My question is: Why are nurses so mean to each other?

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Hello everyone!

I am not here to complain; however, I would like to vent just a little. I was recently let go from a job because my boss believed someone who was not an RN take a comment totally out of text and she believed them instead of me. I am surviving - however, my point is this: why do nurses have to sabatauge other nurses and make their lives miserable? I do have to say the meanest people I have ever met are in the field of nursing and it makes me wonder what good I actually do in this field. I have yet to find my nitch and have been an RN for 5 years now. Please write and tell me I am not the only nurse in the world who feels that she cannot trust anyone and that other nurses are so mean and nasty it makes what I do not seem worth it. Thanks for listening!:D

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
generally speaking man's inhumanity to man can't compare in viciousness to women's inhumanity to women.

in my opinion.

spanish inquisition? the crusades? that was all men - women had no power in those societies!

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
hello everyone!

i am not here to complain; however, i would like to vent just a little. i was recently let go from a job because my boss believed someone who was not an rn take a comment totally out of text and she believed them instead of me. i am surviving - however, my point is this: why do nurses have to sabatauge other nurses and make their lives miserable? i do have to say the meanest people i have ever met are in the field of nursing and it makes me wonder what good i actually do in this field. i have yet to find my nitch and have been an rn for 5 years now. please write and tell me i am not the only nurse in the world who feels that she cannot trust anyone and that other nurses are so mean and nasty it makes what i do not seem worth it. thanks for listening!:D

your question presupposes that nurses are "so mean to each other." you are not the only person who feels that way, but i have to wonder if this is your experience, what you are contributing to the problem. it hasn't been my experience that "nurses are so mean to each other." if you're continually having problems with other people in your profession, you may want to take a long, hard and sober look at what you are bringing to the interactions.

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
i believe it is women in general. we can be catty, mean-spirited and just plain nasty to each other. this is my second career. in my first one i worked in a male-dominated field and never dealt with the ***** that i do now. i keep to myself at work, never, never talk about my personal life or get in on the gossip with staff. i really don't think it is just in nursing. when i go to work i am there for my patients; not to make a best friend. i will just not be a part of anything

that brings me down!:twocents:

i think it's wrong to bash a whole gender. if you're having problems with women in general, once again, i have to wonder what you're contributing to the problem. i have not found that women in general are catty, mean-spirited or nasty so perhaps you're doing something that makes your own gender behave that way toward you. perhaps it is your assumption that women are mean and nasty . . .

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After working in a male dominated profession for 25 years I was blown away when I entered nursing school. It wasn't the nursing part of it, but the "female" part of it that often left me wondering why women often treat each other in a demeaning way.

You won't find a group of men standing around whispering about another mans weight, his clothing choice, hair style, or how he is bad father because he chooses to work while his infant son is daycare.

On a recent thread the subject the OP was speaking of was totally turned into- how fat is too fat and what constitutes middle age. In the middle of the sniping back and forth, another poster asked, "What, did we all get our periods the same day!"And she was right! I don't think men would converse on a forum in this way. My husband never comes home from the office and says, "Geez, you should have seen what Larry wore to the office today. He looked sooo fat!"

Women can be catty They can be nasty. Instead of coming together to support each other we are often each others worst enemies.

This probably stands out more to me, because in my "other life" I was never subjected to this.

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Specializes in Med-Surg.
And she was right! I don't think men would converse on a forum in this way.

I beg to differ on this one. Especially on unmoderated forums, men are vicious on the internet. While they may not complain about how fat someone looks they definately question the intelligence of another poster in a most unflattering manner.

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seriously, if nursing was comprised of mostly men, does anyone think we'd still have the image problems that we do?

does anyone really think it would be saturated w/the pervasive disrespect and scapegoating?

somehow i strongly feel if nurses were mostly men, we wouldn't have half the problems we do now...

because men as a whole, wouldn't put up with it.

instead, we women become everyone's doormat, with resultant frustration taken out on ea other.

now, let me emphasize that this does not pertain to all females.

but as a group, yes, we tend to be martyrs then lash out unconstructively.

i'm sorry ladies, but things will never change until we start w/ourselves.

leslie:twocents:

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I beg to differ on this one. Especially on unmoderated forums, men are vicious on the internet. While they may not complain about how fat someone looks they definately question the intelligence of another poster in a most unflattering manner.

Oh my gosh, are you ever right on this topic!!! I recently joined my local newpaper forum and it is mostly men and they are terrible, mean, ugly, rude, and the use of profanity is amazing.

Let's face it . . there are nice folks and mean folks and they come in ALL genders.

steph

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Specializes in LTC & Correctional Nursing.

well crap...i figured it would get better when i got out of school...i guess it is this was across the board and you just have to be the best you can be and rise above all of the immature bs and hope everyone else follows suit. good luck and big hugs to you all.:redpinkhe

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seriously, if nursing was comprised of mostly men, does anyone think we'd still have the image problems that we do?

does anyone really think it would be saturated w/the pervasive disrespect and scapegoating?

somehow i strongly feel if nurses were mostly men, we wouldn't have half the problems we do now...

leslie:twocents:

I have to respectfully disagree with ya on this one Leslie.

Just today, one of our truck drivers was disrespectful to my husband and scapegoated him . . .weird coincidence that our situation fits your words though, huh? :D

Truck drivers are mostly men. Is that profession very respected? I know many many truck drivers (my husband is one) and for the most part these are hardworking men (and some women) who put in 14 hour days to bring our food, clothing, lumbar, etc. They don't get paid much either. Has being men given them any power over the government regulations that make it hard to make a living as a truck driver? Nope. Has it done anything to give them power over the price of diesel? Nope.

steph

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well crap...i figured it would get better when i got out of school...i guess it is this was across the board and you just have to be the best you can be and rise above all of the immature bs and hope everyone else follows suit. good luck and big hugs to you all.:redpinkhe

have you read this entire thread? many of us say this isn't true everywhere.

steph

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Specializes in Med-Surg.
seriously, if nursing was comprised of mostly men, does anyone think we'd still have the image problems that we do?

does anyone really think it would be saturated w/the pervasive disrespect and scapegoating?

somehow i strongly feel if nurses were mostly men, we wouldn't have half the problems we do now...

because men as a whole, wouldn't put up with it.

instead, we women become everyone's doormat, with resultant frustration taken out on ea other.

now, let me emphasize that this does not pertain to all females.

but as a group, yes, we tend to be martyrs then lash out unconstructively.

i'm sorry ladies, but things will never change until we start w/ourselves.

leslie:twocents:

Men invented the phrase "it's a dog eat dog world" about themselves, so things wouldn't be lovey dovey if men took over. Frankly, I'd hate to see that. I much rather see you're idea of women starting with themselves. Women are taking over the MD profession, and clearly over 50% of student doctors are females. How are they conducting themselves, now that it's a female dominated profession?

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Men invented the phrase "it's a dog eat dog world" about themselves, so things wouldn't be lovey dovey if men took over. Frankly, I'd hate to see that. I much rather see you're idea of women starting with themselves. Women are taking over the MD profession, and clearly over 50% of student doctors are females. How are they conducting themselves, now that it's a female dominated profession?

who's looking for "lovey-dovey"?

whether it would be dog eat dog individually or collectively, i still don't think that men would tolerate the abuse, the staffing, the manipulative behaviors.

addressing those issues alone, would take a tremendous burden off our current state of affairs.

i'm trying to understand your analogy of female medical students to nsg students.

i'm not sure we're comparing apples to apples since the issues aren't the same...

leslie

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