Im Pagan and a Hospice Nurse....

Whispera, MSN, RN · Mar 3, 2012

Is the hospice a religiously-based hospice? Run by a particular faith? If so, it is what it is. What you can do when others are demonstrating their faith, is to quietly center yourself and do what you would do according to your faith to guide you to a good day and a peaceful outcome for your patients. You don't have to buy into another belief. It matters to be true to your own at the same time. I think it's all about peace...

SaylahStarr · Mar 3, 2012

It is not a religously based hospice, in fact, they are suppose to be supportive of all religous choices and backgrounds, yet I have already heard it brought up that "you can tell whos gonna have a horrible death, its those nonbelievers" , quoting another nurse But youre right in what you say in regards to myself.

Whispera, MSN, RN · Mar 3, 2012

Hmmm...those who make remarks about horrible deaths surely aren't practicing their faith! It's better to attend to those who are caring and honorable than those who aren't--we can choose our path without choosing to be irritated by those whose path is a tad tangled...

Creamsoda, ASN, RN · Mar 3, 2012

I would just not say anything. I work in a very catholic hospital. I love working there, but I am not religious what so ever. Theres numerous times where prayer happens. Over the intercom twice a day, sometimes with patients and families and the docs in care conferences. If thats what the family believes, support them in it. I just lower my head while they pray and thats the end of it. Its not about you, its about the families and patients. It shouldn't matter what your faith is. Now if there was a patient who shared similar beliefs to you, then you could help them out and lead them in how ever you pray or acknowledge your faith, but otherwise, just be there to support the patient.

Creamsoda, ASN, RN · Mar 3, 2012

It is not a religously based hospice, in fact, they are suppose to be supportive of all religous choices and backgrounds, yet I have already heard it brought up that "you can tell whos gonna have a horrible death, its those nonbelievers" , quoting another nurse But youre right in what you say in regards to myself.

Well those nurses are being horribly rude. I might just kindly/jokingly in that case say, "guess I'm gonna die a horrible tragic death then huh?", and smile. That might clue them in. But I wouldn't let it bother me because thats what THEY believe, and let em think what they want. But I agree it is rude

SuesquatchRN, BSN, RN · Mar 3, 2012

Well, I'm an agnostic hospice nurse in the buckle on the Bible Belt. My first few weeks were mind boggling to me but then, so were my first few weeks in a hospital in this area.

I sile and say, "Bless your heart" a lot.

tyvin, BSN, RN · Mar 3, 2012

You need to support the person passing to where ever they "believe" they are going to go. I work with a large Buddist population and many of the hospice team are of the western religion. I don't have any concerns until the western tries to inflict their ways onto the eastern or other beliefs or non-believers. I've only had to step in once...an over zealous Christian nurse wanting to save all the Buddist. Even if they don't believe anything you must support that as well (I know you will).

Protect the passing so they may have a safe uninterrupted journey. Your job is to help guide their last journey with dignity. So what if you have to see others pray...doesn't mean you have to. They're going to believe what they want; don't let earshot babble inturrupt what you are really suppose to be doing.

When you're working you are a hospice nurse...they leave this earth having put the utmost trust into us.

IEDave, ASN, CNA, LVN · Mar 3, 2012

I am new to hospice. I have been a nurse for three years and have previously worked in a fairly religously nuetral environment. I suppose I shouldve guessed that hospice would not be such an environment, but I think what has surprised me the most are my coworkers, who seem to be completely unaware that any religious trains of thought exist outside of christianity. I have no problem listening to them and am glad that they believe so whole heartedly in their views, I simply do not agree with them. But the other day I attended my first group meeting with our aide, volunteers, chaplain, sw, etc and they actually prayed before the meeting, assuming, everyone in the room shared the same beliefs as them! This, I found offensive. I am Pagan, Wiccan, more specifically, and I also value religious tolerance, but I am rapidly becoming aware of how much tongue swallowing I am about to be doing.Many of our patients are Christian as well, I expected this, and am ok with it. I am hoping I can find some advice from others who have already walked in my shoes. What is the best wat way to "handle" , if you will, co-workers and patients in a way that is respectful to them but also to....myself??

Other than "keep your head down", not much I can really add to what's been said. As for me, I worked for a televangelical ministry for several years - ended up being the longest stint of employment I've ever had. While I'm nominally Lutheran (raised & baptised, but never really adopted the tenets of the faith) I'd probably be lumped into agnosticism more than anything else at this point - a rather determined fence sitter on the issue.

What ended up working for me was adopting something of a "tourist" viewpoint with the more "fervent" staff members; assumed that I'd never be accepted into their community & expressed curiosity about their viewpoints when the circumstances allowed for it. Worked well enough - they thought I was a soulless heathen & I thought...well, let's leave it right there, shall we?

Other than that, I just kept my professional & personal lives largely separate - while I was on the clock, I was a paid member of the staff & acted accordingly. When off the clock, I'd avoid being critical of the organization while in public & would let fly when around trusted friends. By & large it worked; 'til I got laid off. From what I hear, a fair number of the "holy rollers" got the axe about a year later & the organization's on the financial skids at this point.

Anyhow - I'll assume you're in the minority in your organization & simply point out that people in the minority are typically the ones who are trod upon the most; and, usually end up being the ones that contribute the most as well. Go forth & contribute!

----- Dave

DixieRedHead, ASN, RN · Mar 3, 2012

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

curiousauntie · Mar 3, 2012

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Might be the best solution!

I worked with a nurse who was what I call a "HippaChristian". Her husband was a minister and she was all about her faith...because only her faith counted. When she was around people who did not share her faith, or who were not as vocal as her, she let it roll. She pushed her womans group on each of us nurses, including one nurse who was, like you, Wiccan (and although she didn't announce her views, we all knew, including the religious nurse). She tried not to take no for an answer, and management did nothing about it. My Wiccan friend and I finally told her to STOP as she was making it a hostile work environment. She just could not get that you could be a "heathen" and still practice hospice nursing!

I will pray with patients if they are in need and want to, I discuss the end of life and even the afterlife if they wish. When asked, I say I am spiritual, not religious, even though I grew up with a minister father...(who also calls himself spiritual, not religious).

Intolerance is intolerance. The overly vocal religious feel that their views are right, and in my experience, also feel that if they keep hammering you, you will finally see the light of their views.

Good luck to you...deep breath and as I like to say "Smile and nod...they will eventually stop talking"

Raviepoo · Mar 3, 2012

I'm not a hospice nurse (yet) but as a nursing student and CNA raised in a Jewish family I do a lot of nodding and smiling. It no longer bothers me if it involves patients or families. If it's co-workers asking me to join in prayer I respectfully decline, as is my right.

You're a pagan. Do you believe that all roads lead to the center? Can you just look at these people as choosing to worship a a different pantheon, as if they were praying to Odin or Osiris, or Shiva? You don't have to say their prayers, but respectful silence won't hurt.