Male Nurses.

karenG · Jun 2, 2003

hey Mark

I am not deaf!! nor did I mean to offend you. why should matter if your patients remember you because you are a man? I was not insinuating anything. when i worked in hospital, there were so many nurses the patients found it difficult to tell who was who- especially when you all wear the same uniform. I am not offended if my patients remember me because I am small/ fat whatever. its who I am. just as my Jamacian friend finds it funny to be referred to as the rasta nurse- thats what he calls himself!

I have not questioned the care you give- nor have I suggested that nurses who are male give any better/worse care than nurses who are female. All I said was that we are nurses. we care for people. I see no difference between the genders.

I dont think I am small minded........just think that we should remember that sometimes our patients need labels to hang on us, to help them know who is caring for them. If you were the only nurse who was green with red spots, then i guess thats what the patients would call you. Or are you lucky enough that you care for the same people all the time and they know you by name? I work in general practice and care for 9000 patient who all know me by name-but I dont remember all their names. I need tags to hang on them. what do you suggest I do?? I wil admit that some of my tags are to do with colour, sex and personality. but not sure how else to remember who they are when I meet them in the supermarket. I am open to suggestions.

going to stop now before I dig a very big hole for myself.

Karen

Anabolic_One · Jun 3, 2003

Hello to all... this is my first post on the forum so I thought It would be appropriate to post on this thread seeing as how I am a MALE.... I have been here off and on , but decided to go ahead and register and stop lurking in the shadows.... I am currently in my second year of Nursing School and I have enjoyed everything thus far... I am also one of those on their second careers.... My first degree was in Chemistry/ Biology and spent 7 years as a Chemist (3 seperate areas)...

Anyway this forum is pretty nice...

I will say the guys here get a little defensive about things...lol...

Too Funny....

Dayray, RN · Jun 3, 2003

I will say the guys here get a little defensive about things...lol...

Anabolic_One hehe just wait buddy =) you'll understand where that knee jerk reaction comes from.

Im sure it varies from area to area and between speacilties but where some of us work it's pretty bad. I can admit to being overly vigilent when it comes to this subject but I hope you can understand where that comes from. After you are put threw the ringer based on your gender a few hundred times it makes you that way.

mark_LD_RN · Jun 3, 2003

one may be defensive but it is for good reason it's not as if it has not been thrown in my face and other males a millon times already!

KarenG no matter how you try to rephrase what you said, it is still taken the same way. especially when you her it from nurses you work with. to say "the only reason a patient remembers me is because I am a male " is an insult no matter how you phrase it. some may remember me because I am male, but that is not the only reason, I can promise you that. It tok a while for others I have worked with to admitt it,but finally they see the light and admit it,that the real reason is the superior care I provide and how I fluffy and puff my patients as they say:)

like I said before it is high time gender stops being an issue. it should be of no concern for employement,patient assignments,advancement or pay.

I can tell you from experience being a male who is a nurse has been more of a hinderance than an advantage. still to this day I can not even get interviews at some hospitals because of my gender. I have to work twice as hard just to prove my self because of my gender. not once have i benifited from being male. unless you consider being called evertime a heavy patient needs to be lifted or moved ( even if on another floor i get called), or when they call dr strong or dr door only males are to respond. why heel we got some women in our hospital that could kick my but:) but again it is only based on gender not qualifications:)

Anabolic_One · Jun 4, 2003

Have to say, I agree with Karen_G.......what does it matter if they remember you because you are a man....no big deal..they might just as easy remember you if you wore neon green scrubs to work everyday...right ?

And although I am no vet in this field, only beginning my venture...Gender will always be an issue.....just the way things are......let it slide off your back bro.

