In response to cost cutting.

[eriksoln, BSN, RN]

My hospital, just like most of yours, has engaged in some interesting cost cutting techniques during the recession. Its effects on care and the general employee moral can't be measured.

"Keeping your M/S unit fully staffed for the night shift by not taking away the CNA, $80."

"Keeping the housekeeping staff on duty instead of sending them home, $64"

"Having all wound dressing supplies stocked so you pt's can have personalized, proper wound care, $150"

"Improved emplyee moral, priceless"

Somehow, hospital admin., in their endless wisdom:jester: (sarcasm, its my weakness), doesn't get this. Somehow, it makes sense to them to cut staffing, save $100 today, but risk million dollar lawsuits tomorrow. Guess ma dar nursen scheewl done taught me da rong kinda math, cause dat dar don't add up fer me.

They continuously cut staffing everywhere, here and there, and turn the duties into nursing duties. Its really all they know how to do really. They are supposed to be entrepreneurs and all, but when it comes down to it, this is really all they know how to do. Also, with nursing staff cut, critical care units are unable to accept as many pt's as they once did. So, what we have here is a dangerous situation:

1. Acuity on General M/S units and the like is going up at an alarming rate.

2. Staff on said units are spending less and less time with pt's as they continuously have duties away from the pt. added to their list of chores.

Pt's that need more care + nurses being elsewhere, busy doing other things = LAWSUIT

But, I can't do anything about it. As my manager has pointed out to a great many people on the unit, there are many nurses who would love an opportunity at my position if I would like to..........move on.

Well, if you can't beat'em, join'em.

I have an idea. Lets all pick up new, non-nursing related skills, so they we can fill this new Wild Card style Nursing job description as it should be filled. People like me can learn new skills to save the hospital money. Schools can add trades to their curriculum (plumbing, accounting, computer hardware, cooking, w/e) so new nurses will have this and be able to find jobs.

Me, I think I am going to go with plumbing. Yes, plumbing. Once I am done cleaning out my pt's pipes with an enema, I can fix their clogged pipes in the BR too. I will be a true F. Nightingale.

What do you think you will do to help?

[fungez]

I shoulda gone to plumbing school. It can't be any ickier than being a nurse, plus you get to play with fire.

I think I'll volunteer to take on the nurse recruiter duties. As far as I can tell, all they do is shred resumes and delete voicemails and emails without looking at them.

[CNL2B]

What will I, personally, do to help? Try to keep my head above water, and support my coworkers as best I can.

[Neveranurseagain, RN]

WOW Erik! I love your ideas! I'm pretty handy, and am a pro at fixing toilets. Should I put this on my next resume? Will it give me a leg up vs another candidate?

[eriksoln, BSN, RN]

What will I, personally, do to help? Try to keep my head above water, and support my coworkers as best I can.

Soooo...............you're going to be a Lifeguard? Guess if your hospital has aqua therapy it can help.

[annacnatorn]

You forgot to add "electrician and engineer"....machines and wires...ooy!

what are they going to try to make us do next? become a car mechanic?

[TwilightRNurse]

Like all hospitals mine is all attempting to cut costs by cutting staffing. I can't say too much because I don't want to be recongnized but they are doing some things that I seriously think will come back to bite them in the butt. The owners financial worth is public knowledge and it is in the "millions", the executives get bonuses in excess of 1 million dollars a year. Why can't they cut their salaries a bit? Give up their yearly bonuses? How much money does one really need? Why do they always try to pull all of the cuts out of their loyal employees who take such pride in taking care of the patients? I just don't get it, I really dont.

[PetiteOpRN]

I suppose I can spare a few moments to be the eye-candy-in-scrubs.

Anything to get those Press Ganey scores up. I'm such a team player.

[scoochy]

I like to cook comfort foods; the kind that put insulation on your hips, and clog your arteries. This will keep business booming in the C-V department, and will support your desire to "unclog pipes."

[country mom]

One nurse I used to work with (she'd been a nurse for like, 100 years) said to the manager one day,"why don't you just stick a broom up my ...... and I'll sweep the floor while I run down the hall", in response to a demand for yet another task.

Another suggestion I came up with while working nights (yeah, I've got a sarcastic streak too) was to run one of those 1-900 phone services. That would generate alot of money- after all, I hear they charge by the minute. It wouldn't be too far off course, considering some of the wacky "ask-a-nurse" calls I've dealt with.

[carolmaccas66, BSN, RN]

Add to the list answering phones, endlessly swiping visitors in and out of psych units, fixing fax machines, trying to find that eensy tiny bit of paper stuck in the photocopier machine to fix it - that is what I seem to do instead of actually nursing people and using my brain.

[carolmaccas66, BSN, RN]

One nurse I used to work with (she'd been a nurse for like, 100 years) said to the manager one day,"why don't you just stick a broom up my ...... and I'll sweep the floor while I run down the hall", in response to a demand for yet another task.

Another suggestion I came up with while working nights (yeah, I've got a sarcastic streak too) was to run one of those 1-900 phone services. That would generate alot of money- after all, I hear they charge by the minute. It wouldn't be too far off course, considering some of the wacky "ask-a-nurse" calls I've dealt with.

Hysterical!! Keep em coming!