I am a new grad (May 04), and passed boards July 1st. I have 2 kids ages 8 and 3. My son is going into 3rd grade and we just signed a modeling contract for my daughter. I have no desire to start working. I applied at USC and got offered the position as a Trauma nurse and turned it down because I want to stay home with my kids. I feel they need me now.
Am I crazy or do others have the same concerns. I feel I worked so hard to get this degree and now I don't want to use it right now. I will maybe feel different in about 4-6 months. My family thinks I 'm crazy
I only work part time hours, and I sure do get sick of people saying, "You're luck to be able to work only a little." It's not luck, it's sacrifice. Sure, I'd love to advance in my career, I'd love to do L&D nursing or go back to school, but I'm not willing to devote myself full time plus to learning a new specialty, or advancing my career... And my kids need me now more than any job does. No, I never get Employee of the Month because I never come in extra or stay late or volunteer to pick up extra, but waking up with my kids every morning means a heck of a lot more than that ever would to me. Im glad there are nurses that can give that much, but does that mean that they are better nurses than me?.. How lucky we ALL are as nurses to be able to work different hours and schedules and still have a rewarding career!
Good luck!
kjaee, I feel your pain. I work per-diem- at more than one place. Therefore, when I'm not at one place for a while, they think I've been sitting home doing nothing. This week coming up, I'm actually working 52 hrs!! (at 3 differentplaces) Next week, I'm working 12hrs (pre-k, dancing, and MY school starts).
I totally agree with you about starting a new specialty. I so badly want to try something new, but it's just not possible. Even if I could arrange childcare (which would be very difficult), do I want to be away from my daughter to work full time right now? I just resigned from a 'challanging' per-diem position, because it was too demanding of my time, and mentally exhausting.
And about you not being a better nurse, I agree also. It looks like you don't pull your weight when staffing is low. Another thing I notice is, certain people's names are always on patient satisfaction surveys. I'm not around enough for anyone to know my name. I never get to orient anyone (which I'd love to do, because I plan to teach in 2 yrs).
Every day, my daughter asks 'Is mommy working or daddy working today??'
I am surprised by the overwhelming response you have gotten though.
Let me just say a couple of things. When you are a new grad there are plenty of things to fear and starting a new endeavor is always a little frightening. It is admirable that you want to spend the time you have with your children, also interesting that you say your third grader is starting a modeling contract. Is this a paying contract and will you be in effect managing your daughters career? Will the pay be enough to see your family through?
I don't know if your original situation was that you went to nursing school because you needed a second income for your family or if your DH maybe makes enough money to support the family and your choice was altruistic. If you already had three children at home and were able to take the time it takes to go to school it seems you would be able to find time to work.
My feeling is that as a new grad if you do not get a job and get at least one year experience in nursing your skill will not only not flourish but will be non existant. Working as a nurse is really very different than nursing school. If down the road you decided to get a job as a nurse you would still basically be a new grad only you would be a new grad that has waited a year or whatever to begin actually learning outside the classroom and you will still be a nurse that needs a first year of experience before you can get most jobs that require experience. What I am saying is that just because you have had a lisence for a year does not mean that you can begin applying for jobs that require a years experience, you will still be a new grad.
I would recommend working at least part time just to get your career off the ground. This will probably require that you give up 12 weeks for orientation, before you could actually begin part time but in the long run your career will be stronger because you went to work and set a foundation for your career.
It is wonderful you can and want to saty at home-I did it.
However, beware of what happens to your knowledge and skills after not using them for even a short period of time. I spent 6 years at home after graduating and becoming an RN. When I went to get a job, I felt nervous. I didn't think I could adequately take care of patients. I had forgotten a lot! I placed myself in an area where I felt the most comfortable and tried to refresh myself!! Many states now have laws in place that address nurses who do not have so many hours of work per year or per # years. Be sure you check into all that-before making any long-term decisions. You may find yourself in a refresher course-not necessarily a bad thing-but time consuming and more money and sometimes a time committment to a certain place afterwards. It might be a good idea to work per diem or part-time to keep skills up to date. Think of all options before just letting go of the time and money you have invested! Good luck-and hug those kids!!
I chose nursing as a second career and I feel I have far MORE flexibility than I ever did as a teacher. Granted, I wanted to work and I still love it. My point is you had better get some nursing experience BEFORE you decide anything. You can work very minimally after a period of orientation. Why did you bother to do all that work and effort of nursing school and then not want to use this new knowledge? Seems like a waste to me.
I am a new grad (May 04), and passed boards July 1st. I have 2 kids ages 8 and 3. My son is going into 3rd grade and we just signed a modeling contract for my daughter. I have no desire to start working. I applied at USC and got offered the position as a Trauma nurse and turned it down because I want to stay home with my kids. I feel they need me now.
Am I crazy or do others have the same concerns. I feel I worked so hard to get this degree and now I don't want to use it right now. I will maybe feel different in about 4-6 months. My family thinks I 'm crazy
Please help.