As far as being a hinderance because you are a male....I dont feel that is true in my Geographic area...Most of the nurses that work in ER in two near by hospitals are male.....very obvious.....I am taking a guess -does the LD in your name stand for Labor and Delivery--if thats the area then yeah I could for see you having problems getting interviews (but Im sure thats a whole seperate thread)..... I have been told that I should have no problems getting interviews when I complete my program :cool:

teeituptom, BSN, RN · Jun 4, 2003

Howdy Ya'll

From deep in the heat of Texas

I've been an RN for almost a 1/4 of a century now. And I don't mind being referred to as a male nurse, or a nurse who is male or a nurse who happens to be male. Tltles don't bother me. I don't let misconceptions bother me. If people like to think male nurses ar homosexual let them, what they tink doesnt bother me one iota. BTW I am heterosexual. Im raising my 7th child. I have another one in oklahoma and I just discovered I still have another one all grown up now. So I think its safe for me to say Im heterosexual.

I also dont cry when my charge nurse chews me out or when she praises me or whatever. I just move onwards and upwards. I make actually quite good money, considering. But thats not because Im male, but because I have always represented myself well.

I dont mind one bit being called to lift patients or to help settle combative patients in the least, in fact I kind of enjoy those little breaks in the routine of a shifts work. I must admit though at my age I dont mend as quickly as I used to. Maybe now they will refer to me as that older male nurse hahahaha. I dont even mind being called to do foleys on male patients after all I generally call females to female caths, alls fair isnt it.

I have never been made to feel as if this has been thrown in my face a million times. And even if it had been, I wouldnt even begin to care about it. I am a Male, I am a Nurse. I am happpy and content with who and what I am. I have made my own way, and have no qualms or reservations whatsoever. I dont whine and moan like a few I know about how unfair it is being referred to as a male nurse. I actually have made a good life for myself and my family. Granted we dont drive BMWs and Jaguars but then again I dont like them anyway. Prefer my Hyundai Accent, and my Mustang 2+2. circa 1965.

Well thats about all ya'll

Doo Wah Ditty

mattsmom81 · Jun 4, 2003

Tom I think that's the longest post I've ever read of yours. And it was a good one too...! :)

karenG · Jun 4, 2003

Tom.......reminds me of the comments one of my nurse friends made...............when challanged by a sister asking if he felt inferior surrounded by women, he smiled and said ' no sister, after all, I have the ability to fertilize the entire female population of the world'!!!!!!!!!!! such a sweet moment, the sister concerned was a PITA!!

Karen

Katnip, RN · Jun 4, 2003

What I don't understand is this obsession with male nurses being gay. What is up with that?

Yes, I know a couple of gay nurses. Most I know are not. I knew a few more lesbian nurses. I never hear whispers about them.

And if someone is homosexual, what difference does that make in care?

RN2007 · Jun 4, 2003

I hope not to ruffle any male nurses feathers and certainly do not want to show disrespect toward ANY male nurse or other male practitioner, dr., etc. However, as a female myself, I would have to say that if I were in the hospital and if I could not perform my own bathing or other ADL, I would request that a note be placed on my patient chart that only a female nurse, aide, etc., be the one to provide this type care, because I would not feel comfortable with a man doing this. In the past 14 years, I have always had female gynecologists or PA perform my physicals. Of course, this might cause me to be inconvienced at times, if a female staff member is busy ,etc., and I understand this, but I purposely schedule my appointments this way, and my husband and family knows to request this for me if I am not able to do it for myself in a hospital, etc. When I used to work in a hospital many years ago, I heard many women whisper to me, "Is their a lady Dr. or lady nurse on staff?" Thank goodness, these days we no longer have to be ashamed to ask for what we want, and sometimes we might even get it. Also, in one of the threads on this forum it was nice to hear a male nurse say that due to knowing how some ladies feel that many times the staff splits up duties where the male nurses does the mens ADL and women nurses does the womens ADL, etc..., however I am sure it is not possible most of the time.

