My husband doesn't want me on ALLNURSES

wolf9653 · Apr 8, 2016

I see on a few threads, people jumping the gun IMHO telling someone to leave their spouse. I think this is terrible advice, for people you don't hardly know, if at all. I would sooner see people exhaust all possible avenues of repairing the partnership. It's the easy out to just walk away, it takes effort and patience to maintain a relationship. and it's real easy and catty to trash someone else's. Now on this topic, let me see what happens if I swap the roles here. She wants him to take out the garbage. Don't sound too bad does it? it's a request. I didn't see a demand in her original post. It didn't say he won't let her, it didn't say he said he was going to beat her up. It sounded like he was a concerned partner. Maybe there is more to it, maybe not. But the real question was how safe do people here feel with the anonymity of the board.. Not whether or not to get a divorce. I've been through one, and wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

Davey Do · Apr 8, 2016

Or...

OldDude · Apr 8, 2016

She said "new" flesh.

Ouch.

Farawyn · Apr 8, 2016

Ouch.

*hugs*

CrunchRN, ADN, RN · Apr 9, 2016

You just need to work harder on his training lol.

dec2007 · Apr 12, 2016

"Live never to be ashamed if anything you do or say is published around the world- even if what is published is not true."
-Richard Bach

Love this!! Do you know which book?

Guest941822 · Apr 12, 2016

(Pardon my rant:)

Ugh. I see so many people calling OP's hubby controlling, in need of therapy, etc, just because he expressed his preference, which is different from hers (and out of concern for her safety and continued anonymity).

If the situation were reverse, and a wife had expressed her preference to her husband's posting, the majority of you would never call her controlling or assume she's in need of therapy.

And you ladies who say, "You're an adult; do what you want!" Is that what you tell your husband-- do whatever he wants, without your input or opinion, or any consideration for how it will affect you? Doubtful. Rather selfish advice, imo. Marriages are unions, or should be. Single people do whatever they want. Married people love each other, so they consider one another.

Sometimes I think "Happy wife = happy life" is one of the saddest truths there is. We can really make our men miserable if our every whim isn't catered to and every desire fulfilled.

Anyway, I prefer to honor and respect my spouse enough to consider his opinions and preferences. Even if we disagree, my marriage is much more important than any of you or an online forum. But to each his/her own.

Perhaps a good heartfelt discussion between the two is in order for OP and spouse, and I'm sure they'll come to an agreement of some sort without the input of hundreds of online strangers.

As another so perfectly put... Peace. Blessings to each of you.

Farawyn · Apr 12, 2016

(Pardon my rant:)
Ugh. I see so many people calling OP's hubby controlling, in need of therapy, etc, just because he expressed his preference, which is different from hers (and out of concern for her safety and continued anonymity).
If the situation were reverse, and a wife had expressed her preference to her husband's posting, the majority of you would never call her controlling or assume she's in need of therapy.
And you ladies who say, "You're an adult; do what you want!" Is that what you tell your husband-- do whatever he wants, without your input or opinion, or any consideration for how it will effect you? Doubtful. Rather selfish advice, imo. Marriages are unions, or should be. Single people do whatever they want. Married people love each other, so they consider one another.
Sometimes I think "Happy wife = happy life" is one of the saddest truths there is. We can really make our men miserable if our every whim isn't catered to and every desire fulfilled.
Anyway, I prefer to honor and respect my spouse enough to consider his opinions and preferences. Even if we disagree, my marriage is much more important than any of you or an online forum. But to each his/her own.
Perhaps a good heartfelt discussion between the two is in order for OP and spouse, and I'm sure they'll come to an agreement of some sort without the input of hundreds of online strangers.
As another so perfectly put... Peace. Blessings to each of you.

I agree with a lot of this, but OP did invite us into her world to make comments about it, so... :sarcastic:

wolf9653 · Apr 12, 2016

too bad you're already married. :up:

(Pardon my rant:)
Ugh. I see so many people calling OP's hubby controlling, in need of therapy, etc, just because he expressed his preference, which is different from hers (and out of concern for her safety and continued anonymity).
If the situation were reverse, and a wife had expressed her preference to her husband's posting, the majority of you would never call her controlling or assume she's in need of therapy.
And you ladies who say, "You're an adult; do what you want!" Is that what you tell your husband-- do whatever he wants, without your input or opinion, or any consideration for how it will affect you? Doubtful. Rather selfish advice, imo. Marriages are unions, or should be. Single people do whatever they want. Married people love each other, so they consider one another.
Sometimes I think "Happy wife = happy life" is one of the saddest truths there is. We can really make our men miserable if our every whim isn't catered to and every desire fulfilled.
Anyway, I prefer to honor and respect my spouse enough to consider his opinions and preferences. Even if we disagree, my marriage is much more important than any of you or an online forum. But to each his/her own.
Perhaps a good heartfelt discussion between the two is in order for OP and spouse, and I'm sure they'll come to an agreement of some sort without the input of hundreds of online strangers.
As another so perfectly put... Peace. Blessings to each of you.

wolf9653 · Apr 12, 2016

I think the OP wanted feedback on internet privacy, not about her marriage.

I agree with a lot of this, but OP did invite us into her world to make comments about it, so...

Farawyn · Apr 12, 2016

I think the OP wanted feedback on internet privacy, not about her marriage.

Which is what I gave her. I was not one of the "hubs is a control freak" posters. I supported OP throughout, and I do agree with Lanilu to an extent.

But once you post on an open forum, you cease to control the direction things take.

OP is being a great sport about this, BTW.

jag nurse, RN · Apr 13, 2016

OMG. My wife exactly. "Why do you go on that site if it upsets you so much?" Of course I mostly crab about the extrordinary stupid questions or opinions. The funny stuff I just "like" and keep reading.
Actually I have backed off quite a bit. I frequent a website on fitness and it's got even more stupid comments, so I can only handle so much.
And I talk to the TV, too.

Lol I just like reading the ridiculous scenarios that affirm that I'm not the only one going through the craziness. :laugh: