left crying!

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I dont know why but I left class crying today! We were doing health assesment and I didnt have a partner so I was just practicing on myself (lymp nodes) well the teacher made a HUGE deal out of it in class and that embarrased me so I quickly paired up with two other girls right next to me. Anyways the teacher then started telling me "what are you afraid of" I was pissed she was making such a scene she stopped the WHOLE class for this! I just said nothing and shot her a dirty look ( I know I shouldnt have but I was embarrased and pissed!) Anyway the rest of the class goes fine I do what we are supposed to do and everything. Well, I get up to leave at the end of class and the teacher came over and started talking to me. Keep in mind the WHOLE class is still there and have now crowded around my desk to see what she is going to say. She tells me I need to praticipate and do the "hands on" stuff blah blah blah and if I dont she will fail me! Its not like I didnt want to do it I just didnt want to make a big scene about not finding a partner that wasnt already paired up (we were only supposed to be in groups of two). She talked to me for about 5 minutes about how she would fail me and has failed people in the past and how am I going to make it as a nurse and all that. I was so embarrased! I didnt want to start crying in front of her or the class so I just shook my head ok and left quickly! One girl stopped me on the way out and told me how wrong she thought that was that the teacher would confront me like that and I just said Yeah and walked away with tears in my eyes. I am such a private person, but I DONT mind doing stuff in class!! I just couldnt find a partner, period! I left school crying in my car all the way home, and I dont even know why! I am sorry this is so long but I am just upset. :(

Specializes in med/surg, ortho/neuro, ambulatory surg.
I'm sorry you had to deal with this, just watch out how you say anything to this instructor. Just do not give her an opportunity to do it again.

Think like a nurse should think. If there are not enough people to make another group, ask if you should work alone, or join a group.

I would not say a thing to her about it. Do not let it show that it bothered you, or she may continue to pick on you if she is that type of person!!

Go back, think ahead, and make sure you go above and beyond expectations. Good luck. :)

:icon_hug:

When I go to class next week I am going to see how that goes if she acts like nothing happened I am going to as well, and KILL her with kindness like another poster suggested HEHE! IF she is still in her mood I will wait until class is over and discuss it with her then. Maybe she was in a bad mood or like another poster said she misunderstood why I wasnt paired up. I think I will just have to learn to speak up and get out of my "I dont know you so I cant talk to you" ways. I am very shy and I can already see this hurting future group projects I just dont like confrontation and I dont like people in my busniess. If I WANT to let them in great other wise LEAVE ME ALONE!!! Thats why I LOVE the internet so much! PATHETIC HUH! oh well off to another day of school ;)

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It is truly amazing how rude nursing instructors can be. This would never be allowed in other majors. The teachers would be fired or at least reprimanded. I majored in Computer Science and Electronics. I was treated with total respect. Nursing instructors are bad because they know schools are desperate for them and students are desperate to get in.

:yeahthat:

I don't think they are all bad, but the bad one's give the rest a bad name...

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I understand how you feel. At my very first check-off, my instructor YELLED at me because I wasn't moving fast enough. Well, that had the opposite effect that she wanted. I froze up like a deer in headlights and couldn't remember anything. When I finally finished the check-off, the instructor shot me a look and said in a demeaning tone, "You just don't get it." Just like you, I choked back my tears just long enough to get to my car.

I thought my nursing school experience was over before it had begun. Well, a friend told me, "She's testing you. She wants to see how you'll act under stress." I made up my mind that I would not flunk that test again! I went back the next week and plowed ahead as if nothing had happened. I was never close to that instructor but I did get through it and made an A in her class.

Keep your chin up and keep going forward as if this didn't happen. You'll earn the respect of your classmates and the instructor.

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Specializes in cardiac/education.

I am sorry this happened to you but apparantly, in nursing school, it is all too common!:uhoh3:

I agree with the other poster who said that nursing instructors can be so horrible! I mean, what gives them the right? We are paying to be there and to learn and we are adults, not five year olds! I am 29 years old and honestly, since entering nursing school, I feel like I have been transported back to elementary school with the meanest teacher I ever had! Actually, my teacher this block is really cool, but I already have "heard" about the others to come. So stupid! I just hope I can react calmly when the same thing inevitably happens to me.