Please, I hope not to get flamed by male nurses, etc.,. I am 100% positive that the men are just as qualified to do the same nursing care, etc., but that is not the point here. Some patients are more modest than others, and some patients wish they had the guts to say something about it but just don't, and it really has nothing to do with not trusting a man, but in todays times when we are given choices, and the right to express our preferences, we should tell our health care providers what we would like. I am sure it is the same with some men not liking that women changing their diapers, etc because it is embarrassing for anybody to change them, if you think about it! When I worked in psychiatrics, I heard this exact same thing come from a very cute older man when he said to me, "Miss, can you tell me why you don't have an orderly do this, cause this is embarrassing!!...

But I know, I know... If we had to accomodate bunches of people like this all the time, nurses would never get anything done. It does make you think though or rather makes me think, lol...

Tweety, BSN, RN · Jun 4, 2003

Originally posted by RN2007
I hope not to ruffle any male nurses feathers and certainly do not want to show disrespect toward ANY male nurse or other male practitioner, dr., etc. However, as a female myself, I would have to say that if I were in the hospital and if I could not perform my own bathing or other ADL, I would request that a note be placed on my patient chart that only a female nurse, aide, etc., be the one to provide this type care, because I would not feel comfortable with a man doing this. In the past 14 years, I have always had female gynecologists or PA perform my physicals. Of course, this might cause me to be inconvienced at times, if a female staff member is busy ,etc., and I understand this, but I purposely schedule my appointments this way, and my husband and family knows to request this for me if I am not able to do it for myself in a hospital, etc. When I used to work in a hospital many years ago, I heard many women whisper to me, "Is their a lady Dr. or lady nurse on staff?" Thank goodness, these days we no longer have to be ashamed to ask for what we want, and sometimes we might even get it. Also, in one of the threads on this forum it was nice to hear a male nurse say that due to knowing how some ladies feel that many times the staff splits up duties where the male nurses does the mens ADL and women nurses does the womens ADL, etc..., however I am sure it is not possible most of the time.

Please, I hope not to get flamed by male nurses, etc.,. I am 100% positive that the men are just as qualified to do the same nursing care, etc., but that is not the point here. Some patients are more modest than others, and some patients wish they had the guts to say something about it but just don't, and it really has nothing to do with not trusting a man, but in todays times when we are given choices, and the right to express our preferences, we should tell our health care providers what we would like. I am sure it is the same with some men not liking that women changing their diapers, etc because it is embarrassing for anybody to change them, if you think about it! When I worked in psychiatrics, I heard this exact same thing come from a very cute older man when he said to me, "Miss, can you tell me why you don't have an orderly do this, cause this is embarrassing!!...
But I know, I know... If we had to accomodate bunches of people like this all the time, nurses would never get anything done. It does make you think though or rather makes me think, lol...

No flame here, I've run into that situation many times, if a patient isn't comfortable with me, then I'm not comfortable with them. It doesn't mean I feel unqualified or unable. Usually there are enough females that one can help, but sometimes they are stuck with me or stuck waiting a long time, it's their choice.

I don't cath alert and oriented females without another female in the room, so I just ask the female to do it while I step out. It's not a fair and equal world. But as a male md must have a female present to do the gyn exam, I expect a female present during pericare with an alert and oriented female. It's not a fair and equal world sometimes.

Truth be known, I'm a little shy in that area as well and if intimate care is needed, such as a catheter I'm going to request a male nurse or CNA to help me. I prefer male MDs, but if a female comes into the room to examine, I won't send her away, but if I choose a primary who is male. So I know what you are saying. Most men, however, especially oldermen don't mind females doing intimate care at all. There isn't always equality.

SmilingBluEyes · Jun 4, 2003

Tweety, Just a thought: If you are worried about cathing females who are alert and oriented, I would think you would be EVEN MORE careful with those DISORIENTED or incapacitated mentally..... I might just have a "chaperone" or "assistant" in ANY case where you are doing personal care for a female, if this is how you feel. What makes a change/alteration in mental status different, I am just wondering?