoyed when I found them in our breakroom, messing around on their cellphones, on FB or playing Candy Crush, instead of seeking learning opportunities. I guess, without their instructor to get after them, they thought they could get away with this type of behavior. So yea, that made me even crankier.
I think my issue is that we were ALL novices at some point. How were you treated by the nurses as a student, new graduate, or simply a nurse in a new environment?
I was treated very well by the majority of nurses when I first started working as a nurse. There was one woman who was a grumpy person who snapped at people in an impatient manner but she would have been the same personality if she'd chosen to be in another profession as well. It had nothing to do with being a nurse. And I wouldn't say it was bullying really. She was just a damn grumpy woman.
The DON of the local rural hospital was my mentor throughout nursing school. And continued as such until she moved across the country. She is still available through email and phone though.
All the nursing supervisors were awesome and taught me so much. As did the other floor nurses.
I refuse to lambast nursing as a home to bullies . . . older women who prey on younger women. That just isn't fair or true. I'm not a fan of passing on internet myths.
Julius Seizure
1 Article; 2,282 Posts
Here goes one more time? Do you make a habit of repeatedly making comments broadcasting your negative opinion of Ruby Vee? This seems aggressive. Please stop perpetuating this culture of abusiveness.