I'm a sexless nurse, part 2

Published

I remember a few years ago I got torn to shreds on this forum because I said that as a male nurse, I generally don't catheterize women. In fact all the places I've worked, from New Zealand, Switzerland, England and Australia, what generally happens is men catheterize men, while the women catheterize the women. 

I made a rational argument, the most pragmatic being that men need a female chaperone anyway, so what's the point? The other obvious point was that women do not want men doing such intimate procedures on them if a female is available. The last argument I used was the fact that no male nurse I've ever known has catheterized a young woman eg 18yr old girl - neither the young woman or their mother would want a guy to do this, which is completely understandable. 

Naturally, it was the American nurses calling me sexist, and stating that they would be happy to let  male do such a procedure on their daughter. As we say in the rest of the world 'Only in America'.

Anyway, I feel compelled to add an update after my time working here in the Australian outback ie the middle of the desert. 

The culture out here is utterly alien to the average perspective promoted on this forum, specifically in regards to gender and their designated roles. Basically, there is absolutely no way a male would be doing any of these procedures on a woman of any age, and in fact even when doing an ECG (EKG) the female patients have a female nurse do this whenever practical. In this culture, men and women have quite specific roles. 

One of the most shocking things I came across has to do with the domestic fights I see here.

Sadly, the town I'm in sees a lot of violence and most shifts I usually see a battered woman, and recently I overhead two female patients talking to each other, with the first asking the second lady: 

'Does your husband beat you?' The second lady looked shocked and said 'Of course not'. The first lady replied 'Then he doesn't love you.' That completely threw me. But to balance things out, it turns out the women here fight back, and I've seen more men with stab wounds due to their partners in 2 months, than I have in two years in city hospitals. 

Basically it's a different world out here, and gender does matter, and if any big city nurse tried bringing their woke values out here, they would have to adapt, or not be able to function. In fact the culture shock might be too much for them. 

11
Up Vote Up Vote ×

Welcome back? ?

6
Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Community Health, Med/Surg, ICU Stepdown.

I think I'm a "big city nurse with woke values" but I still don't want a guy to put a catheter in me! LOL 

I think it all just depends on the patient's comfort, but it's nice when male nurses offer the option of a female nurse assisting female patients with intimate care if that is an option. All the male nurses I've met are respectful and would never do anything to make a female patient feel uncomfortable, ut women with a history of sexual assault may feel more comfortable with a female regardless of how respectful the male nurses are. Just my 2 cents!

10
Up Vote Up Vote ×

When did healthcare professionals performing necessary healthcare procedures on patients start falling under the "woke" umbrella?  When did healthcare professionals start using the word "woke" in a context other than "patient woke with a headache?" Wow, one can learn so much on the internets these days...

In the U.S., it's normal for nursing professionals to deliver professional care to their assigned patients. Other parts of the world have different cultural beliefs when it comes to gender roles, and there's nothing wrong with those beliefs. Here's a radical idea for you; we even honor cultural requests whenever possible! There are many people throughout the world who prefer same sex providers. There are many people throughout the world who prefer competent providers, regardless of their genitals. Was there a reason you made your post other than trying to stir the pot?

19
Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Community Health, Med/Surg, ICU Stepdown.
1 hour ago, Closed Account 12345 said:

When did healthcare professionals performing necessary healthcare procedures on patients start falling under the "woke" umbrella?  When did healthcare professionals start using the word "woke" in a context other than "patient woke with a headache?" Wow, one can learn so much on the internets these days...

In the U.S., it's normal for nursing professionals to deliver professional care to their assigned patients. Other parts of the world have different cultural beliefs when it comes to gender roles, and there's nothing wrong with those beliefs. Here's a radical idea for you; we even honor cultural requests whenever possible! There are many people throughout the world who prefer same sex providers. There are many people throughout the world who prefer competent providers, regardless of their genitals. Was there a reason you made your post other than trying to stir the pot?

LOL I'm not sure how the topic relates to being woke or not either! Maybe he is saying that people in the US who think they are "woke" wouldn't want to respect a patient's preference for the gender of their provider because we don't believe in traditional gender roles? Making a patient comfortable, taking into account their preferences and culture, are all part of what being "woke" is supposed to be. But I think that word is kind of funny anyway, who knows if it means what it's supposed to. It's possible to support trans and nonbinary people and women's rights and to also understand why a woman might prefer care from another woman in certain circumstances. To me the two topics don't have to do with each other, but maybe someone can explain = )

7
Up Vote Up Vote ×

Actually, I'm more referring to a nurse's preference. 

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Med-Surg.

As a male, it has always been my preference and my comfort level to ask a female coworker to catheterize a female patient since I need a female in the room anyway.  The exception being when I'm precepting I will be in the room instructing the student.  Or the rare occasion I don't have a coworker that has time to do it and there is a female CNA available I'll do it.  

I'm "woke" as well and understand that the competence of the care provider matters more than their gender and everyone is equal, but like the poster above I am more comfortable with same gender persons which is why I've always had a male doctor but have always been okay when he's precepting a female PA or NP have a look at me and ask personal gender-specific questions but overall my comfort is with same gendered people.  Maybe because I feel that way I project it on others and need to take a look at that.  Male nurses aren't as much an oddity as when I was younger.