She was mean, it was wrong, but I do agree you have to "toughen up". Or atleast figure out how you are going to GET THRU IT. Because, if you want your degree, well I guess we just have to take it!:crying2:

I think your plan sounds good. Good Luck and let us know how it goes!:)

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She was mean, it was wrong, but I do agree you have to "toughen up". Or atleast figure out how you are going to GET THRU IT. Because, if you want your degree, well I guess we just have to take it!:crying2:

I'd like to comment on the several recommendations to the OP to 'toughen up'. What does that mean exactly? That when someone of authority singles you out and humiliates you in front of your peers for something that doesn't even justify their ire, that you're weak if it affects you to the point of tears... even though you were tough enough to hold those tears until you'd gotten away?

Crying's simply an expression of emotion. And we all know that emotions run high (and not unjustifiably) in nursing school. Not only do we beat ourselves up with our own doubts about whether we're going to be able to survive, we're also conscious of everyone else sitting in judgment of whether or not we "should" be a nurse. For an instructor to do such a thing when (IMO) the OP didn't even do anything wrong is despicable and not the easiest of things to just brush off without some kind of reaction and contemplation first. I don't think she needs to toughen up at all, it seems to me she responded in pretty normal, human way.

Maybe I'm misunderstanding what y'all mean. Clarification?

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Specializes in cardiac/education.
She was mean, it was wrong, but I do agree you have to "toughen up". Or atleast figure out how you are going to GET THRU IT. Because, if you want your degree, well I guess we just have to take it!:crying2:

I'd like to comment on the several recommendations to the OP to 'toughen up'. What does that mean exactly? Clarification?

:imbar I just mean she will have to figure out how to deal with this teacher w/o leaving class crying. I am not saying that her reaction was not appropriate or justified, I am just saying she doesn't have a choice BUT TO TAKE IT if she wants her degree. I seriously doubt that they would end up firing this instructor for this; this sort of behavior seems like the norm in nursing school. Everyone has atleast one mean instructor in nursing school, usually.

The OP has the greatest sympathy from me, I feel very bad for her and I am thankful I am not in her shoes. I don't think anyone is saying she was not entitled to react the way she did, I think we are just saying that she will need to find another way of dealing with this teacher if she wants to get thru school. Alternative is drop out???:wink2:

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Key her car.................................................Ok ok ok ok, don't key her car, but believe in the power of Karma.

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Specializes in med/surg, ortho/neuro, ambulatory surg.
Key her car.................................................Ok ok ok ok, don't key her car, but believe in the power of Karma.

THATS A GREAT IDEA!!! LMFAO! thanks for the laugh! I talked to my classmates and another instructor about it today. They all said they would help me out with her if she did it again and the instructor said "she is like that dont take it personal and just get thru the class!" LOL Thanks everyone for your advice!

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The instructors are going against the law by harrassing students to the point of tears. I believe that students should stand up and speak when this kind of situation arises. If speaking to the instructor doesn't work then go over her or his head, the chairperson of the nursing program. If that doesn't work then there are other ways to go around it. The worse option is to "toughen up," "grin and bear it" and so on. This is why we end up in bad relationship because we're so co-dependent! Gotta make everybody happy in the expense of my own happiness.

I had my share of harrassment because of my disability/sexual orientation in the educational, employment, public and private arena. In situation where like in employment I would go through the proper channels to resolve the issue. But when it comes to goods and services, I just brush them off and move on. Yes at times I "tough it out" but in educational settings none of what you guys are sharing shouldn't be happening. Most educational institution are federally funded and therefore are mandated by law to equal opporunity, not singling out anyone to be subjected to harrassement.

Yes I've studied law in my undergrad degree....guess that would put it to good use when I start nursing program. So far the nursing program that I am interested in are openly and accepting of my disability. In fact I am going to their open house next week.

Moi

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Key her car.................................................Ok ok ok ok, don't key her car, but believe in the power of Karma.

DO NOT Key her car.....have someone else do it.

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I don't know this, but I am guessing that you are young. She took advantage and caught you off guard. I try to think of things to say to people like that. I had an instructor who always started class late. It irritated me. Once I walked in 15 minutes late and she reprimanded me in front of the class. I replied, "I didn't know that we were starting on time today." Everyone burst out laughing and the joke was on her.

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There is nothing more frustrating than being misinterpreted and then having to sit there and listen to bull. Why don't you talk to her about it later in her office and tell her what the deal REALLY was, because people have a tendency to make assumptions and you don't want to affect your relationship or grades later on because she thinks you are not a team player or that you don't want others to do assessments on you. In regards to you crying, I think that was normal and expected. I would do the same thing. Nursing is stressful enough as it is, without you being zoned in on (in a negative way) by an instructor. It will get better.:)

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