My girlfriend is afraid that I might meet another girl in the nursing program...

ssaarraahh · Apr 25, 2012

Your girlfriend needs to completely trust you. You are going to school to learn and become a nurse, not to hook up with other girls. There should not be an issue with other girls. Yes you will work with girls in nursing school but that is what happens in school. Yes, you might have to form a study group and that could involve girls. Your girlfriend needs to trust you!

I went through nursing school and I had to work with the opposite sex on projects and study groups but that never affected my relationship with my boyfriend. And nursing school should not affected your relationship with your girlfriend.

HouTx, BSN, MSN, EdD · Apr 25, 2012

"I'll be going to school with lots of beautiful nursing students" - - on behalf of nurses everywhere - THANK YOU!! You may be surprised about the demographics of your classmates. Although the majority will be female, they are likely to be married, have kids and be 40 years or older. Not to say they won't be beautiful tho - LOL!!

I would suggest that you work on communication & trust with your gf - and visit the AN forums for male nursing students & male nurses. They offer very sound advice about how to relate to your fellow students & eventual co-workers in a way that does not create problems. Nursing school is difficult enough without adding that mess.

Ayala · Apr 25, 2012

I really empathize with both of you. I'm female and married. One of the things I failed to anticipate is how hard my being in nursing school would be on my relationship with my husband. Being a nursing student is so demanding that I forget that my husband needs me too.

I hope you work things out with your partner. You will both need one another. Speaking frankly, there is very little time to socialize when you're in nursing school. The other thing is that even when you work in groups, you are so focussed on gettting the project done that any chance of romance flies out the window.

I guess I'm not the best person to give an opinion because I've been married a long time and have no romantic interest in other men. I guess it's different when you're young and single.

And as for beautiful looking nursing students - ha ha ha! By the end of the first term we all looked pretty haggard.

As sarah mentioned, it's an issue of trust. I don't mean to minimize your concerns, but television shows about the medical profession have no relation to reality. You don't have makeup artists and costume designers on hand to make you look good. And the lighting is terrible - even fresh faced 20 somethings wind up looking awful.

Nobody I know has ever "hooked up" not even for a quickie.

Good luck!

guest042302019, BSN, RN · Apr 25, 2012

I would really enjoy your girlfriend's company now. You are starting in year. It may be a bit premature to be overly concerned at this point.

As other posts said:

Work on trust. Build your relationship stronger. Use good communication. Yes, you will be around other women in school and for the rest of you nursing career. Not only only going to be around women, you'll have female patients you need to palpate, inspect, or bath.

Inform her. You won't see her nearly as much. Give her a schedule of your nursing obligations. Many people outside of the medical profession don't realize the sacrifice it takes.

Try to have a day when you do nothing related to nursing. Have some down time. A date day. Or, A date night. Focus your efforts on her needs during that day.

She is going to get frustrated and maybe lonely without you sometimes. Talk with her. Reassure her that this sacrifice is for both of us.

You will get tired, overwhelmed, and frustrated at times as well. Talk with your girlfriend and keep in the loop. Utilize the support she has to offer. It will be useful and relieving for you as well as she may feel more involved in your studies.

That's all I've got. Take care and good luck! Remember, don't stress over this too much. It's a year from now. Enjoy her and take care of this stuff when the time comes.

Horseshoe, BSN, RN · Apr 25, 2012

(I'm a male) She has some concern, but honestly I don't blame her. I'll be going to school with lots of beautiful nursing students

Umm, no, probably not. Certainly not "lots."

and we will all be working closely together.

Fair enough.

Also they say your classmates in nursing school become friends for life.

I think that is highly exaggerated. Particularly with the number of nursing students who are married with families and for whom this is a second career, this is less and less true.

This closeness with other girls seems to always threaten the current girl in your life in my experience. Also she said that I probably wont have that much time for her. 1 day per week I'm guessing??

Depending on your time management skills/other jobs/additional factors, this may be pretty accurate.

I start nursing school in 1 year from now.
I do not plan on hooking up/dating any of my classmates because 1) I love my girlfriend and she could possibly become my wife 2) I do not want to jeopardize in anyway my schoolwork.
Input?

It sounds like your girlfriend is pretty insecure. Have you given her reason to be so? Do you tend to flirt with other classmates/co-workers? If so, perhaps she has reason to worry. Regardless, a lot can happen in a year. You may or may not still be dating anyway. I'd make sure that your behavior towards your GF and towards other women with whom you work or study is top shelf. If you are trustworthy and have proven your loyalty and she continues to worry or obsess about this, perhaps she is not the right girl for you.

Juniper248 · Apr 25, 2012

television shows about the medical profession have no relation to reality. You don't have makeup artists and costume designers on hand to make you look good.

hehehehehe good point!!!

Double-Helix, BSN, RN · Apr 25, 2012

I agree that your girlfriend may have trust issues. How long have you been dating? Has she always been like that?

This could also be an indication that she isn't going to be supportive of your chosen career. Especially if she is voicing her distrust a year before you start the program. After all, you'll be working primarily with female co-workers. Is she also going to be jealous of the women that you might meet at work? Your female patients? How will she handle your OB rotation?

If you have a secure relationship, you should be able to easily convince her that you are going to nursing school to learn, not to meet girls. I guarantee that nursing school isn't going to be as glamourous as you both might be thinking. Yes, there will be some beautiful girls in your class- but there will also be other men, married women, and women in their thirties and forties and fifties. Yes, you'll be working closely with them- but that could mean standing next to them as you clean up an incontinent old man or change an infected wound. Not exactly the most romantic situations.

RNbethy · Apr 25, 2012

(I'm a male) She has some concern, but honestly I don't blame her. I'll be going to school with lots of beautiful nursing students . . . QUOTE]
You should remember that while there are lots of beautiful nursing students, you need to remind your girlfriend that she is the MOST beautiful woman in your eyes. Although you will be working closely with other students, it's the little things that you do every day to remind your girlfriend how significant SHE is that will matter. You might be very busy, but keep your date nights sacred. Good luck! :)

Pneumothorax, BSN, RN · Apr 25, 2012

Heres the lowdown and dirty> You will meet another girl when you start nursing school, however, you will soon find out that they will be the most irritating individuals you ever had the displeasure of spending 24 months with day in and day out.

You will literally kiss the ground ur gf walks on when u realize shes not like them. Tell her shes got nothing to worry about :)

Nascar nurse, ASN, RN · Apr 25, 2012

Sadly enough...what is she going to think when you start working day in and day out. In nearly any industry there are at least some beautiful women. Trust has to be the key.

imintrouble, BSN, RN · Apr 25, 2012

Threads like this make me feel so old.