Other cultures are indeed different.  When I was in India a while back I noticed that males and females rarely mingled in public.

5
Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Urgent Care, Oncology.

I mean, is the nurse workforce 50/50 outside of the US, meaning half are male and half are female? Because I could have sworn that only 10 to 12% of nurses in the US are male. My first two jobs in healthcare I didn't encounter a single male nurse. In recent experience, there's been maybe one or two male nurses working the floor. I don't have any stats or anything like that, this is just anecdotal experience, but I've noticed a lot of male nurses tend to go the CRNA tract. I have had a lot of surgical procedures and every CRNA that has put me to sleep has been male.

That being said, I don't care who puts a Cath in me as long as they're competent and professional. I'm pregnant, and I don't care who helps me deliver - male or female nurses or doctors. 

5
Up Vote Up Vote ×
12 hours ago, nursingaround1 said:

Anyway, I feel compelled to add an update after my time working here in the Australian outback ie the middle of the desert. 

The culture out here is utterly alien to the average perspective promoted on this forum, specifically in regards to gender and their designated roles. Basically, there is absolutely no way a male would be doing any of these procedures on a woman of any age, and in fact even when doing an ECG (EKG) the female patients have a female nurse do this whenever practical. In this culture, men and women have quite specific roles.

So I guess that means that all OB/GYNs in Australia are women? 

1
Up Vote Up Vote ×

Of course not, but as a nurse, well, no, you won't go far as a male in a obs/gynae role

Up Vote Up Vote ×
13 hours ago, nursingaround1 said:

The culture out here is utterly alien to the average perspective promoted on this forum, specifically in regards to gender and their designated roles. Basically, there is absolutely no way a male would be doing any of these procedures on a woman of any age, and in fact even when doing an ECG (EKG) the female patients have a female nurse do this whenever practical. In this culture, men and women have quite specific roles.

25 minutes ago, macawake said:

So I guess that means that all OB/GYNs in Australia are women? 

18 minutes ago, nursingaround1 said:

Of course not, but as a nurse, well, no, you won't go far as a male in a obs/gynae role

Why ”of course not”?

What you’re saying isn’t that men and women have quite specific roles, but rather that physicians and nurses have different roles.
A male physician is obviously fine to perform procedures in female nether regions, but a male nurse is not. Why is that?

4
Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Emergency Department.
13 hours ago, nursingaround1 said:

I remember a few years ago I got torn to shreds on this forum because I said that as a male nurse, I generally don't catheterize women. In fact all the places I've worked, from New Zealand, Switzerland, England and Australia, what generally happens is men catheterize men, while the women catheterize the women. 

I made a rational argument, the most pragmatic being that men need a female chaperone anyway, so what's the point? The other obvious point was that women do not want men doing such intimate procedures on them if a female is available. The last argument I used was the fact that no male nurse I've ever known has catheterized a young woman eg 18yr old girl - neither the young woman or their mother would want a guy to do this, which is completely understandable. 

Naturally, it was the American nurses calling me sexist, and stating that they would be happy to let  male do such a procedure on their daughter. As we say in the rest of the world 'Only in America'.

Anyway, I feel compelled to add an update after my time working here in the Australian outback ie the middle of the desert. 

The culture out here is utterly alien to the average perspective promoted on this forum, specifically in regards to gender and their designated roles. Basically, there is absolutely no way a male would be doing any of these procedures on a woman of any age, and in fact even when doing an ECG (EKG) the female patients have a female nurse do this whenever practical. In this culture, men and women have quite specific roles. 

One of the most shocking things I came across has to do with the domestic fights I see here.

Sadly, the town I'm in sees a lot of violence and most shifts I usually see a battered woman, and recently I overhead two female patients talking to each other, with the first asking the second lady: 

'Does your husband beat you?' The second lady looked shocked and said 'Of course not'. The first lady replied 'Then he doesn't love you.' That completely threw me. But to balance things out, it turns out the women here fight back, and I've seen more men with stab wounds due to their partners in 2 months, than I have in two years in city hospitals. 

Basically it's a different world out here, and gender does matter, and if any big city nurse tried bringing their woke values out here, they would have to adapt, or not be able to function. In fact the culture shock might be too much for them. 

As a male nurse in the UK for 35+ years I have never catheterised a female. I would refuse point blank to do that but I would not expect to be asked. The closest I have come is supporting the patients legs while the (female) nurse got on with it.

 

I'm  not sure what you are trying to do with the second half of your post. Are you telling us an anecdote to entertain us about cultural differences? Are you trying to start a conversation on gender violence? Or is it about domestic violence?

Australians are - rightly or wrongly - seen as a bit rough, tough and uncouth. Very much a generalisation as the Australians I have met have been friendly, cultured and intelligent. However, what you are doing is buying into the stereotype and basically saying that it is all right to beat up women,

a) as long as she is "your" woman and,

b) as long as she fights back.

Perhaps you would be better trying to bring in some 21st century thinking rather than the 18th/19th century thinking you are espousing. 

3
Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Add a Comment