Tara
I am not mad at you, Tara you do what you have to do for you and your family. You are very fortunate to able to have that choice I say do it! Enjoy the life with your babies I can't speak for other women but if I had the choice I would be home. You may change your mind but at least you have that option. Nursing is not going anywhere just don't let your RN expire keep that current because you never know. :-) Congradulations!!!!!!
MSMC I know you are not a spoiled brat and it is evident you have worked very hard to get where you are. Again, I know what kind of conflicts you are dealing with. I am also fortunate enough at this time that I am not having to work (this doesn't mean I live a life of leisure, we still must be frugal and I do without things that would make life easier like dental and health insurance) . Still, I consider it better to do without and be here for my kids instead of being tied to the drudgery of a full-time job where your kids grow up and you miss out on special times together that you will never get back.
And there is no way you should let anyone make you feel guilty for allegedly taking the place of someone who needs to support their family. I suppose some could say the same thing about me, since the only thing I have done with my LPN education is work part-time and (mostly) prn when there were other people who would like to have had my place in the nursing program who had children who depended on them for support and would have worked full-time when they got finished therefore making them more worthy of the place in the class I took up. I'm not going to lose 30 seconds sleep over worrying about that and you shouldn't either.
And there is no way you should let anyone make you feel guilty for allegedly taking the place of someone who needs to support their family. I suppose some could say the same thing about me, since the only thing I have done with my LPN education is work part-time and (mostly) prn when there were other people who would like to have had my place in the nursing program who had children who depended on them for support and would have worked full-time when they got finished therefore making them more worthy of the place in the class I took up. I'm not going to lose 30 seconds sleep over worrying about that and you shouldn't either.
No they can't! You don't have to work full time nursing to be of value! You're filling quite a need there, PRN nurses are needed! Flexible part-time nurses are needed! And quite honestly, children also need their mothers! You are doing a great service to society in both aspects of your life. I call it having the best of both worlds and one of the wonderful things about nursing as a career is it's incredible flexibility so that you can carry your other responsibilities more easily.
No, the poster who commented on this was saying she felt it would be a shame for someone to go through nursing school (ie taking a "spot") and then not work at all... which of course would imply that your newly learned skills would be forgotten and your ability to remain licensed would eventually be in jeapordy as well... which the poster felt resulted in a wasted spot in the program. It's an opinion, it does make a point, and it is of value.. but it doesn't apply to your situation or, as it turns out, to the OPs either.
Specializes in Gerontological Nursing, Acute Rehab.
[quote=bonemarrowrn
And about you not being a better nurse, I agree also. It looks like you don't pull your weight when staffing is low. Another thing I notice is, certain people's names are always on patient satisfaction surveys. I'm not around enough for anyone to know my name. I never get to orient anyone (which I'd love to do, because I plan to teach in 2 yrs).
Well, where does it say that I have to come in every time they are short (which is hardly ever, thank goodness). I wouldn't call that not pulling my weight. That's why they have per diem nurses. I just chose not to make it my problem. Why is it that I (or anyone else) would be judged by how much extra I work. Maybe this is what the OP is worried about. I work hard when I'm there and help out as much as I can, (and got an excellent review, BTW), but the point was that there are still a lot of different ways that a nurse can work and still devote most of her time to her family if she wishes. Just don't expect the recognition and awards. And I don't. :)
I hear what you are saying. This is just a thought and may not suit you, but I will share this. Take an internship or preceptorship (usually 3 to 6 months and 40 hours a week) and then move to stat pool after completion which would require a weekend or two per month. You would need to be upfront with this idea and you may not find support for it, but you never know if someone would be willing to train you for stat pool or float pool. It would require you to spend the next 3 to 6 months of training so you could move to this position, but it would seem to offer the best of both worlds.
Just a thought :-)
Hi everyone,
I am a new grad (May 04), and passed boards July 1st. I have 2 kids ages 8 and 3. My son is going into 3rd grade and we just signed a modeling contract for my daughter. I have no desire to start working. I applied at USC and got offered the position as a Trauma nurse and turned it down because I want to stay home with my kids. I feel they need me now.
Am I crazy or do others have the same concerns. I feel I worked so hard to get this degree and now I don't want to use it right now. I will maybe feel different in about 4-6 months. My family thinks I 'm crazy
ReinventingMyselfAgain, MSN, RN
1,954 Posts
kjaee, I feel your pain. I work per-diem- at more than one place. Therefore, when I'm not at one place for a while, they think I've been sitting home doing nothing. This week coming up, I'm actually working 52 hrs!! (at 3 differentplaces) Next week, I'm working 12hrs (pre-k, dancing, and MY school starts).
I totally agree with you about starting a new specialty. I so badly want to try something new, but it's just not possible. Even if I could arrange childcare (which would be very difficult), do I want to be away from my daughter to work full time right now? I just resigned from a 'challanging' per-diem position, because it was too demanding of my time, and mentally exhausting.
And about you not being a better nurse, I agree also. It looks like you don't pull your weight when staffing is low. Another thing I notice is, certain people's names are always on patient satisfaction surveys. I'm not around enough for anyone to know my name. I never get to orient anyone (which I'd love to do, because I plan to teach in 2 yrs).
Every day, my daughter asks 'Is mommy working or daddy working today??'